Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are right- I want the flexibility of staying home while not wanting my lifestyle to drastically change. We are going to "live off" DH's salary through the remainder of 2013, minus the expenses we'd give up if I stay home. To be perfectly honest, I'm not interested in a career. I have a communications degree from a school you've probably never heard of (now comprised of mostly spoiled rich kids from the DMV) and wound up with a security clearance and job with the feds that pays me nearly 6 figures to be a glorified secretary. I'm not using my brain and cry each and every Sunday because I just want to hang out with my daughter instead of phoning it in at this silly job. I have a great 20 minute commute, nice coworkers and because the job doesn't require a rocket scientist, time to peruse message boards. I GET that it's not that bad. But at the end of the day, it IS that bad. Why pay someone else $2500 a month to raise my child when I think I'm pretty capable of doing it myself? I guess when I put it that way, I don't really need those "extras" as much as I think I do.

For the love of god and my sanity (or someone like me) PLEASE quit NOW and help your coworkers replace you with someone who WANTS to be there and do a good job!! I'm so frustrated with whiny women at work that can't get their shit together and would rather be home. I have absolutely no sympathy and you are just in the way. If you make near 6 figures than I guarantee you are expected to be more than a glorified secretary, but you have turned your job into that. Awesome way to spend the tax payers money!

OP here-

There's a difference between not wanting to work and still going to work and doing a good job. Because I work in federal CONTRACTING (with a HIGH LEVEL CLEARANCE) ...I make a pretty decent living to ANSWER PHONES. Create excel calendars. All that awesome secretary work. This morning, I even get to print out posters on plotters and then hang them up. And as for wasting your hard earned tax payers money, let me tell you- the agency I work for doesn't hesitate to cut the fat. In this fiscal enviornment, it's put up or shut up... and it's MUCH easier to get rid of a contractor who's not pulling their weight vice a government employee who has to go through rounds of employment improvement plans, mentoring, etc. On any given day, you can bet your snarky ass that we're doing more work then our government counterparts. That's not the issue here. Just because staying at home is not for you (thank God for your kids!!!- and not just because you want them to see that "Mommies use more of their brains then just doing your laundry") doesn't mean that there aren't hard working, ambitious people out there who have fallen into a job path they don't like and are trying to find a way to make it work for them to do something that they personally feel will be more rewarding for them. I'm sure there are people who would KILL to sit at my desk, answering phones for a LOT of money. I came on this board to see how other people have transferred from two fairly large incomes to a one income house... not to listen to your BS about how I'm whiny at work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are right- I want the flexibility of staying home while not wanting my lifestyle to drastically change. We are going to "live off" DH's salary through the remainder of 2013, minus the expenses we'd give up if I stay home. To be perfectly honest, I'm not interested in a career. I have a communications degree from a school you've probably never heard of (now comprised of mostly spoiled rich kids from the DMV) and wound up with a security clearance and job with the feds that pays me nearly 6 figures to be a glorified secretary. I'm not using my brain and cry each and every Sunday because I just want to hang out with my daughter instead of phoning it in at this silly job. I have a great 20 minute commute, nice coworkers and because the job doesn't require a rocket scientist, time to peruse message boards. I GET that it's not that bad. But at the end of the day, it IS that bad. Why pay someone else $2500 a month to raise my child when I think I'm pretty capable of doing it myself? I guess when I put it that way, I don't really need those "extras" as much as I think I do.

$2500? Shit! Can I hire your nanny??

Is 2500 supposed to be a lot? We pay 1700 a month for a terrific nanny.

Anonymous wrote:I am able to stay home because I started freelancing (writing, copywriting)-- I've been doing it for almost 6 years now. Very happy.

But how much can you possibly make?

I worked PT until this year. Now I'm FT again. However, when I worked PT, I also took on consulting work as a favor to a pal. For every project, I get paid $20K, which is a good chunk but it takes months to see that money, as it's received after the stamp of approval is given.

And when I was an editor, even FT pay was crap.

How do people bring in good money freelancing? I would find it hard to cut my salary by $80K if I only consulted.

