My son was similar in middle and high school. I gave up "pushing" him after tenth grade and decided it was fine whether he went to college or did a trade.

He indicated an interest after his senior year, so I steered him to the local community college. I knew he would benefit from the smaller classes and teachers/professors whose priority is solely to teach (not do research and secure tenure).

He transferred to the state university after CC and lived in a quad. He ended up majoring in Computer Science. Somehow he figured out how to motivate himself to study and start assignments early enough to complete them by the due date. He got two years of the "college experience" in the quad, which was on the edge of the campus. Mostly I think he just enjoyed living independently and not under his parent's roof.

^ to the OP- my kid didn’t really get interested in talking about any of this until halfway into junior year.

My kid was a mess 9th and 10th grade. He even got Ds in 9th and dropped some classes. At the point you were in, we never thought he’d go away to school. But here we are, with an 18 yo and about to move him OOS to school this summer.

They change a lot during the second half of high school. Don’t worry about this now. Maybe your kid will stay home and go to community college or commute to one of the local schools. Maybe he will take time off and work. Maybe he will enter a trade. We looked at all of these options.

Or maybe you will do the traditional college tours and find a good fit for him. They change a lot between 10th and 12th grade.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suggest you enroll him in community college then have him transfer to a state college. He will get two years to mature at home, then two years of a dorm experience. That way, he gets a college degree for the least amount of money, and still gets to live on or near campus.

This only works for some majors, though, since community colleges don't teach everything. So first you need to start exploring with him what subjects he's interested in.

Many colleges have dorms guaranteed for only freshmen. Even in fall of freshman year, they may need to find roommates for apartments for sophomore year. Freshman year in the dorms is a main time for bonding. Some colleges do have dorms for upper classmen, but usually these colleges wouldn’t be big state schools.

Ah, my bad. My kid has guaranteed dorm all four years. And by dorms, there are different living arrangements, but they're on campus.

Anonymous wrote:Does he want to go to college? If he does, there is a school that will be a good fit for him. But if he doesn't, that's ok. Look through the offerings of your local community college and see if anything seems interesting to him.

My kid had mostly Bs, with some Cs and a few As. She's starting college in the fall at her dream school (with merit) to study her passion.

Merit? For what?

Anonymous wrote:I suggest you enroll him in community college then have him transfer to a state college. He will get two years to mature at home, then two years of a dorm experience. That way, he gets a college degree for the least amount of money, and still gets to live on or near campus.

This only works for some majors, though, since community colleges don't teach everything. So first you need to start exploring with him what subjects he's interested in.

Many colleges have dorms guaranteed for only freshmen. Even in fall of freshman year, they may need to find roommates for apartments for sophomore year. Freshman year in the dorms is a main time for bonding. Some colleges do have dorms for upper classmen, but usually these colleges wouldn’t be big state schools.