Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 16:39     Subject: Re:Getting dog before or after baby?
If you grew up with dogs, everyone in your family has dogs now and you have such a wonderful husband, then why are you not asking them about this decision instead of us? Those are your resources, not us.

With that being said, I vote no dog until everyone is at least 30 years old. Good luck!
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 16:32     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


going from 1 kid to 2 is a lot. adding a dog to the mix makes it feel like about 7 kids. speaking from experience....


I don't know about going from 1 kid to 2--that'll happen later this year--but my god, I was about ready to give my dog away on Craigstlist in the first year after our son was born. My husband adores her, my 3-year-old treats her like a sibling (sometimes loving her, sometimes pitching a fit because she looked at him the wrong way or touched him on her way by), but I still feel a little guilty about resenting all the fur and the mess and the barking and the finicky eating and the peeing in the house and the monthly vet bill for her Prozac. I'd wait--a couple of years, really, but absolutely until after the baby is born if you're still dead set on getting a dog this year.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 16:01     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


It sounds like you have been around dogs and kids a lot, which is wonderful, and terrific experience. But it really is a different thing to be the adult responsible for them, both dogs and kids, even being a nanny isn't the same as being a parent.

my thoughts exactly. when the buck stops with you on an infant, preschooler, and a dog, you may wonder why you were in such a hurry. and, it is nice to hear that your husband is helpful, but why add to the overall workload and stress of your family all at once? he will have to work double time with the 4 year old while you handle the infant, in all likelihood. adding mandatory dog walking to his to do list might not be as welcome as you think.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 15:58     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


going from 1 kid to 2 is a lot. adding a dog to the mix makes it feel like about 7 kids. speaking from experience....
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 15:57     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:I appreciate all the replies so far, but like I said on the OP, we are getting a dog this year, so the advice I am looking for is simply about it being before or after the baby. The decision is already made: we are getting a dog this year, not 1, 5 or 12 years from now.


Then I'd get it before so you have time to spend with it (puppy or grown?) and have dog in some training classes. The 4 yr. old will have a "buddy" when the baby is born and the puppy/dog will also have a "buddy,"and this should help both with jealousy. Lucky dog.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 14:09     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


I would say After for many of the same reasons others posted. The question I have to ask is what is the hurry to get a dog? Why does it HAVE to be this year?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:48     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
This is all great advice, OP, and if you're smart you'll heed it. Otherwise you should probably ask elsewhere next spring when you're looking to re-home your dog.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:47     Subject: Re:Getting dog before or after baby?
I certainly admire OP. I have told my 2.5 yo son that we can't get a fish. I seriously can't cope with another thing in my day!
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:38     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
The consensus is wait with the dog until after baby. Every single poster has said this, and I am adding my vote now.
You first have too see if the baby is healthy! What if you have to run to the NICU for a few months? You never know.
How long you wait after baby, well we cannot dictate that to you, but you have gotten some good advice here.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:37     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
The OP is already the parent of a 4-year-old though.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:35     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


It sounds like you have been around dogs and kids a lot, which is wonderful, and terrific experience. But it really is a different thing to be the adult responsible for them, both dogs and kids, even being a nanny isn't the same as being a parent.

I advise waiting until after the baby is born and sleeping through the night at absolute minimum.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:31     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


OP, it's clear that you're going to do whatever you want to do, so why are you bothering us?


Yes, I was very clear on my first post that we were going to get a dog this year. I was asking whether it should be a couple of months before or a couple of months after the baby was born. That's all. A lot of people are trying to convince me not to get a dog right now, which, if you read my first post back, I had already predicted and explained that was not the advice I was looking for.


Well, the consensus seems to be that both are terrible ideas. Have you found this advice helpful?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:31     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
So, you had dogs when you were a kid, not exactly the same thing as having a dog while being the FTM of a newborn baby.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:28     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:Wait at least until all humans are potty trained


+1

at least
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2012 13:27     Subject: Getting dog before or after baby?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here: yes, I have had dogs. I actually grew up with dogs, the first dog I had was little when I was born. The second one was still a puppy when my sister was born. My sister has two dogs, one came before kids and one came after the first and before the second. My dad is remarried and he has two dogs that were there before his kids were born. I know dogs are a lot of work. I know kids are a lot of work (I was a nanny for 8 years before having my own kids.) I am ok with that. I have a great husband who helps me with everything (from diapers to bedtime; from cleaning to making dinner) and we have a cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deeper cleaning (fridge, windows, closets, etc.) So I am not going into this thinking it's all rainbows and unicorns. I just wanted some outside perspective on the timing.


OP, it's clear that you're going to do whatever you want to do, so why are you bothering us?


Yes, I was very clear on my first post that we were going to get a dog this year. I was asking whether it should be a couple of months before or a couple of months after the baby was born. That's all. A lot of people are trying to convince me not to get a dog right now, which, if you read my first post back, I had already predicted and explained that was not the advice I was looking for.