Did you say you couldnt afford a 10k ring which is why you have to ask him?
How are you married and he can afford something you can't ?

I believe Suze Orman recommends spend 1 months salary on an engagement ring. Since I assume you earn much more now then you did nine years ago, it's time to pay up! I think you should shop on your own, then bring him into the store to close the deal.

While I wouldn't go so far as to call your hubby an insensitive jerk, I do not think you are being irrational at all here OP and I can totally see why now you would want that ring that I personally feel you are totally entitled to now that he can afford to buy you it.

His reaction was a bit tacky to me and I would react the same way you did.

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to look at the big picture. DH asked you how much you wanted to spend probably because he wanted your input. Just because he isn't reading your mind perfectly shouldn't make you boiling mad.

This! The man didn't say no, he just asked how much. Would you rather he just wing it and guess and buy you a lesser ring than you wanted? I think not

I am the PP - forgot to add, I love my $10,000 engagement ring I got over 10 years ago. Would never spend that kind of money on jewelry now that I have 2 kids and a mortgage, and I don't even wear it that often, but I love having it.

You should have your ring. Sounds like you can afford it. We only live once - not everything has to be logical and 'make sense.'

A decent 1.5 carat diamond is going to set you back more than $5-10k.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ehhh it is 15 years later. Get a ring, sure, but not 5-10 k. Spend a couple thousand and call it a day. Pick it out yourself because you know your ass will be picky if he picks it out.

This is OP. No. I don't want a "couple thousand" ring. This isn't a random birthday present, and he's not that poor student loaded down with school debt anymore. Like heck I'm letting him get away with a $2,000 ring as token of our marriage.

I'd rather not have a ring at all.

Bitch.

And you are....?


People spend $2K on daycare and Dunkin Donuts. Sorry, I'm with OP on that one.

2k on Dublin doughnut? Are you buying a franchise?

I know someone whose Starbucks budget is over $2,000 a year.

Anonymous wrote:Are you having a midlife crisis? B/c usually it's only young suckers that buy into the diamond is forever spiels put out by the cartel.

You realize diamonds are effectively worthless; there is no secondary market except pawn shops?

You are taking thousands of your family's money and throwing it away, and you are old enough to know better, unlike the lovestruck yoing adults who buy into some fantasy.

Are you so wealthy that 10k is nothing to you? Like making millions per year? I suspect not so this whole affair confuses me.

This smells like some major midlife mojo; to be a young bride again...

Are you a man or a woman? Married? If woman and married, do you have an engagement ring? Just curious...

By the way, I am fully aware that diamonds (and luxury cars, and boats, and designer handbags, and lots of pricey things that people want) have little to no investment value. Heck, the chocolate pie I bought for dessert the other day had little to no nutritional value! That's why I am looking for people's opinions on this board. If I wanted to open up a college fund for my kids, I wouldn't be so torn about it. It would be done.

At least you don't eat diamond rings and they don't go straight to your thighs after paying all that money. I can give it to my DD years later when she is older.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ehhh it is 15 years later. Get a ring, sure, but not 5-10 k. Spend a couple thousand and call it a day. Pick it out yourself because you know your ass will be picky if he picks it out.

This is OP. No. I don't want a "couple thousand" ring. This isn't a random birthday present, and he's not that poor student loaded down with school debt anymore. Like heck I'm letting him get away with a $2,000 ring as token of our marriage.

I'd rather not have a ring at all.

Bitch.

And you are....?


People spend $2K on daycare and Dunkin Donuts. Sorry, I'm with OP on that one.

2k on Dublin doughnut? Are you buying a franchise?

Are you having a midlife crisis? B/c usually it's only young suckers that buy into the diamond is forever spiels put out by the cartel.

You realize diamonds are effectively worthless; there is no secondary market except pawn shops?

You are taking thousands of your family's money and throwing it away, and you are old enough to know better, unlike the lovestruck yoing adults who buy into some fantasy.

Are you so wealthy that 10k is nothing to you? Like making millions per year? I suspect not so this whole affair confuses me.

This smells like some major midlife mojo; to be a young bride again...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ehhh it is 15 years later. Get a ring, sure, but not 5-10 k. Spend a couple thousand and call it a day. Pick it out yourself because you know your ass will be picky if he picks it out.

This is OP. No. I don't want a "couple thousand" ring. This isn't a random birthday present, and he's not that poor student loaded down with school debt anymore. Like heck I'm letting him get away with a $2,000 ring as token of our marriage.

I'd rather not have a ring at all.

Bitch.

And you are....?


People spend $2K on daycare and Dunkin Donuts. Sorry, I'm with OP on that one.

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I just want to say that I really appreciate everyone's input. I guess *wanting* a ring after all these years isn't crazy. I just have to work on my delivery and not be witchy about it. Thank you DCUM.

Bipolar. We get it.

"I think I am overreacting in some ways. I wish I were more mature and felt less pissy about all this. "

The whole world wishes the same.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ehhh it is 15 years later. Get a ring, sure, but not 5-10 k. Spend a couple thousand and call it a day. Pick it out yourself because you know your ass will be picky if he picks it out.

This is OP. No. I don't want a "couple thousand" ring. This isn't a random birthday present, and he's not that poor student loaded down with school debt anymore. Like heck I'm letting him get away with a $2,000 ring as token of our marriage.

I'd rather not have a ring at all.

Bitch.