Anonymous
05/05/2014 22:09
Subject: Re:Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Anonymous wrote:Honestly if my DH asked to take the kids to his mothers house for the weekend I would cry in happiness. Then I would get my haircut, pick up sushi, watch Bravo, and sleep in!!!!!!!
+ 1,000,000
Anonymous
05/05/2014 22:05
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
"listens to whatever his mother says (he comes home saying DS is a brat and not SN etc...), "
Well it IS pretty annoying that every other kid is considered SN these days. It's way overdone.
Well it IS pretty annoying that every other kid is considered SN these days. It's way overdone.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 21:46
Subject: Re:Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Anonymous wrote:For all the jealous ones, you probably have normal MILs. My MIL never follows any requests or directions, brushes of all my concerns, and insists to being left alone with kids. She also startles in panic, so instead of acting quick when my toddler is doing something dangerous, she freezes and loudly screams in horror. She does not drive (she won't be able to go to ER if God forbid it will be needed), does not believe in doctors, does not believe in chocking hazards, etc. I do send my DH over with kids, but avoid going myself. I would never in a million years leave this woman with my children alone for more than 3 hours, although she demands to have my toddlers stay with her for weekends or even weeks.
The question isn't about leaving the child with the mother in law, it is about leaving the child with the child's own father!
Anonymous
05/05/2014 21:45
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Why would you have a child with someone who you can't trust to be around your child without supervision. I hope you take some responsibilities for your stupid decision. Now that you made the bed though, you have to lie in it.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 21:22
Subject: Re:Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
For all the jealous ones, you probably have normal MILs. My MIL never follows any requests or directions, brushes of all my concerns, and insists to being left alone with kids. She also startles in panic, so instead of acting quick when my toddler is doing something dangerous, she freezes and loudly screams in horror. She does not drive (she won't be able to go to ER if God forbid it will be needed), does not believe in doctors, does not believe in chocking hazards, etc. I do send my DH over with kids, but avoid going myself. I would never in a million years leave this woman with my children alone for more than 3 hours, although she demands to have my toddlers stay with her for weekends or even weeks.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 17:09
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
OP, i hear what you're saying and I empathize with you.
I would let him go but keep him on a string.
Write a list of what he has to do and when. And then, text him to remind him. It sounds harsh, but it sounds like he needs it and then you could get a break. Those w/o SN kids seem to not understand what you're going through. I know from my sister with a Down's child how much extra time and energy has to go into SN.
I would let him go but keep him on a string.
Write a list of what he has to do and when. And then, text him to remind him. It sounds harsh, but it sounds like he needs it and then you could get a break. Those w/o SN kids seem to not understand what you're going through. I know from my sister with a Down's child how much extra time and energy has to go into SN.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 16:53
Subject: Re:Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Honestly if my DH asked to take the kids to his mothers house for the weekend I would cry in happiness. Then I would get my haircut, pick up sushi, watch Bravo, and sleep in!!!!!!!
Did I write this?
I would be SO HAPPY if my husband took the kids by himself to visit my in laws. Then, not only would I avoid spending time with them, but I would also have some time at home alone. WIN - WIN!
This x 1,000. I keep telling my husband I want them to go away for Mother's Day and leave me in glorious solitude but he thinks I'm kidding.
I was alone this weekend while my family was with the in laws. I watched ALL THE THINGS on Netflix. I ate ALL THE SNACKS. OMG. Amazing.
OP - srsly. Leave your husband to it.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 16:45
Subject: Re:Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Honestly if my DH asked to take the kids to his mothers house for the weekend I would cry in happiness. Then I would get my haircut, pick up sushi, watch Bravo, and sleep in!!!!!!!
Did I write this?
I would be SO HAPPY if my husband took the kids by himself to visit my in laws. Then, not only would I avoid spending time with them, but I would also have some time at home alone. WIN - WIN!
This x 1,000. I keep telling my husband I want them to go away for Mother's Day and leave me in glorious solitude but he thinks I'm kidding.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 16:42
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Anonymous wrote:I don't understand how you married and stay married to a man that you don't trust at all.
Cut the apron strings. I bet your DH is way more able than you give him credit for. How will he ever learn if you hover non stop like this?
+1 billion.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 16:40
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
OP,
I would certainly be OK with my husband taking DCs to my in-laws (I don't need to 'let' him do anything - I am his wife, not his mother). In fact, we've left our DCs with our in-laws before.
HOWEVER, I do not have an abusive mother-in-law who would insult a SN kid and feed the other kid food she is allergic to, nor do I have a husband who would let her do it.
So in your circumstances - no way! Your problem isn't your MIL though - it's the fact that your husband seems incapable of caring or standing up for his own children. Your MIL you don't have to see much. Your husband you are stuck with. You need to fix it, OP, before it gets worse.
I would certainly be OK with my husband taking DCs to my in-laws (I don't need to 'let' him do anything - I am his wife, not his mother). In fact, we've left our DCs with our in-laws before.
HOWEVER, I do not have an abusive mother-in-law who would insult a SN kid and feed the other kid food she is allergic to, nor do I have a husband who would let her do it.
So in your circumstances - no way! Your problem isn't your MIL though - it's the fact that your husband seems incapable of caring or standing up for his own children. Your MIL you don't have to see much. Your husband you are stuck with. You need to fix it, OP, before it gets worse.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 14:40
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
OP, will your DH take my kids instead?
Anonymous
05/05/2014 14:39
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Actually, the ILs would be thrilled to have just them and not you. Make them happy in their old age! As a matter of fact send them a day early to give you an extra day to decompress, and you will start the realize this junk you put out as critical - is just junk.
Anonymous
05/05/2014 14:26
Subject: Re:Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Anonymous wrote:Honestly if my DH asked to take the kids to his mothers house for the weekend I would cry in happiness. Then I would get my haircut, pick up sushi, watch Bravo, and sleep in!!!!!!!
Did I write this?
I would be SO HAPPY if my husband took the kids by himself to visit my in laws. Then, not only would I avoid spending time with them, but I would also have some time at home alone. WIN - WIN!
Anonymous
05/05/2014 14:24
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
And yet you had more than one child with this man....
Anonymous
05/05/2014 14:13
Subject: Do you let your spouse take your DC's to visit IL's alone?
Normally, I would cringe at the language of "letting" my husband take the kids somewhere. But it sounds like you may have legitimate concerns over whether your child will be safe. If your husband does not take your child's allergies seriously, then you have a bigger problem than visiting his mother.