Anonymous
04/18/2012 00:15
Subject: Re:Did they start selling drugs or something?
Anonymous wrote:What do you really know about their fiances??? We bought a second home (million dollar home) without selling first. We had over 20% saved for downpayment without making a significant dent in other savings, proceeds from another home or inheritance. We did get some weird (to say the least) comments from a few friends that apparently assumed our HHI was much lower than it is. This, I think, is because we are very frugal, never talk $ and don't drive flashy cars, etc. We both are usually silent when people start doing the 'Jones' talk or bragging about status/$. That sh*t always makes me uncomfortable. I was raised not to talk about those things. Unless- of course I am on an anon. forum!--I am a fed and I think many of them thought I make around 60k--when I really make 150k...and DH makes 3 times my salary. I guess since he is in IT (and not biglaw or a dr, etc.) ppl never assumed he was making as 400k+/yr. We have no debt other than mortgage and a ton of savings.
I really don't think you can assume anything about them. So what if they did inherit some $, etc. Also- it is really kind of evil to be spreading gossip or talking behind their back (accusing them of living beyond their means or being spendthrifts) without any direct knowledge. If your friends are decent people they never would discuss their salary/financial situation except with accountant/financial planner or amongst themselves.
how is posting on anonymous forum spreading rumor?
Anonymous
04/17/2012 17:05
Subject: Re:Did they start selling drugs or something?
What do you really know about their fiances??? We bought a second home (million dollar home) without selling first. We had over 20% saved for downpayment without making a significant dent in other savings, proceeds from another home or inheritance. We did get some weird (to say the least) comments from a few friends that apparently assumed our HHI was much lower than it is. This, I think, is because we are very frugal, never talk $ and don't drive flashy cars, etc. We both are usually silent when people start doing the 'Jones' talk or bragging about status/$. That sh*t always makes me uncomfortable. I was raised not to talk about those things. Unless- of course I am on an anon. forum!--I am a fed and I think many of them thought I make around 60k--when I really make 150k...and DH makes 3 times my salary. I guess since he is in IT (and not biglaw or a dr, etc.) ppl never assumed he was making as 400k+/yr. We have no debt other than mortgage and a ton of savings.
I really don't think you can assume anything about them. So what if they did inherit some $, etc. Also- it is really kind of evil to be spreading gossip or talking behind their back (accusing them of living beyond their means or being spendthrifts) without any direct knowledge. If your friends are decent people they never would discuss their salary/financial situation except with accountant/financial planner or amongst themselves.
I really don't think you can assume anything about them. So what if they did inherit some $, etc. Also- it is really kind of evil to be spreading gossip or talking behind their back (accusing them of living beyond their means or being spendthrifts) without any direct knowledge. If your friends are decent people they never would discuss their salary/financial situation except with accountant/financial planner or amongst themselves.
Anonymous
04/17/2012 16:48
Subject: Did they start selling drugs or something?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:What is so difficult to deny/understand? People who do well do not care what you are doing. Easy. MYOB. Act like you have class. Get it? I didn't think so.
Not asking anyone to care what I'm doing. Just wondering how my DH's friend (who does the exact same job as him) is able to afford 2 mortgages. If its so simple, I'd like to find out so I can do the same. Wouldn't mind junking our digs and moving on up. Just like the Jeffersons.
In that case, why not just ask them. I mean since you are so close and speak so openly about money why not keep doing it.
Anonymous
04/17/2012 16:43
Subject: Re:Did they start selling drugs or something?
well, underwriting standards are much tougher now, so if they are getting a mtg for the new house then you can assume they are justly qualified. ask your friend what kind of rates they are getting quoted - as if you were going to refinance. that will give you a clue.
but you may be very conservative with debt and your friend not so much. My mtg payment is $6.5K/month, and that shocks some of my friends. Just a matter of choices.
but you may be very conservative with debt and your friend not so much. My mtg payment is $6.5K/month, and that shocks some of my friends. Just a matter of choices.
Anonymous
04/17/2012 16:33
Subject: Did they start selling drugs or something?
This is how people start spending beyond their means. No one ever calls it jealousy. But that's what it is.
Anonymous
04/17/2012 14:31
Subject: Re:Did they start selling drugs or something?
OP, I have wondered the same about people around me who seem to be able to afford a much more lavish lifestyle on similar incomes. In many cases I think it's just a matter of some people having a higher tolerance for debt. I know a lot of people who have pulled equity from their houses in order to do renovations and additions, and this is something DH and I would never do. We just want to pay off the damn mortgage as soon as possible. Anyway, don't be jealous of your friends. It's a wonderful thing to be able to live within your means -- not to mention a great skill to pass down to your kids.