Anonymous wrote:A PP here. I never said, nor do I believe, that racism doesn't exist. I just find it troubling when the OP announces that her child has been to... what are we at now, 3 schools... because he never felt "welcomed." It apparently never dawned on OP that the one common factor in all of these situations is -- ta dah -- her child. But of course, that can't be the problem; it has to be everyone else.

I am the poster who mentioned 3 schools. It was not my kid. The last school was fantastic. My kid is a freshman in high school now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Your comments are so very ignorant. You clearly have no clue. This may be surprising to you, but these are not decades old stereotypes. Anytime someone tries to have ask a serious question, people on this blog get all offended. Maybe you should shut your mouth and try to seriously learn about a community that you clearly do not understand. My son went to 3 different elementary schools because he was not welcomed. We ended up in public school where he is happier. Many issues are subtle and people don't take the time to understand that people are indeed, still judged by the color of their skin. Stop watching so much television. Get some black friends. Maybe they can give you a lesson or two.

FAKE POST! And thanks for the giveaway. In one line, we're led to believe that we're having a discussion about K; now we learn that your son went to "three different elementary schools" because he (?) was not welcomed. (I know, it's tough when they don't have a brass band and red carpet out for you every day.)

I am not OP. My son went to 3 different elementary schools. When the second school suggested that our son had ADD, we had him tested. Turns out he had an IQ in the 150s. She begged us to move him, which we did. That was his third school. He's in high school now.

Anonymous wrote:Still think it's a fake post. A professional would not call the school they taught at racist in a pretend-but-not-really-anonymous post.

In what universe do you reside? My mom was a teacher and would not allow me to attend her school. She knew that it would not be a good place for me. She taught in a very racist school and did not want to subject her own kids to it. She was used to it.

Anonymous wrote:For those non-black parents complaining about this post, how many black friends does your child have? How many black children have been to your house for a playdate? What if all of the classmates and their parents are like you and your child? That can be isolating for a child of color. Look at you and your own child's behavior and how/whether they interact with other black children in their school or class.

DC attends Beauvoir. He is friends with just about everyone in his class. We have had, let me count, 5 black childen over our house for a play date and, at times, a sleep over. DC has been at the house of 6 black children multiple times for a play date.

Anonymous wrote:For those non-black parents complaining about this post, how many black friends does your child have? How many black children have been to your house for a playdate? What if all of the classmates and their parents are like you and your child? That can be isolating for a child of color. Look at you and your own child's behavior and how/whether they interact with other black children in their school or class.

My white son is mystified by the term "black".

Me: " honey, who is David ?"

My son: " you know him, and you know his parents"

Me: " I do ? "

My son: "Yes, you wre talking to them"

Me: "Oh, yeah, but what does he look like , I think there are two Davids, right " "what does David look like?"

My son: "what do you mean what does David look like ....he has brown hair, and his taller than Scott"

Me: "Is he black ?"

My son: " what? No, I wouldn't say he is black, he is more brown , brown like Matthew " " why do you ask ?"

Me:"because his parents will be at the dinner party tonight and I want to be able to remember what kid goes with what parent so that I can ask about their son in conversation"

My son: " well, I still don't understand why you don't know David, you talked to his parents before..I saw you"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Your comments are so very ignorant. You clearly have no clue. This may be surprising to you, but these are not decades old stereotypes. Anytime someone tries to have ask a serious question, people on this blog get all offended. Maybe you should shut your mouth and try to seriously learn about a community that you clearly do not understand. My son went to 3 different elementary schools because he was not welcomed. We ended up in public school where he is happier. Many issues are subtle and people don't take the time to understand that people are indeed, still judged by the color of their skin. Stop watching so much television. Get some black friends. Maybe they can give you a lesson or two.

If the post were real, the teacher could be easily identified. It does not feel genuine.

You will never get white people to answer this freely just like they would not send their white child to a school that was 90% black, Hispanic or Asian. Minorities are more likely to subject their children to these environments so that there children can get what they deem as the best opportunity. I get concerned that these subtleties will continue into the college application process.

Anonymous wrote:For those non-black parents complaining about this post, how many black friends does your child have? How many black children have been to your house for a playdate? What if all of the classmates and their parents are like you and your child? That can be isolating for a child of color. Look at you and your own child's behavior and how/whether they interact with other black children in their school or class.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Hmmm. I find your post offensive and I am neither OP nor black. Why assume its a means of getting ahead? You sound ignorant. There are subtleties - assuming black children are not smart, or will be troublesome, or not bothering to pick them when they have their hands up, assuming they are in the wrong in a kiddie spat, assuming their backgrounds or cultural milieu is inferior. I went to privates and Ivy's all my life and so do my children and we see it at all levels - from K to college. It is the assumptions and subtleties that sting - and because some of my friends are so conscious of NOT assuming these slights are due to race they have found all sorts of reasons but often they have reluctantly and sadly come to the realization that it is race - and these are successful, driven people who use no excuse to "get ahead".

8:54 again, and to me, YOUR rationalization comes across as ignorant, and quite pompous as well. How ridiculous of you to ascribe motives to other people's actions. Is this an inferiority complext on your part, or a deeply held guilt for how you are afraid YOU would have behaved in a situation? In other words, how do YOU know what other people are "assuming?" Maybe these particular kids and their actions gave teachers/ schools plenty of reason to do or say as they did.

