Anonymous
Post 06/28/2014 06:54     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

I allowed them this year, DD is 8. I realized I want her to grow up being comfortable in her skin, at least more comfortable than I am in mine. I don't want to have clothing arguments with her, if I can help it.
Anonymous
Post 06/28/2014 00:55     Subject: Re:how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

Go ahead and mock it; I personally think there is value in modesty. I get it, we have entire generations of women in this country that believe that walking around in your underwear (essentially) somehow makes girls feel confident, love their bodies, and plus....don't they look sooo cute?!! But me, I think it just makes boys and girls draw more sexual attention to their bodies, think about sex more, and ultimately have sex more. Something that I think there is value in delaying until kids are actually adults. No, I am not interested in my kids wearing dresses and long leggings to swim in, but let me ask you this: do you think the girls who use ultra-modest swimwear are feeling really sexy in their dresses and leggings? Do you think boys are viewing them as girls who might be easy to have sex with? Do you think older men are staring at their butts and boobs? Do you think they believe their sexiness is equal to confidence and attractiveness?


We have entire generations of women in this country who think that there are more important matters than how much skin a girl or woman shows or doesn't show. Or, anyway, I wish we did.

And if older men are staring at the butts and boobs of young teenage girls, regardless of what the young teenage girls are wearing, then those older men need to control themselves and stop doing that.


I'm not sure why you think "men need to stop looking" at sexy women. Isn't that a very foundational part of how we humans function? Isn't that the point? And ultimately isn't that what women want? None of us would be here without basic sexual attraction between men and women -- it's something that is supposed to happen and something that we want to happen (or did, when we were young and single). Scantily-clad women send a message that we, by our very nature, are designed to be sending and receiving. I think it's ridiculous to simultaneously show off your nearly-naked body in mini-bits of clothing which are designed specifically to make you look sexy, but then be upset at men (of any age) for looking at it. And sure, you want to let your daughter in on this exchange, I guess that's your business. But to answer OPs question, it's not something I want for my daughter - not like this - which is why the females in my house do not wear bikinis.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 23:32     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the bikini. A 2 piece that shows just a little tummy would be cute. If she likes it. Depends on how it fits.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 21:36     Subject: Re:how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:

Go ahead and mock it; I personally think there is value in modesty. I get it, we have entire generations of women in this country that believe that walking around in your underwear (essentially) somehow makes girls feel confident, love their bodies, and plus....don't they look sooo cute?!! But me, I think it just makes boys and girls draw more sexual attention to their bodies, think about sex more, and ultimately have sex more. Something that I think there is value in delaying until kids are actually adults. No, I am not interested in my kids wearing dresses and long leggings to swim in, but let me ask you this: do you think the girls who use ultra-modest swimwear are feeling really sexy in their dresses and leggings? Do you think boys are viewing them as girls who might be easy to have sex with? Do you think older men are staring at their butts and boobs? Do you think they believe their sexiness is equal to confidence and attractiveness?


We have entire generations of women in this country who think that there are more important matters than how much skin a girl or woman shows or doesn't show. Or, anyway, I wish we did.

And if older men are staring at the butts and boobs of young teenage girls, regardless of what the young teenage girls are wearing, then those older men need to control themselves and stop doing that.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 20:04     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

My dd has worn a bikini since infancy. She certainly isn't doing it to show off how sexy she is. Gross. It's not a woman's (or girl's) job to dress modestly so that men can control themselves. If you're sexualizing a little girl in a bikini it's because there is something wrong with YOU, not the bikini.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 19:46     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:Early sexualization for simply wearing a 2 piece bathing suit at the beach or pool? Your daughter is a 2nd grader - the only person making this sexual is you and the other adults in your projections. She is innocent. There are plenty of perfectly nice and appropriate 2-piece suits available for your child's age. They are not skimpy or sexy. Of course, don't shop at Victoria's Secret for her suit!


I get your point, but VS makes great bikini top if you actually need support. It's the only bikini top my busty 20 yr old DD wears.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 19:40     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

How old does my daughter have to be?

Old enough to ask for a bikini.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 19:38     Subject: Re:how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:Just because so many young children wear bikinis doesn't make it good, right, etc. It's not necessary to put young children in bikinis. As a fact the only reason to wear a bikini is to look sexy for guys - so yeah. Might want to keep that in mind when thinking about what age to start


Is that so. Have you conducted a survey?
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 17:00     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

These neo-Victorians are also probably the ones who faint at the hint of nipples.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 12:14     Subject: Re:how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:47.

