Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They will come out once for a housewarming party. They may come out for major events. These are not people that you will see on a weekly or monthly basis anymore unless you drive into DC.

This. We made this move to Arlington two years ago. We still see the party-oriented friends--we make an effort to come to their DC parties, they make an effort to come to ours. But what it really did was strengthen my friendships with VA people who it's now much easier to see, and open me up ththe world of people who made the move in previous years and are now my neighbors. Look for neighborhoods that have listservs, associations, elementary schools, babysitting co-ops. Mine in S. Arlington has all that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP - thanks, all! What I want to know is how I can find a house on a street with young families and block parties and great new friends like a couple of the PPs. Either of you want to post your neighborhood? And the PP who said that I'll still see the good friends and the peripheral ones will fade is wise and I'm sure that's true. It just seems like such a massive change that I'm not sure I'm ready for yet. But I know I need to do it in the near future.

Are you all happier in your new houses with space and a yard? Any regrets?

SFH neighborhoods in walkable areas tend to attract social people. Higher density causes more interaction. Throw in a good public school and it will be teeming with families that wanted a little more yard than a rowhouse provides.

We were thrilled with our new house and yard (not too big that yardwork isn't a big deal). Kids go to the park a lot. Having a place where guests could park (I still need to give them parking hangers) but they aren't circling around the neighborhood for a 1/2 hour looking for a spot--is fabulous.

We have more to walk to now than I did before and I was in an active part of NW. Metro and all amenities (gyms, grocerys, bars, restaurants, parks, movie theather, drycleaners, coffee shops, some retail, hair salons, oil changes (means a lot when you can walk home after dropping it off), dentist, nail salons, massage center, etc., etc. are all within a few blocks...yet the neighborhood itself manages to retain some of suburbia.

Not the OP but what neighborhood is this? Do people have recs for good close-in neighborhoods that are friendly and social?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op-- we moved to a close-in, walkable neighborhood.

Now- i don't want to drive or metro anywhere. It is just so convenient (especially when you are drinking) to keep it local.

You may find that YOU are the one that changes. You might find that going into the city seems like a hassle and be just like the people that find coming into VA a hassle.

I now think of going 10-15 miles---as a long trip. I hate getting in my car.

That said--for good friends--we BOTH take the hit. One of the benefits of my move is I now have a great spare bedroom off a rec room that dc friends and family have been known to crash and then do brunch in the morning.

You can't build your life around others because one day they may decide to up and move.

What happened during your childhood that you hate cars? Cars not inanimate objects. You should seek help for that fear.

I was stuck in the fucking suburbs and bored off my ass.

Anonymous wrote:We still see our friends on Dc often, and they come out to us. But we are close by in Bethesda. We don't cross bridges to Va nearly as often.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's my story - have lived in DC almost ten years, all of it in Dupont Circle. DH and I both are at work in under 30 minutes. We now have 2 kids, one in a good public elementary school, one not in school yet. We are currently renting a "big enough" apartment and really like DC's school but it's not what I want forever. I can't afford a house in my current neighborhood and probably wouldn't want one because our middle school and high school options are bad and we can't afford/aren't interested in private school. What I want is a nice, normal house with a yard in a good neighborhood with good public schools that does not give me or DH a long commute (both downtown). That's probably not doable on my budget ($800,000ish).

So, that means I probably have to go to the close in suburbs, maybe even farther out ones. Here's my big concern - do I have to completely remake my social life? Most of my friends live in the district - Chevy Chase DC is about as far as anyone is from me. Several on Capitol Hill. Have tons of friends in my neighborhood and love going out to dinner with them (am in walking distance to all the restaurants on 14th street). DH has more friends in the burbs than I do but most of them are in Virginia and when I go out there, it seems far. My DC friends all complain about having to leave the district for anything.

I am honestly not trying to start a war about whether DC, MD, or VA is better - I just want to hear from people who have left DC about whether they had to make all new friends in the new location, whether MD or VA. Thanks.

This was just us a year ago and in general I will say yes, you basically do. At least for the "see them once or more a week" kind of friends. Not even because DC people "don't want to come to the burbs" (though you'll find some of that) but because, other than weekends, it's just not really practical. Especially if said friends work in the District like most of ours do -- either I have pick up my kids in VA and then make my way to the city or they're doing the reverse (with rush hour traffic mind you). And as kids get older and have more commitments on the weekends it's even less feasible. One of the ways we often saw our friends was because of sports practice and games, when you move you'll be on different teams so you don't even have that (but can with new friends).

It's a little sad and not what you were looking to hear I'm sure but it has been our experience. And we were in DC longer than you (FWIW). It's not that we aren't friends with our DC friends anymore, it's just that we only see them occasionally. Life takes over, it happens.

Anonymous wrote:They will come out once for a housewarming party. They may come out for major events. These are not people that you will see on a weekly or monthly basis anymore unless you drive into DC.