Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I rejected my dream school in favor of a state school where I had a full national merit scholarship because my parents had spent all the college funds on a mercedes benz and a luxury trip to Europe. Really.
Really. You got a free education instead of one that your parents had to pay for. Boo too.
+1. It was never your money OP.
Anonymous wrote:I rejected my dream school in favor of a state school where I had a full national merit scholarship because my parents had spent all the college funds on a mercedes benz and a luxury trip to Europe. Really.
Really. You got a free education instead of one that your parents had to pay for. Boo too.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Well, if this is true, prepare yourself for when your parents come to you looking for financial support when they are old and out of money.
Op here again. Sorry for all the responses, but with my daughter it's hard to get time on the computer.
I 100% agree with you. I've told my parents hundreds of times I will not and never will bail them out when they spend their last dime, and they just use this as yet another example of how horrible I am.
I should also mention that my parents have almost no friends or family left. Most people have just stopped talking to them because of how abusive they have become. They basically have my sister, who only moved out last year (nearly 30!). For years my mom said she couldn't make it on her own. Finally when she got married, her husband insisted that she move out (my parents wanted them to live with them and pay rent!!!).
But my question is still- was I wrong to continue to have a relationship with my aunt? I sent her Xmas cards and invited her to my wedding, but otherwise didn't speak to her. This was enough to blacklist me.
My husband got his dream job in the town where my aunt lives. My parents were furious with us for moving here as we would be close to my aunt. So they're not really talking to me now (except my dad sometimes). I'm so mad at them that I've decided it's okay to see my aunt. She's been so nice, and she apologized to me for any distance because she fell out with my parents. She even suggested she apologize to my parents for the falling out, but my parents insisted on written apologies for each of them, and a complete admission of wrong (which isn't even true!) and she balked at that.
I think reading toxic parents will help me a lot. Also probably therapy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Well, if this is true, prepare yourself for when your parents come to you looking for financial support when they are old and out of money.
Op here again. Sorry for all the responses, but with my daughter it's hard to get time on the computer.
I 100% agree with you. I've told my parents hundreds of times I will not and never will bail them out when they spend their last dime, and they just use this as yet another example of how horrible I am.
I should also mention that my parents have almost no friends or family left. Most people have just stopped talking to them because of how abusive they have become. They basically have my sister, who only moved out last year (nearly 30!). For years my mom said she couldn't make it on her own. Finally when she got married, her husband insisted that she move out (my parents wanted them to live with them and pay rent!!!).
But my question is still- was I wrong to continue to have a relationship with my aunt? I sent her Xmas cards and invited her to my wedding, but otherwise didn't speak to her. This was enough to blacklist me.
My husband got his dream job in the town where my aunt lives. My parents were furious with us for moving here as we would be close to my aunt. So they're not really talking to me now (except my dad sometimes). I'm so mad at them that I've decided it's okay to see my aunt. She's been so nice, and she apologized to me for any distance because she fell out with my parents. She even suggested she apologize to my parents for the falling out, but my parents insisted on written apologies for each of them, and a complete admission of wrong (which isn't even true!) and she balked at that.
I think reading toxic parents will help me a lot. Also probably therapy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don't know any blue color workers who have 3 carat diamonds, luxury trips to Europe and Mercedes Benz. OP's post screams troll.
Yes, there is just one too many things that the parents did wrong.
Anonymous wrote:Well, if this is true, prepare yourself for when your parents come to you looking for financial support when they are old and out of money.
Anonymous wrote:Your parents are narcissists. They don't love your sisters and not you. They just are using your sisters to supply their narcissistic needs and using you to dump their bad feelings on.
This isn't your fault. There isn't anything you can do about it, except find a place of peace and shelter for yourself. Other people are going to call you names for saying bad things about your parents. Ignore them. They don't understand how abusive and destructive a relationship with a narcissist can be. They truly can't fathom a parent like your parents.
Therapy would help you if you find a therapist who understands narcissists. Therapists who don't get it will do more harm than good.
Some self-help reading would also help. Try these books (If you just read the first 3, you will help yourself a lot. They're not hard reading. ):
Toxic Parents
http://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Parents-Overcoming-Hurtful-Reclaiming/dp/0553381407/ref=pd_sim_b_1
Thank you so much for this!
The Everything Guide to Narcissistic Personality Disorder
http://www.amazon.com/Everything-Guide-Narcissistic-Personality-Disorder/dp/1440528810/ref=sr_1_14?ie=UTF8&qid=1371300036&sr=8-14&keywords=narcissism
The Myth of Self-Esteem
http://www.amazon.com/The-Myth-Self-esteem-Rational-Behavior/dp/1591023548/ref=sr_1_10?ie=UTF8&qid=1371300216&sr=8-10&keywords=albert+ellis
The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists
http://www.amazon.com/The-Wizard-Other-Narcissists-Relationship/dp/0972072837/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1371299903&sr=8-2&keywords=narcissism
Will I Ever Be Good Enough?
http://www.amazon.com/Will-Ever-Good-Enough-Narcissistic/dp/1439129436/ref=sr_1_12?ie=UTF8&qid=1371299944&sr=8-12&keywords=narcissism
Children of the Self-Absorbed
http://www.amazon.com/Children-Self-Absorbed-Grown-Ups-Getting-Narcissistic/dp/1572245611/ref=pd_rhf_ee_s_cp_1_Q90P?ie=UTF8&refRID=0257SBBF24ET674NQ90P
Emotional Blackmail
http://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Blackmail-People-Obligation-Manipulate/dp/0060928972/ref=sr_1_45?ie=UTF8&qid=1371300117&sr=8-45&keywords=narcissism
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don't know any blue color workers who have 3 carat diamonds, luxury trips to Europe and Mercedes Benz. OP's post screams troll.
Yes, there is just one too many things that the parents did wrong.
Anonymous wrote:I don't know any blue color workers who have 3 carat diamonds, luxury trips to Europe and Mercedes Benz. OP's post screams troll.
Anonymous wrote:I don't know any blue color workers who have 3 carat diamonds, luxury trips to Europe and Mercedes Benz. OP's post screams troll.