Anonymous
Post 05/16/2013 23:07     Subject: Depressed about short maternity leave plan--Advice?

I wish I had thought to borrow against my 401k to take off more time. Had to go back at 5 weeks.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2013 12:56     Subject: Re:Depressed about short maternity leave plan--Advice?

OP - I know you don't want make a public leave donation request, and I totally get that. Just an FYI though - you can do a private leave donation. DH and I work at different agencies, and he was able to transfer annual leave to me. I was approved for leave donations at my agency (OB fills out form, etc.) and then I told my agency that I did not want to do a public request for donations. The two agencies just worked together to transfer DH's leave to me. I don't think it made a difference that it was my DH transferring leave. So, if there is someone with use-or-lose or who otherwise wants to donate leave to you - I think you could do that in a private manner.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2013 11:15     Subject: Depressed about short maternity leave plan--Advice?

Anonymous wrote:if you husband has leave have him take it when yours is up rather than at the same time as you. If he has enough leave to cover the 4-5 weeks until daycare opens then go back a week earlier and use that last week on the one day a week he is at work.


Agree - maybe he can take 2 weeks when baby is born (or even just one week), then go back and use the rest to cover some of that extra 4 weeks? My DH had NO paternity leave for either kid, so we just sucked it up and I went it alone. It wasn't too bad actually.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2013 11:02     Subject: Depressed about short maternity leave plan--Advice?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Can you do intermittent FMLA? So go back for 3 days a week or something like that. Then you'll get some of your pay check but will still have siginifcant time home with your baby.


Maybe it is pregnancy brain, but I don't know why this hadn't occured to me. I will see I can do this. The other wrinkle is that our daycare spot doesn't open until the baby will be 12 weeks or so.

To answer PP re finances--we had been saving agressively, but had some unexpected expenses which ate up a good chunk. I am contributng 12% to my TSP (it used to be 14%) and I increased my allotments (automatic transfer to savings account from paychecks). We continue to contribute a lot to our savings but won't be able to do this once I am LWOP.

My husband will be on leave, but he still has to show up to work 1 day a week. So, we have to figure out how to cover the gap when I go back to work and when the daycare spot opens up. I am hoping that spacing LWOP/paid leave/part time will help.

Thanks!


If you are contributing a lot to savings then USE YOUR SAVINGS! You won't regret it. That's what savings are for. I took 3 months off completely unpaid (plus some paid time) for both of my children and it cost me thousands (and we're not rich) but it was well worth it for all of us, and particularly for my own mental health.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2013 09:42     Subject: Depressed about short maternity leave plan--Advice?

if you husband has leave have him take it when yours is up rather than at the same time as you. If he has enough leave to cover the 4-5 weeks until daycare opens then go back a week earlier and use that last week on the one day a week he is at work.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2013 09:41     Subject: Depressed about short maternity leave plan--Advice?

I'm also a fed. I've got about 8 weeks paid, and then I'll be taking 4 weeks LWOP. Did you remember to count the days of leave you will accrue while on annual/sick leave? If not, you'll get a few extra days there.

I think you should definitely reduce your contributions to TSP. I'd cut it down to the 5% needed to get the full matching amount. Then take the rest in your pocket. Start now so you can save the extra cash to use on LWOP.

I was initially going to only take 8 weeks, taking the least amount of LWOP possible, but then I realized it is more important to me to spend extra time with the baby, relax, get into a routine, and make sure baby has settled into the world. (Plus what you mentioned - I can't imagine working while being so sleep deprived.)