OP,

Just apply to five or six schools and go to the school that's the best fit for your child and do all that you can to make sure he has confidence and PERSPECTIVE. It's perspective more than confidence. I do think some schools do a number on some student's self-confidence with so much emphasis on smarts. If you're a B- student at one of these schools, it can be tough.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sam2, are you out there? What is the driving force of this forum. Seems that the majority of people who post do so to egg each other on and not to exchange meaningful information. It is quite disheartening.

I agree and think this is a total troll thread.

I'm around. I'm not really sure what to make of this thread either. Even if OP's question is legit, I see how anyone could generalize about entire schools on these issues. It's also totally subjective and non-quantifiable, so it doesn't really tickle my toes. I do think OP could have posed the question in ways that are more constructive and less likely to lead to misunderstanding and hard feelings.

Sam2

Anonymous wrote:Yes, high school seniors are insecure - about things like friends & looks & boys/girls & clothing. I, too, would be deeply concerned about a senior that was choosing schools based on what his/her friends thought. That's a good sign of a kid who hasn't done much "finding" of themselves in high school.

I went to an elite school (not in DC), and was very sure of what I wanted in a college. So did most of my classmates. Our high school did, in fact, encourage us to discover who we were, how we were different, what made us unique. I am still pretty grateful for that.

Washington is a town that encourages conformity, and I sometimes wonder whether all of these schools are too homogenous for kids to develop the courage to be themselves.

Thanks. Would you mind sharing where you go to school ? Not that I am going to move DC just for a school or anything, but just to tuck the information away.

Anonymous wrote:Sam2, are you out there? What is the driving force of this forum. Seems that the majority of people who post do so to egg each other on and not to exchange meaningful information. It is quite disheartening.

I agree and think this is a total troll thread.

Sam2, are you out there? What is the driving force of this forum. Seems that the majority of people who post do so to egg each other on and not to exchange meaningful information. It is quite disheartening.

Yes, high school seniors are insecure - about things like friends & looks & boys/girls & clothing. I, too, would be deeply concerned about a senior that was choosing schools based on what his/her friends thought. That's a good sign of a kid who hasn't done much "finding" of themselves in high school.

I went to an elite school (not in DC), and was very sure of what I wanted in a college. So did most of my classmates. Our high school did, in fact, encourage us to discover who we were, how we were different, what made us unique. I am still pretty grateful for that.

Washington is a town that encourages conformity, and I sometimes wonder whether all of these schools are too homogenous for kids to develop the courage to be themselves.

Anonymous wrote:

I disagree and 19 years old is not a "kid". I am not talking about HS freshman. I am talking about HS seniors. Was is Piaget or Erikkson who said that,"identity is the developmental task of the teenager" Seems you need that to choose a college and a major. It is not the sum of a transcript plus extracurriculars.

This quote must come from OP again. The grammatical and syntax errors in this post are so abundant that there's no meaning left to your writing.

Maybe English isn't your first language? The rest of us understand the OP. Try Google Translate. If B*tchese isn't among the choices, maybe you can write your own translation program.

You are looking for 18 year-olds who are sure of themselves? Why? If I was "sure of myself" at 18 I would never have grown and changed in all the ways I did in subsequent years. I'm sure you would have thought I was some kind of failure at 18 because I was "unsure of myself." Its called being young.

I know I would not want to send my child to a school that pushes my child, or even "encourages" her to be a certain way, pursue a certain kind of life, make certain decisions. I want her to learn how to do those things herself and if that means she has to live through the typical years of uncertainty, thats a gift to her.

What you are looking for isn't the result of any school, or even any particular parents. Some kids are mature beyond their years. I don't know that this is a good thing, but its what you seem to want for your child. The school isn't going to create it.

Still, I think this whole thread comes down to the fact that you were shocked, shocked SHOCKED that a 19 year old made decisions on his own, based on reasons with which you don't agree. Somehow you think this is a really terrible thing and you must find a school that will prevent this from happening in your DC.

Let me give you a hint: if you insist on pushing, oh I'm sorry "encouraging" your DC to be "sure of herself" in a particular way, you increase the likelihood that she will thumb her nose at you and choose a path with which you don't agree.

But, hey, hold forth some more. You are very entertaining.

Bullshit. Let me guess, you are parent driving her child nuts with:

1) two after school classes each day of week
2) four hours of home work a night for all her AP classes
3) a private SAT prep course

All so that you can brag that she got into an Ivy. Meanwhile, your 18 year old doesn't have a clue who she really is. Go ahead, flame away on a syntax error and duck the central question.

My, my my. Inadequate and jealous parent I'd say.

I'll repeat the question . I'll be sure to add my bonafides so that it is clear to all that it is not a rhetorical question.

My child has attended a DC private from KDG through the present year, which is 8th grade. As his school does not go beyond 8th grade,we are applying to schools for grades 9-12. Based on my child's test scores and reports, the outplacement advisor has recommended several privates to which people on this forum ascribe the terms "Big 3" or "Big 5". All are fine schools by reputation that perhaps don't actually differ too much from each other in the end. Tours have all been great, etc... My question for this forum is intended for parents who have a senior in these schools or who are seniors at "Big 3" themselves:

Do you feel that your school has challenged you to chart your own course in the nest phase of your life" college. Specifically, have you gained in HS the beginning knowledge of yourself to choose a college based on a certain academic course of study that interests you. One that you may want to pursue a career in.

Why do I ask? ( someone actually asked that)

Because I am looking for an intellectually rigorous HS for my DC.

AND

Because I have met not just one,but a few students, from one of the schools that has been recommended for my DC who were frighteningly unsure of themselves. One of whom was VERY self-conscious about his college choice and VERY unsure of himself to the point of not wanting to apply to a school just because of what others at his school might think. I want to find out if this school is a robot factory before I send my DC there.

I am hoping for positive responses like," oh, my DC went to Sidwell and had several teachers who really inspired and pushed her" or " My DC went to Maret and I think the environment was instrumental in encouraging my DC to ...."I do not want to encourage the bashing of any schools. I can read between the lines of what isn't said

Thank You