Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys, I think you need to dial back the outrage about the husband. It's perfectly reasonable for the DH to be mad. OP didn't say the DH was screaming at the 3 year old. I imagine she set up the kids in with activities and they had a gritted teeth discussion in the kitchen in which DH expressed his completely natural anger and frustration at this situation.

As, OP pointed out, it calls into question how child care arrangements are handled when her child is over with the dad. You can feel both sorry for the 3 year old AND angry at the loser dad at the same time.

Thank you! Op here. My husband was not home at the time, I was on the phone with him when the door bell rang, so he knew what was going on. The first thing he asked was if the kids were okay. Then he got furious with my ex, especially for the fact that he's likely pulling this kind of thing when my child is with him. Just like some of the pps, he was afraid of the implications of me having a child in my house under these circumstances and wanted me to call the non-emergency police number.
I know some of you are trying to make this about his 3 year old. Trust me, the child was fine, well treated and had fun while here.
This is not what this is about. This is about my ex having the balls of dropping these kids off when visitation with my child is already on rocky terms and we don't have a friendly relationship at all (mostly because he's crazy and unreliable.) the visitation weekend he had before this was canceled by him, like many others.
The one before that he was threatening to come by with the police just because I said I didn't think it was a good idea for my child to go that weekend, things were very bad with the anxiety issues and I thought it would make it worse, so I suggested visitation taking place around my house (he lives 2h away.)
So all things considered, I think my husband had a very normal reaction and those of you that think he would be mistreating a child because he was furious at what my ex did are a little out of line. I was fuming and that child will never know.
On the lawyer, I got an out of the office auto email reply saying she'll be back tomorrow. We'll see.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you know for certain this is your ex's child? Even if you do, if the mother did not consent to this, it could constitute kidnapping. OP it sounds like you just don't have enough info to assume this all legit (but annoying). I think you absolutely have to have CPS. You're putting yourself in a very dangerous situation by not reporting it.

When a parent has custody or visitation, they can take their child where they want, and leave it with whom they want, and it's not kidnapping. The other parent does not need to consent. In this circumstance it's not OK, and it might constitute negligence given that the father didn't seem to ask permission to leave the child, or even watch to make sure an adult was home, but it's not kidnapping.

Anonymous wrote:How many bastards does your Baby Daddy have? Sheesh!

Anonymous wrote:Guys, I think you need to dial back the outrage about the husband. It's perfectly reasonable for the DH to be mad. OP didn't say the DH was screaming at the 3 year old. I imagine she set up the kids in with activities and they had a gritted teeth discussion in the kitchen in which DH expressed his completely natural anger and frustration at this situation.

As, OP pointed out, it calls into question how child care arrangements are handled when her child is over with the dad. You can feel both sorry for the 3 year old AND angry at the loser dad at the same time.

Anonymous wrote:I have a child from a previous relationship who lives with me, sole physical custody. Her dad has visitation every other week and we share legal custody. He is very inconsistent in his visitation pattern and his contact with my kid, in my opinion, it'snot to the benefit of my child, for many reasons.
Today he came by to bring her back after visitation and he dropped off his 3 year old too. I opened the door to find the two kids there, he yells from the car that he'll be back and drives off.
I don't know this kid and vice versa. I tried calling and he just said he's giving them time to play at my house. (Without asking me first.)
My husband is furious and wants the kid out. I want to scream.