Count me as one of those who sees way too many bikinis that aren't cute, but instead seem to be a little flirty or provocative. DD can wear a rashguard and bottoms or a tankini where maybe only a little bit of her tummy shows. Otherwise, 1-piece all the way.


I agree.

There is no age that's right for a bikini. In fact, as a girl goes through her teen years, the less attention she attracts on a physical/sexual level, the better. Teen years don't need to be spent promoting her sexuality (I realize many people disagree and think that it is fine for their teenage daughters to begin engaging in sexual behavior, but I suppose that's another conversation altogether).

Anyway, as long as she lives at home, she wears a one piece. I don't see bikinis as something that you "graduate to", or suddenly become "old enough" to wear. For the most part, bikinis are immodest and I don't think any women should wear them. (yes OF COURSE I realize there are degrees of modesty within the bikini category - I'm just saying in general). Obviously if my adult daughter chooses to wear one once she is completely independent, then that is her business.


Hey, I saw some girls in swim dresses with leggings under them at our pool. Do you want me to ask them where they got them? Modesty and all that.


Go ahead and mock it; I personally think there is value in modesty. I get it, we have entire generations of women in this country that believe that walking around in your underwear (essentially) somehow makes girls feel confident, love their bodies, and plus....don't they look sooo cute?!! But me, I think it just makes boys and girls draw more sexual attention to their bodies, think about sex more, and ultimately have sex more. Something that I think there is value in delaying until kids are actually adults. No, I am not interested in my kids wearing dresses and long leggings to swim in, but let me ask you this: do you think the girls who use ultra-modest swimwear are feeling really sexy in their dresses and leggings? Do you think boys are viewing them as girls who might be easy to have sex with? Do you think older men are staring at their butts and boobs? Do you think they believe their sexiness is equal to confidence and attractiveness?


Wow! All that because a girl's swimwear shows her tummy? Odd.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 10:09     Subject: Re:how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

No younger then high school.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 10:05     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Tankini would be a good choice. That makes bathroom breaks easier.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 09:12     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

I still don't get why a bikini is sexy and considered walking around in your underwear but a one piece which has only a small bit of more fabric is modest. A girl's abdomen is not her sexiest part and her breasts and behind is generally just as visible in a bikini or one piece.

The deeper issue is how some people seem to think that clothes define a person's sexiness/interest in sex. Their hormones and underlying values play a much bigger role than their choice of bathing suit.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 09:04     Subject: how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Two-pieces are easier to deal with. If you are concerned about modesty, try tankinis or a more athletic style.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2014 06:01     Subject: Re:how old does your daughter have to be to wear a bikini?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:47.

Count me as one of those who sees way too many bikinis that aren't cute, but instead seem to be a little flirty or provocative. DD can wear a rashguard and bottoms or a tankini where maybe only a little bit of her tummy shows. Otherwise, 1-piece all the way.


I agree.

There is no age that's right for a bikini. In fact, as a girl goes through her teen years, the less attention she attracts on a physical/sexual level, the better. Teen years don't need to be spent promoting her sexuality (I realize many people disagree and think that it is fine for their teenage daughters to begin engaging in sexual behavior, but I suppose that's another conversation altogether).

Anyway, as long as she lives at home, she wears a one piece. I don't see bikinis as something that you "graduate to", or suddenly become "old enough" to wear. For the most part, bikinis are immodest and I don't think any women should wear them. (yes OF COURSE I realize there are degrees of modesty within the bikini category - I'm just saying in general). Obviously if my adult daughter chooses to wear one once she is completely independent, then that is her business.


Hey, I saw some girls in swim dresses with leggings under them at our pool. Do you want me to ask them where they got them? Modesty and all that.


Go ahead and mock it; I personally think there is value in modesty. I get it, we have entire generations of women in this country that believe that walking around in your underwear (essentially) somehow makes girls feel confident, love their bodies, and plus....don't they look sooo cute?!! But me, I think it just makes boys and girls draw more sexual attention to their bodies, think about sex more, and ultimately have sex more. Something that I think there is value in delaying until kids are actually adults. No, I am not interested in my kids wearing dresses and long leggings to swim in, but let me ask you this: do you think the girls who use ultra-modest swimwear are feeling really sexy in their dresses and leggings? Do you think boys are viewing them as girls who might be easy to have sex with? Do you think older men are staring at their butts and boobs? Do you think they believe their sexiness is equal to confidence and attractiveness?