Our kids are 8 and 5 and we do take them out to very nice restaurants as well, but we tell them up front what things cost and that they cannot get the most expensive thing on the menu

If you can afford to take them to fancy restaurants and they actually eat the food, what difference does it make if they order the most expensive things on the menu on some occasions?

If it is a once a year occurrence, I would not say anything. His parents may be raising him to be wasteful, but he is their kid, and unfortunately, they get to decide how to raise him. If you feel that you are becoming part of something that you oppose, do something different for his birthday. You are certainly not obligated to take him out to such fancy dinners.

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit shocked that the parents allow this behavior. I would never allow it and make it clear that they can pick one entree under XXX price and that anything else is shared in less it is a birthday and then one desert. That is bad parenting and I would set a limit during the invitation and I would also pick a much cheaper place, like pizza or Chinese food. I can't imagine doing that to my parents. We order what we will eat and often share. I don't see the issue in sharing. I often will share my meal with my little one and its my parents ordering a separate meal. 1/2 the time she doesn't eat it so I feel bad spending their money to waste it.

I completely agree with this, OP. The kid is a spoiled brat and his parents are the enablers. Our kids are 8 and 5 and we do take them out to very nice restaurants as well, but we tell them up front what things cost and that they cannot get the most expensive thing on the menu. I don't care that it's his birthday or whatever. It is extremely rude behavior.

That said, I'm hoping that you do wrap up the uneaten food and take it home.

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Anonymous wrote:No! Don't say a thing! My god. Clean your plate is a great path to obesity and if you suggest the smaller entree u will look cheap. It is once a year. Let it go.

Hmmm, no, it's not. It's all the junk you eat. I ate actual food growing up, and was always reminded to clean my plate, both so as not to be wasteful and also out of politeness. I had my meals and didn't munch constantly like most people seem to do nowadays. At 47 years of age, I'm still a size 2. It's appalling to me to watch adults encourage their children to throw barely-touched proper food away because "well, they're just not hungry, and it's good that they assert that" only to turn around and feed them snacks and dessert when they eventually want to eat. Talk about obesity.

Do you know how much serving size has changed over the years?
PS - your size "2" isn't the same as a "2" from years ago. So you enjoy your vanity sizing.

New poster. This is ridiculous. Are you actually trying to tell her she's fat and that a Size 2, however vanity-sized, is big?

Maybe I was too subtle. It's an EXAMPLE to show you that actually eating all that's in your plate won't make you fat. It's WHAT you eat.
Oh, and also, I assume fast food joints have indeed increased portion size in their menus (I wouldn't know, since I don't eat that food), but I doubt a classy restaurant such as the one where OP is gracious enough to take her grandchildren would "supersize" a lobster order.

Aww, did I touch a nerve, sweetie?
While the lobster might not be "super sized," other things, such as the dessert, are most likely larger.
You must have your head in the sand if you genuinely believe fast food places are the only ones increasing portion size.

Actually, you are quite wrong. Higher end restaurants are shrinking portions while raising prices to cover the insane rise in food costs; especially, steak houses because the cost of beef is like a runaway train. An order of steak frites at Mon Ami Gabi is 1/2 the size it was 10 years ago. The sides at the Palm or Ruth's are smaller, the shrimp in the appetizers aren't quite as large, the desserts are certainly smaller.

I agree, take him somewhere cheaper. It sounds like his parents are not going to say anything. If he asks why he is going someplace else, then you bring up the waste at the expensive restaurant.

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Anonymous wrote:No! Don't say a thing! My god. Clean your plate is a great path to obesity and if you suggest the smaller entree u will look cheap. It is once a year. Let it go.

Hmmm, no, it's not. It's all the junk you eat. I ate actual food growing up, and was always reminded to clean my plate, both so as not to be wasteful and also out of politeness. I had my meals and didn't munch constantly like most people seem to do nowadays. At 47 years of age, I'm still a size 2. It's appalling to me to watch adults encourage their children to throw barely-touched proper food away because "well, they're just not hungry, and it's good that they assert that" only to turn around and feed them snacks and dessert when they eventually want to eat. Talk about obesity.

Do you know how much serving size has changed over the years?
PS - your size "2" isn't the same as a "2" from years ago. So you enjoy your vanity sizing.

Hehe, you missed. Vanity sizing is recent, so if she's an "old" size 2, she's actually a 00 now.

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Anonymous wrote:Suggest sharing appetizers and desserts. Nobody needs their own shrimp cocktails and own huge slab of cake.

I hated when my grandparents did this. They always insisted that we all share because they had tiny appetites, and they wanted all the leftovers wrapped up. I hated eating out with them consequently.

Honey, I'm not saying to insist, I'm saying to suggest. "Grandpa and I love shrimp cocktail too - shall we get two for the table?" If the child says no, he wants his own, I'd let him have his own.

You're putting your guest in an impossibly awkward position. I wouldn't feel comfortable saying "I want my own", but I'd resent you.

I'm all for not wasting food but it's his birthday for crying out loud. Let him enjoy what he wants to eat even if it means he doesn't finish. If you don't like seeing the food wasted take it home or let him take it home. One of my grandmothers was just like this when I was growing up, she'd always watch everyone's plate to make sure we all finished our food. I'm not close to the grandmother at all and I hated eating at her house. If you want to ruin a good relationship with your grandson go ahead and say something. If you want to enjoy a loving relationship don't say anything about what he eats during what is supposed to be a special meal for him on a special day.

