When I first started reading your post, I thought you were saying she didn't want her kid receiving princess gifts, which I get and if my SIL made that request we'd honor it. DH wants to make that request (more of a ban on all licensed characters) but I've convinced him it's a bit rude so he's holding off on saying anything for now.

But if she's telling you what gifts your kids should be allowed to receive because her kids will be there - then, um, that's not how the world works. I don't know what else to say about that. So weird.

How can this woman control what Santa brings. Give what you want from Santa and see what she says.

Anonymous wrote:I feel sorry for her kids. They are going to be a mess when they go away to college.

I know a woman like this who is a contol freak and homeschooled her two girls. The oldest one is doing the opposite of everything thing her mom wants now and the younger one is cutting herself.

I wouldn't say anything. Just buy your kids whatever you were planning to buy them. If you weren't going to get a princess doll, then no skin off your nose. If you were, then do it anyway. Telling other people what to buy their kids is nuts.

No way would someone tell me what my kids can and can't get for Christmas and then to go as far as telling you your kids can't bring their toys around. UGH NO WAY!!

She's ridiculous. Ignore.

BOY, does my MIL have it EASY!!!!

Oh I wouldn't stand for this at all and I wouldn't be passive aggressive about it. I would respond along the lines of, "It is a great deal of trouble to me for you to presume that you may instruct me on what to give my own children for Christmas. Please know that I have considered your request and rejected it. We will decide what to purchase and give to our children."

Email:

Larla,

I'm sorry, but I followed your instructions for what to buy your children. I don't have time to exchange the item, but I have included a gift receipt and once your child has received the gift, you are welcome to exchange the item for a gift you deem more appropriate.

As for gifts for our children, we want to make Christmas special for them, so we are ensuring that they get the gifts that they really want or have asked for. If you are concerned about your children's reaction to our children's gifts, I'll let you know when to distract your children so that they don't see our children opening their gifts.

Looking forward to seeing you at Christmas!

Love,

Your cousin, Suzie.

I would ignore.

Anonymous wrote:I have a SIL like this, and expects our entire family to accommodate her. I am so tempted sometimes to purposely do the opposite.

Oh, I do too, and 12 years into our marriage, it still annoys me! Betting that she is your DH's youngest sister, right? (Only youngest children get away with behavior like this, because their family coddled them when they were growing up. And even now of course, DH and the others still don't see how they are the enablers.)

I think you should buy your daughter the "Princess doll" AND mom and daughter both should dress up like princesses too - foofy skirt and tiara and all - for christmas. It will be a hoot!

Pick and choose what requests of hers you will accommodate.

Just because she requests, doesn't mean you have to oblige.

And I would not say anything. No obligation, either, to explain or justify.

This reminds me of the stroller scene issue in the movie Away We Go

http://youtu.be/I6CMxvwRA-o

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait one minute ....are you saying she tells you what to get your own kids at Christmas because her kids will be there?

no way. You have won the award for craziest relative request ever . I'm stunned if that is what you were explaining

Yep, that's what I'm saying. She phrases it as "I don't want to be any trouble. Maybe you could give any gifts like that for her upcoming birthday instead of Christmas morning."

Do you respond with "actually, that IS trouble because Larla has her heart set on Princess Barbie, her house, car, pets and every outfit made. And since it's Christmas, Santa will be granting her wish"

Anonymous wrote:

She phrases it as "I don't want to be any trouble. Maybe you could give any gifts like that for her upcoming birthday instead of Christmas morning."

"No, unfortunately, we will not be able to do that. Just wanted to let you know ahead of time so that you could plan accordingly."

+1