Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with having three kids at 29 is that most guys between 29 and 35 don't have kids yet but still aspire to have them in the near or distant future. They will be understandably worried about having to financially support both sets of children and may also feel like they want to experience parenthood for the first time with their own kids.

You will probably find dating gets easier in 10 or 15 years because men between 39 and 50 are more likely to have kids of their own. Also, age mellows people in a way that makes them more accepting of the unique personal history that mature adults typically bring to a relationship.

Or, she could just look for a 50 year old now. He'd probably do her.

Anonymous wrote:If it were me, yes, I would run the other way. 29 is way too young to have 3 kids as a single mom.

But then, I'm not a guy.

Anonymous wrote:The problem with having three kids at 29 is that most guys between 29 and 35 don't have kids yet but still aspire to have them in the near or distant future. They will be understandably worried about having to financially support both sets of children and may also feel like they want to experience parenthood for the first time with their own kids.

You will probably find dating gets easier in 10 or 15 years because men between 39 and 50 are more likely to have kids of their own. Also, age mellows people in a way that makes them more accepting of the unique personal history that mature adults typically bring to a relationship.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Same father who is very involved. We were never married. the kids are 7,5,3.

I totally acknowledge that my situation is different, since I have 1 child, but thought I should share anyway. I'm 30, with a 3.5yo. Ex is still involved regularly as well. I have found that usually guys are impressed with my situation. DD has a dad she sees 6 days a week (we split drop off/pick up), I have a decent amount of free time, and when my ex is brought up in conversation, I always speak positively of the situation (i.e. "Coparenting works, relationship didn't. No complaints."). I think its assumed when you're 20 something with kids that there must be drama or an absentee parent. I also find that people are more understanding of the breakup due to incompatibility because we early 20s when we met. Guys have told me they respect the fact we have made the most out of what could have been a bad situation.

There will be some guys who will not be interested, sure. But that holds true for anyone, you will not be everybody's type. Although I tend to date childless men, I have dated some divorced guys who only seriously date women with kids because they had kids young and don't want to feel obligated to have more. Being attractive definitely helps. I have met a couple of guys who have dated women with 3-5 kids and were open to marriage. One joked that his ex was so fine, she could've had 3 more kids and he wouldn't have cared (she had 3). A mutual friend tried to hook me up with the latter, but we werent a match. For one, he wants a large family so a single mom is a bonus to him. However, he prefers single moms without the dad around because he's a diplomat and moves every 2 years internationally. So there's someone for everyone out here.

For most guys in the 29-35 age bracket, a woman with one child would be far more appealing than a woman with three. Coming to a relationship with one child still leaves plenty of room (literally and figuratively) for the new couple to have kids of their own. With three, it becomes much harder logistically, financially, and mentally for the couple to add more.

I get that its easier for this reason. I do think older men would be a better match for OP, men who have kids of their own or are totally fine as a stepdad only. The exception to this is guys 29-35 who are current/former military and out of their starter marriages. Lots of em had kids young too and are not looking to have more.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Same father who is very involved. We were never married. the kids are 7,5,3.

I totally acknowledge that my situation is different, since I have 1 child, but thought I should share anyway. I'm 30, with a 3.5yo. Ex is still involved regularly as well. I have found that usually guys are impressed with my situation. DD has a dad she sees 6 days a week (we split drop off/pick up), I have a decent amount of free time, and when my ex is brought up in conversation, I always speak positively of the situation (i.e. "Coparenting works, relationship didn't. No complaints."). I think its assumed when you're 20 something with kids that there must be drama or an absentee parent. I also find that people are more understanding of the breakup due to incompatibility because we early 20s when we met. Guys have told me they respect the fact we have made the most out of what could have been a bad situation.

There will be some guys who will not be interested, sure. But that holds true for anyone, you will not be everybody's type. Although I tend to date childless men, I have dated some divorced guys who only seriously date women with kids because they had kids young and don't want to feel obligated to have more. Being attractive definitely helps. I have met a couple of guys who have dated women with 3-5 kids and were open to marriage. One joked that his ex was so fine, she could've had 3 more kids and he wouldn't have cared (she had 3). A mutual friend tried to hook me up with the latter, but we werent a match. For one, he wants a large family so a single mom is a bonus to him. However, he prefers single moms without the dad around because he's a diplomat and moves every 2 years internationally. So there's someone for everyone out here.

For most guys in the 29-35 age bracket, a woman with one child would be far more appealing than a woman with three. Coming to a relationship with one child still leaves plenty of room (literally and figuratively) for the new couple to have kids of their own. With three, it becomes much harder logistically, financially, and mentally for the couple to add more.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Same father who is very involved. We were never married. the kids are 7,5,3.

I totally acknowledge that my situation is different, since I have 1 child, but thought I should share anyway. I'm 30, with a 3.5yo. Ex is still involved regularly as well. I have found that usually guys are impressed with my situation. DD has a dad she sees 6 days a week (we split drop off/pick up), I have a decent amount of free time, and when my ex is brought up in conversation, I always speak positively of the situation (i.e. "Coparenting works, relationship didn't. No complaints."). I think its assumed when you're 20 something with kids that there must be drama or an absentee parent. I also find that people are more understanding of the breakup due to incompatibility because we early 20s when we met. Guys have told me they respect the fact we have made the most out of what could have been a bad situation.

There will be some guys who will not be interested, sure. But that holds true for anyone, you will not be everybody's type. Although I tend to date childless men, I have dated some divorced guys who only seriously date women with kids because they had kids young and don't want to feel obligated to have more. Being attractive definitely helps. I have met a couple of guys who have dated women with 3-5 kids and were open to marriage. One joked that his ex was so fine, she could've had 3 more kids and he wouldn't have cared (she had 3). A mutual friend tried to hook me up with the latter, but we werent a match. For one, he wants a large family so a single mom is a bonus to him. However, he prefers single moms without the dad around because he's a diplomat and moves every 2 years internationally. So there's someone for everyone out here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm in awe. I'm married with 2 kids and with their activities DH and I barely have time for an evening out. And I don't even have to primp. I think it would be a lot of work to raise 3 kids and have a relationship.

Amen! I'm a single mom of one and have no desire to date. I even think it would be good for me to get out again, but I just don't have the energy. I tried a few times, but a new relationship requires so much work that I just don't have it in me.

OP, I am a woman, and I think a guy will look for a lot more than just how many kids you have. In other words, there are plenty of bat shit crazy single, childless women who are not dating material and plenty of super nice, normal moms of 3. I don't think we could give you a true answer. The key is to do what makes you happy.

Anonymous wrote:You are 29 and have three kids. I think you should be focusing on them rather than dating so you don't wind up a single mom of four.