Tacky or not, seems overly dramatic to decline the invitation of a family member. Also puts you on the same level as "tacky" but maybe worse b/c you are willing to cause a family scene that will be talked about for years. "Susie didn't go to Jenny's shower so now she is not going to Susie's daughter's graduation." If you don't want to do the book, print out a few pictures of family members and put them in a 2.99 flip photo book. Write a little caption and print it out and stick it at bottom of each picture. Your cousin can point out pics of grandma, grandpa, mommy, daddy, and the fabulous cousin who was so thoughtful and creative to put together the photo book. It is a buck more than a card and you get the "how creative and touching points". Buy the registry gift you want to buy and toss an I.O.U into the wishing well to watch the kid for a few hours so your cousin can get her hair done. What mom doesn't want free time?!

I recently had a friend send me a link to the Meal Train website that she had set up for herself. Her email was sent to many and it said something to the effect of it being customary for friends to bring over meals or arrange for delivery of meals when a new baby arrives. She sent it twice.

I agree very rude. Sounds more like a shake down. The thing is I know people who would do exactly what was asked and just increase their credit card debt even more. Is that what "friends" want? I agree it is a reflection on the shower planner. Sooo rude and tacky!! A gift from the registry is enough.

It is in very poor taste to suggest the three gifts. I would put the amount that I would spend on the 1 gift in a card (cash). Done.

At my cousin's bridal shower. She had all of her guests write their name and address on the outside of a blank envelope so that she didn't have to write them for the thank yous. Talk about LAZY!! My aunts and I refused to do it. Wow. What's next.. we can write our own thank yous???

Tacky.

Anonymous wrote:This is a dumbass topic and a total waste of time.

The LNS guys made their way over here.

This is a dumbass topic and a total waste of time.

Anonymous wrote:It was rude. For sure. It is a gift-giving party...however, its not anyone's job to tell the guests what to give the mom. Telling people to bring diapers, books, or anything in particular is rude. You get what you get and you don't get upset, people! The MTB should graciously accept whatever she is given. However, pp have a point that the hostess may have done this without the MTB's knowledge, so cut her a little slack.

What are the consequences of being "rude"?

Do men give a rat's ass about this shit?

It was rude. For sure. It is a gift-giving party...however, its not anyone's job to tell the guests what to give the mom. Telling people to bring diapers, books, or anything in particular is rude. You get what you get and you don't get upset, people! The MTB should graciously accept whatever she is given. However, pp have a point that the hostess may have done this without the MTB's knowledge, so cut her a little slack.

I love the book idea. I've gotten several shower invitations asking (not telling) people that this is a gift that would be much appreciated. As a reader, I think it's great.

Technically the registry info accompanying the invitation is inappropriate. Doesn't bother me as much as that wishing well idea, though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enjoy the view from your high horse. Your response is so petty.

+ 1

Yeah, they want you to give the newborn a book to read. That is just so, so awful OP. It's as if they expect a diamond tennis bracelet from Tiffany's.

You are really digging for something to dislike here. You must hate the new mom.

+1

I don't see anything wrong with it. The book request sounds great and I wish I'd thought of that. Every time the mom reads the book to her LO she'll think of the giver. I think that's sweet.

Sounds like you just don't like your cousin.

Really, you are offended by the idea of bringing a copy of the Brown Bear Brown Bear? Get over it. You would have spent half that buying a card anyway.

Sounds to me like a misguided theme or party games concept. They wanted to do something special or different and may not have been thinking of it as additional gifts, just taking the gift budget and splitting it up into fun theme ideas. I also think it is perfectly fine not to attend.

Agreed that it is tacky

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree with OP that fishing for three gifts is just tacky. I would also RSVP no.

So, you would punish the new mom and her baby for the "tackiness" of the hostess?

I've only been to a few showers, but the mom-to-be was heavily involved in each. One PP did say that her friend who was hosting did something like this without asking, but at the ones I've been to, the moms were consulted. And one was very like this. I too found it obnoxious. Not so much the expense as the request for three separate items. It's a pain in the ass. And I was close to the friend so I felt I had to do it. I think I wound up skipping the book, actually, as all the ones I could think of were for a much older child (I don't have kids yet). Of course, I dislike showers in general, so perhaps it's me.

Let me get this straight. You have no kids, have not been to many showers, and dislike showers, but you feel you can opine on the tackiness of a shower invitation. Yeah.