There are thousands of children who are in need. Give to a charity, Freecycle, a church. Stop complaining and be grateful that having too much is your only problem.

just keep talking about it and hopefully she'll get the hint. Mine did this year after hearing me talk about the things dd likes and I like for her, and finally realizing I'm not some crunchy granola freak and my husband actually shares my parenting beliefs. She made a snarky comment about how she couldn't buy anything character themed for dd because she isn't allowed to watch tv (not entirely true but she's also not even two). But whatever, she showed remarkable restraint this year and DH and I are thrilled.

I've had this problem. It really starts to become a problem when the stuff they give starts to accumulate, faster than you can get rid of it. It takes a ton of energy to deal with it and get it out of your house (more energy than it takes for them to buy it). We've given up trying to say something because it doesn't stop the behavior (which could very well be pathological like an addiction or compulsion). My new year's resolution is to get the extra stuff OUT OF THE HOUSE. It helps when they outgrow the toys, but even if the toys are well and good, too many of anything is a bad thing when your kid can't walk through their room because of all the stuff. All you can do is donate and be minimalist. I'm hoping the older the kids get, the fun of the ILs buying and giving gifts will wear off. Not to make light of grieving but I just realized it's like the 5 stages of grief.
Stage 1: Denial (Did they really just give us that much stuff?! Again?!)
Stage 2: Anger (How dare they keep giving us more stuff when we've asked them to cut back! I don't have the time or energy to deal with it all! If they don't stop, I'm not going to spend Christmas with them ever again!)
Stage 3: Bargaining (If they would give presents only on birthdays and Christmas, maybe it won't be so bad. Maybe we can just get them to only buy books.)
Stage 4: Depression (There is so much crap it's overwhelming. I'm exhausted looking at the piles. It's never going to end.)
Stage 5: Acceptance (I can't change their behavior. I can only donate to charity.)

It goes both ways in my family. My mom overbuys almost to the point of compulsivity, which is nice in a way but also is wasteful. My son has a ridiculously full closet, full of stuff he wears now and stuff for later. His bookshelf is overflowing. She buys toys when they go on sale and saves them for later in the year. Buying things is the way she shows love.

My MIL is the opposite. She is extremely tight with money with DS but has always been extremely generous with her other 2 grandchildren. Although it isn't about the material things, it still can be hurtful to hear what she does for the other 2 that she doesn't do for DS. She came in for the holidays and asked if I had any wrapped gifts that I hadn't given to him yet because she really wanted him to open a gift from her. Yes, you read that correctly. She wanted us to provide a gift for her to give to DS so that she could get "credit" for giving him a present. Then this morning she went on at length about the expensive birthday present she is getting for one of her other grandchildren in March.

This was a long way of saying that I've experienced both extremes. As much as I dislike extra "stuff", I like knowing that my mom is thinking about my son so often that she is constantly finding things for him. As opposed to my MIL who I feel can't really be bothered. I told her a few things he is into lately and she couldn't find time in her busy (retired) schedule to go to any kind of store and find something to give to him. I'd be lying if I said it hasn't affected our relationship. It's not the material aspect, but the lack of thought that bothers me.

As time goes by, you can tell your MIL what you need and what you don't. Maybe provide some limits? Like more clothes and books and fewer toys? My mom likes it when I give her something specific that I really need, like socks or pajamas. Then she gets to give, which she loves, but it's actually stuff we need.

Anonymous wrote:I just got back from spending the morning returning things all across town for store credit for things we need later. And most of the rest of these ridiculous amount of grandparent gifts are going on Ebay. My kids got so much stuff they got tired of opening and didn't even look at most of it. So I'm keeping what they have played with and getting rid of the rest. We don't have the space, either.

You sound rude and like you are teaching your children to be rude.

Since you mention she has also gone overboard with buying things for your SIL's child, she might be overly sensitive to making sure it doesn't appear she is favoring her granddaughter, and trying to be "equal."

I agree with PP that asked if some of the stuff can be kept at her home--particularly if she is buying things you won't need 'till later, like clothing in a larger size, toys or books that baby won't be ready for until later, high chair, etc. Maybe if she needs to start making room in her own house for all the baby stuff, she'll see how hard it is for you to store it all in your home.