You're being melodramatic, OP. Your husband can't get bronchitis from shoveling snow and feeding leftover spinach pie to the dogs is hardly an unforgivable sin.

You don't like him, you don't respect him, and you are looking for "legitimate" reasons to feel the way you do. Give it up. Just don't celebrate the holidays with him or see him. You have no real reason for this action, but if that's how you feel, act on it and let it go. You are no victim and you don't need to act like one.

The other interesting that he did today is he called my son my nephew's name. There is a three year age difference between them and he only has 3 grandchildren. He wanted to take a picture of my nephew thinking he was my son and when my son corrected his name, my dad stopped trying to take a picture of my son and went to take a picture of the nephew. My son is twice the size of my nephew .

So today's fun feast was that they brought their two dogs to the relative hosting Christmas uninvited. Their two dogs got into a fight with my relatives' s very peaceful dog. They also held the dogs at the dining room table while they were eating. The host insisted that I sit with them for Christmas dinner. There were multiple tables and she said asked me to be the good sport and I was.

You are getting way too worked up about this stuff. Not making a treasured family recipe because he fed the LEFTOVERS to a dog? I mean, it's the leftovers. It's not like your kids didn't get any because he fed it to Fido.

I get crazy in-laws, I do. Trust me. But don't let him take away your special family traditions. If it bothers you, get up and put the effing spinach pie leftovers in the fridge before he can feed them to the dog. Wrap them in foil and label it "liver." Problem solved. DON'T LET THE TERRORISTS WIN.

Do you ever say anything to them about their behavior???
Plus limit ur interaction

Yep kids pick up on this and will model.

He is an ass. Just stop taking the shit from him. Stop the gift exchange, do not invite him to events, and if he does something to to piss you off say so and leave or tell him to leave. Life is way too short.

Anonymous wrote: I try to stay away as much as possible but I can't at Christmas unless I want to be rude. More fodder of why I dread them. I've watched their dogs for a week or two at time while they went on vacation several times. The first time they brought back nothing to thank us. The second time, they asked if I would like something and I asked for tshirts for the kids. When they returned they had nothing for the kids because it wasn't a shopping trip.

It's not that you don't want to be rude, it's that you cling to the belief that he must really love you after all and this holiday he will prove it. It's not going to happen.

Thanks everyone. I love the support on this thread which has given me more confidence. I feel guilty for feeling the way I do and am embarrassed that I can't have a normal relationship with him. I feel like I shouldn't expect anything from my dad as I am an adult and his behaviors while juvenile should be forgiven but I can't. I feel that cutting him off completely would be worse than tolerating his ridiculousness. Most of the time I can laugh about it until I want to cry. Maybe, I'll have another "funny" story to add today.

To the PP who said I should slam the door and say we don't want any...they can get away with it...but if I tried it would be beyond rude and they would go even further to try to humiliate me.