For as much shit as teachers get on these boards, I am only TOO happy to have my job.

We share a nanny who does before care for us and after care for pals.

And while I work summer days (as resource), it's rare that I put in a 9-5 day.

You might want to look into that, OP, as even PT in some of the larger systems offers good hours and great benefits.

And as a woman in this economy, I would NOT give up my career. It's too risky.

I suggest you try to make it work b/c there's always the chance that something catastrophic could happen. Husbands lose jobs. Marriages break up. Spouses become ill.

Shit happens . . . And you don't want to make yourself vulnerable.

Anonymous wrote:You all are right- I want the flexibility of staying home while not wanting my lifestyle to drastically change. We are going to "live off" DH's salary through the remainder of 2013, minus the expenses we'd give up if I stay home. To be perfectly honest, I'm not interested in a career. I have a communications degree from a school you've probably never heard of (now comprised of mostly spoiled rich kids from the DMV) and wound up with a security clearance and job with the feds that pays me nearly 6 figures to be a glorified secretary. I'm not using my brain and cry each and every Sunday because I just want to hang out with my daughter instead of phoning it in at this silly job. I have a great 20 minute commute, nice coworkers and because the job doesn't require a rocket scientist, time to peruse message boards. I GET that it's not that bad. But at the end of the day, it IS that bad. Why pay someone else $2500 a month to raise my child when I think I'm pretty capable of doing it myself? I guess when I put it that way, I don't really need those "extras" as much as I think I do.

For the love of god and my sanity (or someone like me) PLEASE quit NOW and help your coworkers replace you with someone who WANTS to be there and do a good job!! I'm so frustrated with whiny women at work that can't get their shit together and would rather be home. I have absolutely no sympathy and you are just in the way. If you make near 6 figures than I guarantee you are expected to be more than a glorified secretary, but you have turned your job into that. Awesome way to spend the tax payers money!

There are lots of jobs or businesses you could start. If you want to be with your kid it is not going to change. This is the wrong board for the type of answers you are looking for. People on here lack creativity, couldn't think their way out of a paper bag, and essentially treat their kids like accessories.

I have experienced good times, been through tight times, and turned down lucrative offers. That is life. Being with my kids is more important than a career. That hasn't changed, and it is not going to. I have always worked from home and I always will. There isn't an amount you could pay me to go into an office at this point in my life.

I am able to stay home because I started freelancing (writing, copywriting)-- I've been doing it for almost 6 years now. Very happy.

Anonymous wrote:PP- out of DC area completely or to a further suburb? What's your husband's commute like (when he's not traveling, but heading into the office?)

Out of the DC area. It was a choice we struggled with because we do like DC. The income to housing ratio we felt was just too high when we crunched the numbers for the 20 years to raise kids in DC versus elsewhere. I am not saying this choice is for you but just to let you know we all struggle with compromise. For us, it has worked out great financially and for our family life. Good luck!

PP- out of DC area completely or to a further suburb? What's your husband's commute like (when he's not traveling, but heading into the office?)

We have 3 DC and we moved out of DC to a midsized more affordable city. All things being equal it was the cost of housing in DC that was controlling what choices we had. Everything else about DC was great but we just wanted to not both be slaves to our jobs just to afford the housing. So we moved and bought a small 1700 square foot house in a smaller city with a very small mortgage. Having a small mortgage had given us so much more freedom in every aspect of our life. I am a SAHM which works well because DH travels a lot. We don't have a cleaning or lawn service. We don't eat out very often except with travel. What we do have money for is retirement, college, private school, travel, sports/arts/music for the kids. I also read the "The Two Income Trap" by Elizabeth Warren a while back and another financial book that said for most people their biggest debt burden is their house. So it was a choice for us. We gave up DC because of the cost of housing. Good luck with your decisions OP. You are right the time with children goes by fast.

I would definitely try to find a different job. I have worked FT, PT, and SAH, and PT is the best of all possible worlds. Even a "small" job helps you keep a foot in the working world.

$2500? Shit! Can I hire your nanny??