Anonymous
07/22/2014 14:01
Subject: Husband make you feel desirable?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If you've been married for awhile, maybe more than 7 years and have kids, do you generally feel like your husband desires you? Like, you feel attractive and wanted? If so, how does he show it?
I'm just wondering what it's like.
Does your husband know what makes you feel like he desires you?
For example, the PP whose husband is constantly groping her and talking dirty, but she wants him to say she's gorgeous. He may think he's doing something that makes her feel good and tells her how much he desires her. She wants something else.
I have a bit of this problem in my marriage (DH here). My wife does not feel very attractive; she's cute, but has always struggled with weight and still does; she's a little plump. I find her attractive and I try to do things to show how excited I am, but many of them (feeling up her ass, or groping a boob) are really hated. In fact, the only thing she likes is holding her face in my hands and kissing her. Which is nice...but it's because she feels so unhappy about her body that any other touches kind of remind her of that. She'd prefer to get under the sheets, lay back and for me to just appear, ready to go, and do everything. I have a hard time getting aroused when I'm constantly worried I'm touching the wrong place. For example: I love boobs/nipples, but she doesn't like her nipples being touched!
Ugh. Suggestions?
I'm a DH so I might be leading you 180 degrees wrong, but I'd suggest pushing through some of that. My guess is that by acquiescing to her every insecurity you have slowly but surely gotten to this spot where your sex life is very limited.
If she draws a hard line, obviously respect that, but when you have her worked up a little bit, maybe really pay attention to areas of her body you like (even if she doesn't) and tell her what you like and what you like about it.
Anonymous
07/22/2014 13:54
Subject: Husband make you feel desirable?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If you've been married for awhile, maybe more than 7 years and have kids, do you generally feel like your husband desires you? Like, you feel attractive and wanted? If so, how does he show it?
I'm just wondering what it's like.
Does your husband know what makes you feel like he desires you?
For example, the PP whose husband is constantly groping her and talking dirty, but she wants him to say she's gorgeous. He may think he's doing something that makes her feel good and tells her how much he desires her. She wants something else.
I have a bit of this problem in my marriage (DH here). My wife does not feel very attractive; she's cute, but has always struggled with weight and still does; she's a little plump. I find her attractive and I try to do things to show how excited I am, but many of them (feeling up her ass, or groping a boob) are really hated. In fact, the only thing she likes is holding her face in my hands and kissing her. Which is nice...but it's because she feels so unhappy about her body that any other touches kind of remind her of that. She'd prefer to get under the sheets, lay back and for me to just appear, ready to go, and do everything. I have a hard time getting aroused when I'm constantly worried I'm touching the wrong place. For example: I love boobs/nipples, but she doesn't like her nipples being touched!
Ugh. Suggestions?
Anonymous
07/22/2014 13:32
Subject: Husband make you feel desirable?
Anonymous wrote:a man's job is not to make you feel desirable. your job is to be desirable.
to OP: are you at your most desirable?
Pffft. I'm a guy. My wife & I are in it for the long haul; the least we can do is make each other happy by showing each other we desire each other.