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Anonymous wrote:Suggest sharing appetizers and desserts. Nobody needs their own shrimp cocktails and own huge slab of cake.

I hated when my grandparents did this. They always insisted that we all share because they had tiny appetites, and they wanted all the leftovers wrapped up. I hated eating out with them consequently.

+1

-1

-2. I love eating with my grandma because of this.

It's rude to invite someone out to dinner, ask him to order, and then complain about what he ordered. All of us in my family, kids included, get individual apps and entrees (and we're slim, if it matters).

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Anonymous wrote:No! Don't say a thing! My god. Clean your plate is a great path to obesity and if you suggest the smaller entree u will look cheap. It is once a year. Let it go.

Hmmm, no, it's not. It's all the junk you eat. I ate actual food growing up, and was always reminded to clean my plate, both so as not to be wasteful and also out of politeness. I had my meals and didn't munch constantly like most people seem to do nowadays. At 47 years of age, I'm still a size 2. It's appalling to me to watch adults encourage their children to throw barely-touched proper food away because "well, they're just not hungry, and it's good that they assert that" only to turn around and feed them snacks and dessert when they eventually want to eat. Talk about obesity.

A shrimp cocktail, a three pound lobster, and a slab of cake is a huge meal. No one needs this much food. This isn't a meal. It's enough for three people.

A 2.5 lb lobster has under 300 calories. Obviously the butter and the sides will add up, but it's really not going to feed 3 people. The cake is over the top, but maybe not for an active teenage boy.

I would just take home the leftovers and have a nice lobster salad the next day. You can make a decent lobster roll with half a tail of a large lobster.

So you would take home someone else's leftovers? I can't see a 14-year old kid making a lobster salad. It does sound delish, though.

If it's my grandson's lobster and he's left most of it and doesn't want it then sure, I'd take it home. It's not like it's from the next table. We eat lobster a lot in the summer at our summer place and often save the leftovers for the next day - omelets, salad, lobster rolls. It's usually served plain so it's basically just cooked lobster. It can be served cold so does not lose texture in reheating or whatever. If the grandson or parents want it that's fine too - I got the impression that OP was concerned about waste so as long as someone is taking it home who cares.

He's 14. Take him somewhere cheaper, for God's sake. He'd probably rather have pizza.

I wouldn't say something, it's once a year Take the family somewhere else if the $$ seems wasteful or bothers you. Take leftovers home if you'd like to to do. Other than that, if you're gonna take someone out to a nice restaurant let them order what they want once a year and just let it go.

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Anonymous wrote:No! Don't say a thing! My god. Clean your plate is a great path to obesity and if you suggest the smaller entree u will look cheap. It is once a year. Let it go.

Hmmm, no, it's not. It's all the junk you eat. I ate actual food growing up, and was always reminded to clean my plate, both so as not to be wasteful and also out of politeness. I had my meals and didn't munch constantly like most people seem to do nowadays. At 47 years of age, I'm still a size 2. It's appalling to me to watch adults encourage their children to throw barely-touched proper food away because "well, they're just not hungry, and it's good that they assert that" only to turn around and feed them snacks and dessert when they eventually want to eat. Talk about obesity.

A shrimp cocktail, a three pound lobster, and a slab of cake is a huge meal. No one needs this much food. This isn't a meal. It's enough for three people.

A 2.5 lb lobster has under 300 calories. Obviously the butter and the sides will add up, but it's really not going to feed 3 people. The cake is over the top, but maybe not for an active teenage boy.

I would just take home the leftovers and have a nice lobster salad the next day. You can make a decent lobster roll with half a tail of a large lobster.

So you would take home someone else's leftovers? I can't see a 14-year old kid making a lobster salad. It does sound delish, though.

How is it "someone else's leftovers" if the grandparents paid the bill? It's not soup, it's a lobster. I would absolutely take it home.

Usually when someone orders a meal and eats some of it, it's their leftovers, not the person who paid for it.

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Anonymous wrote:No! Don't say a thing! My god. Clean your plate is a great path to obesity and if you suggest the smaller entree u will look cheap. It is once a year. Let it go.

Hmmm, no, it's not. It's all the junk you eat. I ate actual food growing up, and was always reminded to clean my plate, both so as not to be wasteful and also out of politeness. I had my meals and didn't munch constantly like most people seem to do nowadays. At 47 years of age, I'm still a size 2. It's appalling to me to watch adults encourage their children to throw barely-touched proper food away because "well, they're just not hungry, and it's good that they assert that" only to turn around and feed them snacks and dessert when they eventually want to eat. Talk about obesity.

Do you know how much serving size has changed over the years?
PS - your size "2" isn't the same as a "2" from years ago. So you enjoy your vanity sizing.

New poster. This is ridiculous. Are you actually trying to tell her she's fat and that a Size 2, however vanity-sized, is big?

Maybe I was too subtle. It's an EXAMPLE to show you that actually eating all that's in your plate won't make you fat. It's WHAT you eat.
Oh, and also, I assume fast food joints have indeed increased portion size in their menus (I wouldn't know, since I don't eat that food), but I doubt a classy restaurant such as the one where OP is gracious enough to take her grandchildren would "supersize" a lobster order.

Aww, did I touch a nerve, sweetie?
While the lobster might not be "super sized," other things, such as the dessert, are most likely larger.
You must have your head in the sand if you genuinely believe fast food places are the only ones increasing portion size.

Huh? Touched a nerve? Really, by an anonymous online forum poster? Has it happened to you?