Anonymous
05/07/2013 23:41
Subject: felt insulted by a colleague at professional event
Pathetic that she needed to mention her PHD and an instant lose for her at the table. Extra lose if she mentioned her alma mater. She probably suffered so long and painfully getting that PHD that just the mere mention of the topic caused her hackles to rise and to feel all personal and proprietary about it.
I only have a masters' but if someone started discussing my exact thesis topic at a social event it would definitely get my attention. (I would make an effort to stay neutral about it though.)
Dissertation topics are often so specialized and researched to death - interesting at first but then so so miserable (like some marriages in a way). A person can lose all rationality later if the subject is brought up. Almost like PTSD. They could lose all their social graces because someone brought up their precious topic that they know inside and out, to the nth degree, and someone else then dared to express a less-researched opinion on it. Then they have to prove their infinite superiority about the topic, because getting that PHD sucked so bad so they feel on some level that they at least have the right to school others on the topic.
After all that person who casually mentioned their precious topic is to her an interloper, a dilettante.
Her behavior was insufferable though, not excusing that.
I only have a masters' but if someone started discussing my exact thesis topic at a social event it would definitely get my attention. (I would make an effort to stay neutral about it though.)
Dissertation topics are often so specialized and researched to death - interesting at first but then so so miserable (like some marriages in a way). A person can lose all rationality later if the subject is brought up. Almost like PTSD. They could lose all their social graces because someone brought up their precious topic that they know inside and out, to the nth degree, and someone else then dared to express a less-researched opinion on it. Then they have to prove their infinite superiority about the topic, because getting that PHD sucked so bad so they feel on some level that they at least have the right to school others on the topic.
After all that person who casually mentioned their precious topic is to her an interloper, a dilettante.
Her behavior was insufferable though, not excusing that.
Anonymous
05/07/2013 22:33
Subject: felt insulted by a colleague at professional event
Anonymous wrote:In my opinion, when she said "I should just stop, shouldn't I" it was because she realized she had made an overblown idiot of herself and was embarassed. You won, OP.
This is OP here. I can honestly say I didn't think of it again all day after my healthy vent on DCUM but really enjoyed reading these responses as well. I LOVE the response about academia not translating into the real world, and think that would have put her in her place, but at the same time, I think I handled it well enough. I actually wanted to reply to this comment because I thought that the "I should stop, right" comment was just fishing for compliments or support and kind of extending the one-upmanship.
It's not likely I'll see her again, she is peripheral to my industry.
Anonymous
05/07/2013 20:53
Subject: felt insulted by a colleague at professional event
you should tell her that you're the COO and that she doesn't have a C in front of her name except for a 4 letter word that ends with T.