OP, either go on walks with her (and don't make them too long) or…get a treadmill "for the two of you."

I've been both heavy and in awesome shape (a number of times) and I can tell you the easier you make it, the better it will be.

In CA, I jogged or hiked in the mountains 5 days a week. We moved here and with the first blast of cold weather, I promptly went from in-shape to a darn mess. But I figured it out: A treadmill in front of the TV; that's how I stay in shape in DC.

Anonymous wrote:Go to the gym together? Who's going to watch the children?

Some gyms have day care options. In fact, when our kids were very young, I think that's what got my wife to really get serious about exercise. It was a great way to get someone else to watch the kids during the day!

Anonymous wrote:Hehehehehe. Sure that's the worst that can happen.

LOL

Divorce

she could kill you

She could get in shape and leave you for a hotter guy

Go to the gym together? Who's going to watch the children?
OP, start with a gift certificate for a massage here and there. Encourage her to start a wellness program that includes things like that. Does she wear a FitBit? That can be eye-opening. Finally, make love more. It's aerobic!

Anonymous wrote:I'm so glad I'm not a heterosexual man, sentenced to a lifetime of pussyfooting around a hypersensitive woman.

What do you mean... is his wife on a budget that he controls... if she wants a membership she will get one.

"What's the Worst that Could Happen if I Bought my Wife Toilet Paper for her Birthday"

this is NOT a gift!

You will never have sex again. So sorry.

Here is a little idea of what might happen!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Twivg7GkYts

Work on the folding Donny! Bye, Bye!

I'm so glad I'm not a heterosexual man, sentenced to a lifetime of pussyfooting around a hypersensitive woman.

I would love it if my husband got me a gym membership and then told me which chores that he would completely take over for me so I could schedule gym workouts. I do pretty well getting exercise in, but I could definitely improve. My problem is that I am not willing to let the house go to sh*t, lose sleep, or quit my job to get the exercise I might like.

I agree that a team or family centered approach is best. Get tennis lessons for the family, or bikes for everyone. Sign up for a family hike. If you do get gym membership, make sure its for both of you and that you take care of childcare issues.

DH and I recently both got fitbits, and it's been fun keeping up with each other. Cheap--we got the $50 ones--and keeps you motivated do walk the steps.

OP back... tks for the wise words, boys and girls, i had a good chuckle on a few of them but do appreciate all posts. i think i now have a plan on how to go about getting it done. will report back soon (if i'm not dead )

I heard about a guy who gave his wife an exercise bike for Valentine's Day. In his defense, the sweatpants and shirt he also got her were red.

If you just purchase her a gym membership w/out her requesting it, then you are sending her a very clear message and that is the message that you clearly told us.

Sure, perhaps it is "time" for her to shape up, but to me it sounds more like "shape up or ship out..."

Is that how you define marriage OP?

Present this as something you arranged that you TWO can do together. Honey, I thought it would be fun to go the gym together.

I would love it. I would know if I wasn't at my best and I'd know my partner knew. I'm not sensitive and I think it's crazy for her to be. I bought DH a gym membership June 1st. He's gone once, but I encourage him to go daily In the evening with me. I even bought our two young kids daycare memberships so he has no excuses,