Anonymous wrote:Just ignore her and say "mhm" to everything, but dont be scared of her or anything shes the annoying person and u gotta do something to make it stop

Anonymous wrote: And buying stuff to leave in your house? Yeah, this is the step mom version of leaving something behind at your boyfriend's house so you have an excuse to come back.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell your dad that you plan to stand up for yourself and to stop giving in to her passive aggressive manipulation. If you are traveling somewhere and she wants you to open the door for her, then get in the driver's seat, start the car, roll down the window and ask her to step into the car because you're waiting for her to get in. If she tries to make you open the door, let her know that it is her decision, but you plan to drive in 30 seconds with or without her. If she makes backhanded comments to your children such as "Tell Mommy that she is feeding you wrong." Just look at her and tell her that she should stop confusing your son with her quaint (or strange) ideas. I will sometimes look at a person and say "I'm sorry, but that's not how we're raising our son. Please don't confuse him. Tommy just remember how we do things at home." For the glasses that she brought to your house, leave them on the counter when they come to visit and when she asks about them, tell her that there wasn't room for them in the freezer and she should feel free to use your chilled glasses and that she's welcome to take hers home with her. Don't shop for the steaks and if she asks about them, tell her that you just didn't have time to shop since you have a young child, but if she didn't have time to prepare anything, you all can go out for dinner.

Start treating her like a 3 year old who is testing your limits. Put firm boundaries in place and follow through. Give her only choices that you want and do not offer her other options. She only has as much control (especially in your house and with your child) as you let her.

+1 lock the thread! No need for anyone else to post because this here is the answer. Print this out, post it on your mirror and carry it in your purse. Excellent PP!

Anonymous wrote:Let's take this one at a time:

-- The beer glass. I don't see this as her telling you your glasses aren't good enough. She wants to drink her beer out of a specific glass. So what? Big deal.

-- Ditto the car door thing. Okay, she's a princess. That doesn't affect you.

-- On the other hand, with her commenting on your parenting, you have every right to be annoyed. I would respond every time she does it. "Linda, we have this." Don't say anything else.

-- The steak thing, it sounds like she knows you don't like the way your dad fixes steak, so she's offering to let you bring your own and cook it the way you like for yourselves...not for her. If you don't want to take her up on the offer, don't.

You don't like the woman. We get it. But pick your battles.

Gambit wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Start treating her like a 3 year old who is testing your limits. Put firm boundaries in place and follow through. Give her only choices that you want and do not offer her other options. She only has as much control (especially in your house and with your child) as you let her.

+1 lock the thread! No need for anyone else to post because this here is the answer. Print this out, post it on your mirror and carry it in your purse. Excellent PP!

To clarify. I’m not a woman, I don’t have a purse. Not sure DW would take to kindly to me wearing women’s apparel. :-p

You are right. I need to start setting some boundaries.
To answer other responses. There’s more I just pointed out the things that were getting to me lately.

The thing with the car door, I didn’t care when it was my dad opening her door. I would even open it on occasion when his hands are full and she just sitting there useless.
It only bothered me when she and I went somewhere, and she expecting the same princess treatment from me.

The reason why all of this has come to a head is because I finally realized that she’s getting increasingly pushy about her entitlement.
Before DW and I moved to NY, my dad gave us a waffle iron as a present. It wasn’t until recently that she actually said, I made sure he got you guys the waffle iron that I wanted you to have, for the type of waffles I like.

A few months back, when they came down for a visit, they left behind two bath robes in the guest room closet.
Then it’s the Beer glasses she wants me to store in my freezer for her. Never mind the fact that my pint glasses are the exact same size and shape.
And then then the steak thing was just over the top.

To answer someone else’s response about how since we didn’t like the way she cooked steak, she offered for us to season it the way we like it.
No that was not the case. They never cook dinner for us. We always order out when we go there. She loves the way DW makes steak. She pan sears the steak with a special sauce she makes and it’s awesome. So SM loves the way DW makes the steak. DW gave her the recipe, but we never asked them to make steak for us when we visit. She called and asked us to buy, pre-marinade, and freeze the steaks to bring up with us to cook for them when we got to her house! Again I say WTF?!?

Oh and no, she does not have kids of her own. So maybe she is secretly jealous about not being married and never having had kids. I don’t even care about that. I always knew she was a but pushy and entitled, but It never effected me, so I ignored it. I only care now because she’s saying and doing things that directly effect me. And with each incident, she’s escalating. I feel it’s time to put a stop to things before they escalate out of hand. That’s always my logical advice to people.
Don’t let little annoyances add up to the point where you’re unreasonably blowing up at someone over something minor. Take them aside and let them know so that maybe the little annoyances can cease. and not become major problems.

Anonymous wrote:Tell your dad that you plan to stand up for yourself and to stop giving in to her passive aggressive manipulation. If you are traveling somewhere and she wants you to open the door for her, then get in the driver's seat, start the car, roll down the window and ask her to step into the car because you're waiting for her to get in. If she tries to make you open the door, let her know that it is her decision, but you plan to drive in 30 seconds with or without her. If she makes backhanded comments to your children such as "Tell Mommy that she is feeding you wrong." Just look at her and tell her that she should stop confusing your son with her quaint (or strange) ideas. I will sometimes look at a person and say "I'm sorry, but that's not how we're raising our son. Please don't confuse him. Tommy just remember how we do things at home." For the glasses that she brought to your house, leave them on the counter when they come to visit and when she asks about them, tell her that there wasn't room for them in the freezer and she should feel free to use your chilled glasses and that she's welcome to take hers home with her. Don't shop for the steaks and if she asks about them, tell her that you just didn't have time to shop since you have a young child, but if she didn't have time to prepare anything, you all can go out for dinner.

Start treating her like a 3 year old who is testing your limits. Put firm boundaries in place and follow through. Give her only choices that you want and do not offer her other options. She only has as much control (especially in your house and with your child) as you let her.