Anonymous wrote:You address friends by their first names. Teachers are not your friends and should not be treated as such. Keep the relationship professional by addressing him/her as'mr., mrs., miss' etc

+1- "Sarah" PP

I would not like it. I address parents as Mr. / Ms. whatever. Also, many of them would not know my first name. Students don't even know it until midway through the year, when they see some official roster.

I am very young and really not serious/uptight at all- but I do believe in this formality. I think because of my age actually I try to be more formal in some ways. At my school, many students attend PT conferences with their parents, so it weird be weird if they called me Sarah and not Ms. Jane in front of their kids.

I've always referred to my kids' teachers by their first names (while referring to them in front of my kids by Ms. XYZ.) And I always sign letters/notes to them with my (and DHs) first names. I am not trying to be BFFs, but since we are both adults, I find it acceptable.

There is an old school culture in DC where people are still referred to as Ms. XYZ to each other. I get e-mails and calls daily referencing me as Ms. XYZ and it doesn't stop until I outright say, "Please call me (first name.)" And this is among peers at other agencies. It is a DC thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr, Ms, Mrs, keeps it professional regardless of age.

But these titles are rarely used between adults in a professional setting these days, especially after the first meeting.

They are the professionals who teacher your children. They are not your BFFs or your colleagues at the office. We've been going to the same pediatrician for several years. I've never call our doctor by her first name. Why would I call teachers by their first names?? Only if they absolutely insisted.

I am a teacher, and I certainly wouldn't "insist" that a parent call me by my first name. But I think that the idea that using first names somehow implies that we are "BFFs" is silly. I think it's perfectly fine for adults to call each other by their first names.

Anonymous wrote:DS attends a first name school, and I love it. At orientation way back when he started K, it was explained that it was customary at the school to use first names because respect is generated by one's behavior and the mutual recognition of the other's humanity. I thought that was beautiful.

Everything I've ever seen at the school confirms this.

I also appreciate what the pp said about her high school teachers being warmly regarded and understood as full, complex individuals.

I don't understand how calling somebody "Mr./Ms. Lastname" instead of "Firstname" would impede regarding them warmly and understanding them as full, complex individuals, let alone recognizing their humanity.

DS attends a first name school, and I love it. At orientation way back when he started K, it was explained that it was customary at the school to use first names because respect is generated by one's behavior and the mutual recognition of the other's humanity. I thought that was beautiful.

Everything I've ever seen at the school confirms this.

I also appreciate what the pp said about her high school teachers being warmly regarded and understood as full, complex individuals.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr, Ms, Mrs, keeps it professional regardless of age.

But these titles are rarely used between adults in a professional setting these days, especially after the first meeting.

They are the professionals who teacher your children. They are not your BFFs or your colleagues at the office. We've been going to the same pediatrician for several years. I've never call our doctor by her first name. Why would I call teachers by their first names?? Only if they absolutely insisted.

Well said +1

No it wasn't. What do you call your lawyer? Your accountant? Your financial advisor? These are all professionals.

Anonymous wrote:I am a teacher and yes, I do mind, especially if I am still teaching your child. We can go on a first year basis after I am done teaching him/her. Otherwise, it just sends the wrong message.

What message is that?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr, Ms, Mrs, keeps it professional regardless of age.

But these titles are rarely used between adults in a professional setting these days, especially after the first meeting.

They are the professionals who teacher your children. They are not your BFFs or your colleagues at the office. We've been going to the same pediatrician for several years. I've never call our doctor by her first name. Why would I call teachers by their first names?? Only if they absolutely insisted.

Well said +1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr, Ms, Mrs, keeps it professional regardless of age.

But these titles are rarely used between adults in a professional setting these days, especially after the first meeting.

They are the professionals who teacher your children. They are not your BFFs or your colleagues at the office. We've been going to the same pediatrician for several years. I've never call our doctor by her first name. Why would I call teachers by their first names?? Only if they absolutely insisted.

My child's preschool uses honorific and first name. Ms Mary, Mr John.

In front of the kids we always say Ms Mary and they always call me Mrs Smith

When the kids aren't around, it is first names only.

This is a no-brainer. Call them Ms. or Mr. until invited to do otherwise.

Anonymous wrote:It seems like most professions are first-name-only now. The one exception I've seen is that many doctors seem to get annoyed with me when I call them by their first names rather than "Doctor ____."

Although I must say that I call my child's pediatrician by her first name, and she calls me by my first name. My child calls the doctor "Dr _____." I would prefer the same for teachers/school administrators--adults call adults by their first names, and kids can call them by the more formal Mr/Ms _____.

It seems like most professions are first-name-only now. The one exception I've seen is that many doctors seem to get annoyed with me when I call them by their first names rather than "Doctor ____."

Anonymous wrote:Used to be at a first name only school--for everyone. Hated it. I don't think kids should call teachers and parents my their first names.

I attended a (private) first-name high school. I was so much closer to my teachers at that school than when I attended public high school prior to switching. My teachers became people, with real lives and problems.

My social studies teacher was Arlene. I can tell you all about her daughter, but can also tell you I learned so much about the government structure from Arlene.
My biology and botany teacher was Laura, my gym teacher was Eileen, my English teacher was Shari (FB friend now), my principal was Kevin (who was my health teacher before that).

When I think of them it's warmly, and I think of them as whole people, with all the complexities people have. I had MORE respect for them, because I could say "Hey Laura, I am not getting this."