OP, if #4 turned out to be #s 4 and 5 (twins), would that change your or DH's opinion?

I would do it without hesitation. I would love a third and fourth. My husband is willing to have a 3rd in a year when I will be 39. I'm hoping for twins!

Anonymous wrote:Huh. Financial factors being considered, are you not planning on paying for their college? Because to save for another child's college tuition is like saving another quarter of a million dollars.

I mean, do what you want, but that's a big chunk of change that seemed missing from your equation.

More and more lit from financial advisers states that you are actually burdening your children less financially by putting your $ into your OWN retirement savings as opposed to their college tuition, sure its great if you can pay for it all, but coming at the expense of your retirement ends up being a larger financial burden on children than dealing with some student loans (obviously this is dependent on each case of loan burden). It seems counter-intuitive, but when we think about the fact that late 30s and 40s are the norm age in this area to have children, aging parents are a cost factor for the kids now when they are not all that established themselves (could be late 20s and dealing with 70 year old parents with health issues). Food for thought.

I was 37 with #2 and landed on headrest due to my BP. While I don't think you would have my major complications, I would be concerned about your capacity to care for your other children, specifically the 2yo. I only say this because my pregnancies at 34 & 37 were completely different.

I only have one - had her at 36. I don't see why 4 would be significantly harder than 3, or why 38 would be much worse than 35. (when you were last pregnant.) I would have had another one, but I'm 40 now and don't want to risk it - our Down risk was pretty high last time around.

Would you be ok with special needs, though? not saying it will happen, just that it's getting more likely as you age, and special needs could be difficult to manage with 3 other kids who need attention.

i wouldn't, but i am risk averse. play the worse case scenario. how would you handle a child born with a maternal age-related condition? physically, mentally, emotionally, financially. i'm not saying it WILL happen, but the fact is that it could (to anyone, really).

Huh. Financial factors being considered, are you not planning on paying for their college? Because to save for another child's college tuition is like saving another quarter of a million dollars.

I mean, do what you want, but that's a big chunk of change that seemed missing from your equation.