Anonymous
12/18/2013 12:41
Subject: Re:I dont like overnight guests
I am with you OP. I also don't like overnight guests. When DH and I visit family, we prefer to stay in a hotel. That way everyone has their space. Staying with people is annoying, and having people stay with you is annoying. Our solution is to just have family visit us once a year. People staying with us stresses me out, but we also tend to have very high maintenance guests who won't go out and do things on their own.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 12:12
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:So what -- don't have a guest room.
As long as you don't then ask to stay at other peoples' house, just don't have a guest room in your house. Problem solved.
Ha! That doesn't stop my relatives. All they need is a couch - maybe not even that.
My DH's family is like this too. "Just throw down an air mattress! We don't care! We'll bring sleeping bags! We are easy!"
Umm, no thanks. We are not in college anymore, thank you. I don't care to have sprawling bodies and stuff all over my house. No thanks.
Thank you! Two years ago, my ILs bought a 2BR condo at the beach for "the family to enjoy.". It's a nice place and all, but they invite my family of FIVE to come down for a week WITH them and think I'm rude because I refuse. I hate being in such close quarters and drawing straws for who's going to sleep where...plus, there's no privacy and zero escape.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 11:57
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:1458... I am not an ass. I am an introvert who finds it physically draining to entertain people. I don't mind socializing but there is the whole world to socialize and pretend to be extroverted. In my home is where I draw the line. That's my one place.
1459 I do tell people, but not exactly how I said it here. I try to be nice but people don't get it. They expect you to cater to them. I find it to be rude. And its offensive that there is this notion that I need to change. No I don't. I am fine. If you don't get it maybe you need to change into a person with better manners. Everyone doesn't want you in their face all the time. There is room for all types of people.
You're not an introvert. You're selfish. I'm very introverted and I can happily open my home to friends and family. You just never learned how to share.
+1
I'm also a big time introvert. The people I end up close to, I would welcome staying over for short periods of time. Long periods of time is another question, but that's not an introvert/extrovert thing.
OP, I hope when you go places, you ALWAYS book a hotel and expect no one to lend you a hand.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 11:53
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:So what -- don't have a guest room.
As long as you don't then ask to stay at other peoples' house, just don't have a guest room in your house. Problem solved.
Ha! That doesn't stop my relatives. All they need is a couch - maybe not even that.
My DH's family is like this too. "Just throw down an air mattress! We don't care! We'll bring sleeping bags! We are easy!"
Umm, no thanks. We are not in college anymore, thank you. I don't care to have sprawling bodies and stuff all over my house. No thanks.
+1 My family is like that and I hate it. Thankfully, my single sister just moved into the area so they stay with her. She gives my parents her bed or shares it with them (Yuck).
Anonymous
12/18/2013 11:51
Subject: Re:I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:I used to be that way.
What solved it?
Our house now has a full bath and separate bedroom on basement level off a small rec room.
We sleep 2 levels up on the bedroom level. The guests have their own tv and living space and I can't hear them at all.
I also never use that bathroom. Not having them in my space made all the difference.
We also live in a very walkable area so guests take a key and love to explore on their own.
I think I'd be OK with that situation.
We currently like in a small-ish 3 bedroom so I hate house guests because a bathroom and walls will be shared.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 11:23
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:So what -- don't have a guest room.
As long as you don't then ask to stay at other peoples' house, just don't have a guest room in your house. Problem solved.
Ha! That doesn't stop my relatives. All they need is a couch - maybe not even that.
My DH's family is like this too. "Just throw down an air mattress! We don't care! We'll bring sleeping bags! We are easy!"
Umm, no thanks. We are not in college anymore, thank you. I don't care to have sprawling bodies and stuff all over my house. No thanks.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 11:21
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:So what -- don't have a guest room.
As long as you don't then ask to stay at other peoples' house, just don't have a guest room in your house. Problem solved.
Ha! That doesn't stop my relatives. All they need is a couch - maybe not even that.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 11:10
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:I like having people over and I am pretty much willing to give anyone i know the shirt off of my back. But, after working all week, I am usually too tired to make food and clean stuff for guests. I tend to be pretty messy and it's really hard to have the place organized enough to have guests stay over. If they don't mind, I"m fine with them staying. I realize I'm a bit too tired and lazy, but I'm glad everyone doesn't have low energy like I do.
This is me too.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 10:46
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
So what -- don't have a guest room.
As long as you don't then ask to stay at other peoples' house, just don't have a guest room in your house. Problem solved.
As long as you don't then ask to stay at other peoples' house, just don't have a guest room in your house. Problem solved.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 10:30
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
I like having people over and I am pretty much willing to give anyone i know the shirt off of my back. But, after working all week, I am usually too tired to make food and clean stuff for guests. I tend to be pretty messy and it's really hard to have the place organized enough to have guests stay over. If they don't mind, I"m fine with them staying. I realize I'm a bit too tired and lazy, but I'm glad everyone doesn't have low energy like I do.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 10:27
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
I have friends like this - solution? NO GUEST ROOM/NO PVT BATH. Problem solved!
Anonymous
12/18/2013 10:26
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:I am also introverted. Part of keeping my sanity around people is knowing I have a private place to retreat to.
+1. We have house guests frequently, and I hope I come across as gracious. But I find having to share space with guests for extended periods to be stressful: I don't sleep well, I feel overly anxious. We have three kids and dogs, so it is not like I require silence. I'm just used to the sounds of my nuclear family, and they don't bother me.
FWIW, I also do not enjoy being a houseguest. I appreciate people hosting, but the stressed/anxious feelings are there. Whether hosting or being hosted, I find the experience exhausting. I have tried to change this, but I think this is just how I am hardwired.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 10:22
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
I don't like overnight guests either. I really value my privacy and I rarely wear clothes at home so I can't relax when I've got to keep anything beyond panties on. But, I've got the space so I can't really turn family down without making waves.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 10:10
Subject: I dont like overnight guests
I actually enjoy having overnight guests, because most of the time it's just me and my daughter, and it's fun to have other adults in the house. I took some trouble to make my guest room a welcoming place, and it always has clean sheets and towels and a spare toothbrush.
that said, when my parents come in town for more than a few days, I start to stress a little because the house gets a little crowded. They're used to a bigger place and their habits are a little different than mine, so I have to suck it up.
that said, when my parents come in town for more than a few days, I start to stress a little because the house gets a little crowded. They're used to a bigger place and their habits are a little different than mine, so I have to suck it up.
Anonymous
12/18/2013 09:53
Subject: Re:I dont like overnight guests
Anonymous wrote:I used to be that way.
What solved it?
Our house now has a full bath and separate bedroom on basement level off a small rec room.
We sleep 2 levels up on the bedroom level. The guests have their own tv and living space and I can't hear them at all.
I also never use that bathroom. Not having them in my space made all the difference.
We also live in a very walkable area so guests take a key and love to explore on their own.
I prefer to stay in a nice hotel when I visit people though...