Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We'll accomplish the same thing by just having a party About 3 months after the baby is born. We won't call it a sip and see, we'll just invite our friends to a party and feed them and supply booze.

The people who care about babies can coo over the baby, the ones who don't can ignore him.

NP here, tomato tomahto. Don't be so smug just because you're not referring to it as a sip n see.

When does it become acceptable to have a party after having a child, then? Or can you just not ever host parties after you have children?

Seriously, this is crazy. We had parties 2-3 times a year for friends before having children. After DS was born, we still did that. We will keep doing it after #2 is on the scene too, and will not worry about whether having a party while also having a three-month-old that people haven't met yet is considered a "gift grab." (Not to mention that the etiquette police also call for a host/hostess gift for a non-baby party...ah, what to do?!?) Luckily, most of our friends do/did the same, so what goes around comes around, and everyone is happy.

Anonymous wrote:We'll accomplish the same thing by just having a party About 3 months after the baby is born. We won't call it a sip and see, we'll just invite our friends to a party and feed them and supply booze.

The people who care about babies can coo over the baby, the ones who don't can ignore him.

Yeah, we had a BBQ with fireworks on the 4th of July but didn't call it a 4th of July party. I have a small party with friends on the day of my birth every year, but it isn't a birthday party.

What is the deal with people and labels? To think people like to celebrate events with people in their lives they care about.

People will give the new baby gifts when the baby arrives, period! Whether they mail them, bring them over at a sip and see, or simply call to make an appointment to see the new baby, there will be new baby gifts given at the birth of a baby.

I think a Sip and See (whether you call it that or not) sounds fun - I always worry about calling and baldly inviting myself over to see the new baby, given I hate to wake a woman who might have just drifted off, and I know everyone else is calling for the same reason, so having something organized eliminates all that.

On another note, my husband threw a casual close family and friends get together a few days after my son was born. I thought he was crazy beforehand to have people over so soon. In the end though, it was nice to get everyone who was chomping at the bit to see the baby together all at once in a two hour window. I love then and all, but did not want the constant company of people trickling in over the course of weeks.

Anonymous wrote:Man, what parties are ok with the dcum etiquette patrol?

Sounds like anything halfway normal is tacky and a gift grab.

Right???? Idgaf what Emily Post or others say as it's totally normal and common for family to host showers in my culture. No, not a gift grab and we don't think it's tacky as its never been an etiquette issue.

I was given a sip n see after my son was born and I returned to my hometown with the baby. Just like a shower with gifts and the whole thing. But I would NEVER have hosted this myself. I think, if you are hosting this yourself, you should just call it a party. Accomplishes your goal without seeming tacky.

We had a sip and see about 6 weeks after I delivered. It was hosted at our house by my BFF and SIL. Some brought gifts, some didn't - no biggie as we weren't expecting anything. It was more just a party and people got to see the baby. It was a blast since it included everyone (kids, husbands, etc) and I could have a cocktail too!
I have a super easy baby though who was passed all around and never cried once! And maybe I have strange friends but a lot of the men held the baby too

I HATE showers so this was how I could satisfy my BFF as a FTM who was dying to give me a shower.

Just have a big party and invite everyone over. Don't call it anything. The baby will be there.

I did it for both of my kids within a week they were born. Specifically asked for no gifts, and honestly, most people are good about washing hands etc., though I think people go overboard here too. And the babies sleep so much. Really, only the moms/girls who love babies will want to hold your child. And those who aren't interested in kids just won't come, so don't worry about it. We made it in the early afternoon so there was little to do besides set up some dips/chips/cheese/veggies and cookies. And I had a C-section with both, and that wasn't a problem either though I imagine it can vary!

Man, what parties are ok with the dcum etiquette patrol?

Sounds like anything halfway normal is tacky and a gift grab.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Etiquette police, please correct me if I'm wrong, but I was under the impression that it is always incorrect for family members (e.g. your MIL) to host showers. So she may be out of line to begin with.

That is correct.

Not true in modern times, folks. It's quite common and completely ok. Slow your roll.

http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2012/07/whos-to-host-responsibility-of-the-baby-shower/

Give it up. I don't care if "Emily Post" (who is probably doing pirouettes in her grave if that's the kind of advice being given under her name) says it's okay; it's a bald gift grab when hosted by family no matter how sweet the motivation. Your family should not beg for gifts for you.

Your sip and see sounds lovely - who wouldn't be excited to see "come meet our baby!"? Just son't say anything about gifts on the invite! I think by 2-3 months most everyone feels physically recovered. (I took a long time to recover from my scheduled c-section and by then I felt much better). Keeping the party length to 2-3 hours instead of 3-4 will probably be easier for both you and baby. Both of my babies were in the NICU, so we were told to be more cautious about germs, but if it's a group of grown-ups they aren't going to be a snotty, disgusting group, you know?

I was a nervous pregnant lady and didn't let my friends throw a shower...instead, we had a ridiculously large baptism. i think that's also inappropriate. When I confessed to my best friend that i was embarrassed that we got so out of control - she laughed and said since I wouldn't have a shower - and since we had so much food and booze, i was off the etiquette hook...So, sip and see away, provide ample eats and enjoy. You'll want to show everyone your baby (germs not withstanding) and just make sure you have some hand sanitizer around for grubby kids. And DCUM grumps be damned.