No, I am sorry, you seem blissfully ignorant. I am sorry but you do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Hmmm. I find your post offensive and I am neither OP nor black. Why assume its a means of getting ahead? You sound ignorant. There are subtleties - assuming black children are not smart, or will be troublesome, or not bothering to pick them when they have their hands up, assuming they are in the wrong in a kiddie spat, assuming their backgrounds or cultural milieu is inferior. I went to privates and Ivy's all my life and so do my children and we see it at all levels - from K to college. It is the assumptions and subtleties that sting - and because some of my friends are so conscious of NOT assuming these slights are due to race they have found all sorts of reasons but often they have reluctantly and sadly come to the realization that it is race - and these are successful, driven people who use no excuse to "get ahead".

+1000

We have experienced this as well. I feel it from the teachers and some of the families. My kid is very kind, caring and shares and this is the way others describe him. I had families ask me directly if I'm on FA and are not included in certain events. I know the teachers thought that we were on FA and they were surprised when we challenged them on certain things. We weren't on FA so we didn't feel powerless. They even apologized. It is much more subtle at my other kids school but I can tell you that our kids are much more likely to get notes homes saying how we didn't use kind words to a friend or something about our tone. How our child made a sensitive child cry but if my child cries then my child needs thicker skin. We will probably leave the school but I'm not sure if our alternatives are better.

A PP here. I never said, nor do I believe, that racism doesn't exist. I just find it troubling when the OP announces that her child has been to... what are we at now, 3 schools... because he never felt "welcomed." It apparently never dawned on OP that the one common factor in all of these situations is -- ta dah -- her child. But of course, that can't be the problem; it has to be everyone else.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Hmmm. I find your post offensive and I am neither OP nor black. Why assume its a means of getting ahead? You sound ignorant. There are subtleties - assuming black children are not smart, or will be troublesome, or not bothering to pick them when they have their hands up, assuming they are in the wrong in a kiddie spat, assuming their backgrounds or cultural milieu is inferior. I went to privates and Ivy's all my life and so do my children and we see it at all levels - from K to college. It is the assumptions and subtleties that sting - and because some of my friends are so conscious of NOT assuming these slights are due to race they have found all sorts of reasons but often they have reluctantly and sadly come to the realization that it is race - and these are successful, driven people who use no excuse to "get ahead".

8:54 again, and to me, YOUR rationalization comes across as ignorant, and quite pompous as well. How ridiculous of you to ascribe motives to other people's actions. Is this an inferiority complext on your part, or a deeply held guilt for how you are afraid YOU would have behaved in a situation? In other words, how do YOU know what other people are "assuming?" Maybe these particular kids and their actions gave teachers/ schools plenty of reason to do or say as they did.

Do you think that racism does not exist or what are you saying? How do you think it manifests nowadays? My goodness, how can you be so unaware?

For those non-black parents complaining about this post, how many black friends does your child have? How many black children have been to your house for a playdate? What if all of the classmates and their parents are like you and your child? That can be isolating for a child of color. Look at you and your own child's behavior and how/whether they interact with other black children in their school or class.

Anonymous wrote:I think OP's question is valid. My young, white DC is best friends with the 1 black kid in the class. At a party recently, we were the only white people there, and DC felt decidedly out of place - pointing out the differences in hair, skin, etc. Of course these things don't matter, but what parent doesn't want to ensure their kid feels like one of the bunch?

So I realized that this kid must feel that way all the time (at our predminantly white school).

If I were OP I would certainly be asking this question.

This. Until you have been there you have no idea what it is like.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Your comments are so very ignorant. You clearly have no clue. This may be surprising to you, but these are not decades old stereotypes. Anytime someone tries to have ask a serious question, people on this blog get all offended. Maybe you should shut your mouth and try to seriously learn about a community that you clearly do not understand. My son went to 3 different elementary schools because he was not welcomed. We ended up in public school where he is happier. Many issues are subtle and people don't take the time to understand that people are indeed, still judged by the color of their skin. Stop watching so much television. Get some black friends. Maybe they can give you a lesson or two.

FAKE POST! And thanks for the giveaway. In one line, we're led to believe that we're having a discussion about K; now we learn that your son went to "three different elementary schools" because he (?) was not welcomed. (I know, it's tough when they don't have a brass band and red carpet out for you every day.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry for not being more clear. if any of you had children of color you would probably understand, but a place where a child of color would feel welcome and not be the only child of color in her class. i agree, we should be beyond this but sadly we are so not in america. i am sure WIS is a good place but i was wondering about other schools. and yes, i taught at st. patrick's and i saw first hand how they treated the Black children there but that's for another post.

Really? That makes me sad. I mean that, for the children's sake.

Oh, for pete's sake, get over yourself OP. How they "treated" the black children? Did they single them out and make them sit in the closet? Please do elaborate.

You are full of it and you know it. Frankly, I feel sorry for your child. who obviously has a parent who thinks her best shot in life is to perpetrate decades-old stereotypes as a means of getting ahead.

Your comments are so very ignorant. You clearly have no clue. This may be surprising to you, but these are not decades old stereotypes. Anytime someone tries to have ask a serious question, people on this blog get all offended. Maybe you should shut your mouth and try to seriously learn about a community that you clearly do not understand. My son went to 3 different elementary schools because he was not welcomed. We ended up in public school where he is happier. Many issues are subtle and people don't take the time to understand that people are indeed, still judged by the color of their skin. Stop watching so much television. Get some black friends. Maybe they can give you a lesson or two.

FAKE POST! And thanks for the giveaway. In one line, we're led to believe that we're having a discussion about K; now we learn that your son went to "three different elementary schools" because he (?) was not welcomed. (I know, it's tough when they don't have a brass band and red carpet out for you every day.)