OP: I don't care about money. I don't need his money. I just want to divorce him.

I don't want to spend all of my funds to fight in court. What's the point for spending 100K in lawyers fee to get 1K a month in child support?

I just wish people will stop throwing stones at me. Okay maybe I will stay married to him then. I am sick of people who tell me how they love my child but do not want to get involved in my divorce. People who care get involved. That's fine. I am a monster. I don't deserve any help. I am a shitty person. I am the lowest piece of crap. okay okay i get it.

different, not difficult.

Seems your lawyer's expecting a $350 quickie divorce and your ex is acting in a manner worthy of a mega-fight (cashing out assets, isn't that voluntary impoverishment??)

Get to a women's center soon, please, or a difficult lawyer.

You may have your flaws and be difficult to live with (I'm guessing you want nothing to do with anyone who's not Asian from back home and who can't help your kid get into TJ), but your ex is clearly not acting in good faith.

OP: I am in Virginia.

I do need friends but I am just so sick sick sick of people at this point.

What state are you in that you need a witness who knows you both? Get a better lawyer and some friends.

You need to get a better lawyer. He is not allowed to cash out the 529 plan or whatever other college savings plan you have. You need to talk to him. If he doesn't care about the divorce then you need to talk to your lawyer about how to proceed.

OP: Thanks 09:21. I really don't think people get it. You sum it up perfectly.

My family would have done it for me in a heart beat. They can't even though they really want to help.

I feel for you op. I am not from here, all our friends were his friends, all our family were his family.
I hated to ask anyone because everyone works and I hated to impose and make them take a day off work. The friend who finally did it works from home.

I never felt so alone and uncared for in my life as when I could not find a friend to go to court with me to help me get out of an abusive marriage. Thank god for the guy who did it. I sent him a nice card after....

OP: Thanks everyone. I do admit I suck at making friends. I do have friends but not many people know both of us. The witness do need to know both of us and there are limited people that do.

He is not contesting the divorce. He can simply care less. I don't want to ask him for many reasons. What's more, since I file first I am the plaintiff and all the witness questions are related how well the witness know me, not him.

I enjoy being alone and I find socializing exhausting. I do not hang out with couple friends even when we were married because I do not enjoy going out with my ex. It is not a crime right?

My ex has spent my child's college savings on strip clubs. He's cashing 401k to go to Las Vegas. He spends every night in the local clubs and bars and somehow I am the evil monster.

I work full time. I take care of my child all by myself financially, physically, and in every way shape or form. My crime is that I do not have a social life. I do not have a close relationship with anyone really that I feel I can impose this on them. I am the type who would rather walk a mile after surgery than asking for help. I don't think I deserve the flame.

I grew up in Asia and my real friends are there. I have no family here except my child. It's hard enough to be a single mom. I just want to divorce him because he's racking up serious debt and I am very worried it may affect me. Where are we supposed to live if we lose the house?

I do have a lawyer but a witness is required by law. I never thought the hardest part is finding a witness. They don't have to take sides. Just confirm basic facts. That is all.

What makes me mad is that this person sent me an email telling me that he loves my child like his own. Give me a break. He does not get to be the nice guy. He is telling me that he never asks about my child's home life when my kid's dad lives at his house for 3 years?

I think you guys that are saying mean things should back off. Remember this is supposed to be a support group for parents. The OP is upset, just stop criticizing her.

OP, can you ask a neighbor? A neighbor that sees you coming and going would know that your spouse hasn't been living there.

TROLL

OP, if you have used a lawyer for this process, you really need to talk to them and get them to suggest a way of working this out.

I'm not remembering all of the details of your earlier posting, but is your husband contesting the divorce? That the only way I can think this is still an issue.

Being a witness has nothing to do with taking sides, or saying anything bad about one person or the other. It it simply confirming that you have met the conditions (i.e. not living together).

On a completely different note, you need to work on developing a social network here. You are seeing the difficulties that arise when you isolate yourself. Things come up and you need someone to call. What if you had an emergency with your daughter (not 911 type, but some other crisis) and you have no one to lend a hand? You don't need to reinvent your personality and go from introvert to extrovert, but you need make connections with people locally. Church, clubs, daughter's school, are all places where you can meet other moms.

I already responded, but I really want to reiterate that what you are doing is absolutely wrong. You should not be asking his relatives. They are not your friends, they are his relatives. You are divorcing, they are on his side, stop trying to change that. It just puts them in an awful position and makes you look like a moron. Find someone, anyone, who knows that you have not lived with him for the past year, and ask them to be a witness. And, most importantly, learn how to treat people and get some friends.

Doesn't he want to get divorced? Why doesn't he ask someone? Why would you ask his sisters boyfriend? Do you really think the live-in boyfriend is going to go against his girlfriend for you? What does your lawyer say? You need to talk to your husband and see what the delay is. Can your lawyer talk to his lawyer?

Anonymous wrote:OP: maybe hard to believe but all the people that know both of us are his relatives. Mine lives overseas. Do you think I enjoy asking them?

Use someone that just knows you. Stop asking his family to be a witness against him; it is just wrong.