Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, my kids are 7 and 9 so, no, I do not actively worry about this.

We have a significantly lower HHI than you, but it is still way more money than my or DH's parents made. Cost of living in this area is way more than where we grew up too. We do not get financial help from family.

I hope to make sure my kids understand that they are not going to move our of our house into their own equivalent house and that the nice things we are able to do for them are us both working hard. I think they do know that already.

Honestly though, OP, if you do not plan to help your kids some in adulthood, why are you grinding to make over half a million dollars a year? Paid for college, money for a wedding (if they choose to marrry), downpayment for a home, paying for them to attend immediately family vacations are all things that my friends with wealthier parents have that make life a lot easier. It's not a trust fun or paying for daily living expenses but it sure helps and you likely could afford it.

Making $500K is not enough for all of that in a HCOLA. Sure, you pay for college and wedding, but you are not giving them a significant downpayment on that income where you have a lifestyle that requires much of it to live yourself.

I don’t think that’s right. If you bought or refinanced in 2021 with good interest rates, you can have a moderate mortgage I. A great neighborhood. If you have 500k pre tax, you’re likely taking home 350k after tax. You could very comfortably live on 125k a year with public school (assuming you’re out of the daycare years). If you’re saving and investing the balance, you’ll have a shit ton of money by the time your kids are adults.

Of course, if the lifestyle you want to maintain involves 130k/yr in private school tuition, new $50,000 cars every few years, and a country club membership, well, then you’re right that there won’t be a lot of wealth accumulated.

not where I live. The average home price is over $800K, and most people would not want to live in those homes and send their kids to the public schools where an 800K home is. Oh and that 800K home will be 25-30+ years old and have had no renovations done, except what was desperately required (ie if the roof had leaks it might have been replaced)

And that 800K home at 5% is $4K/month, then add in insurance (another $300) and assume $500/month to save for maintenance, so lets round and say it's minimum $5K/month. That's $60K/year for just your house, no utilities or anything else. Very easy to see how you can spend well over $125K to live.

And yes, I would not send my kids to schools in those areas. So you are looking at minimum $1.2M+ in my area for decent schools (not top), and still have an old house that hasn't be brought into this century (ie a ticking time bomb for major repairs $$$$)

Now add in cars and insurance, utilities, food, saving for college, and retirement, then decide to take a few vacations each year. And kids activities. Not much left to save so my kids can have a down payment at 28.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, my kids are 7 and 9 so, no, I do not actively worry about this.

We have a significantly lower HHI than you, but it is still way more money than my or DH's parents made. Cost of living in this area is way more than where we grew up too. We do not get financial help from family.

I hope to make sure my kids understand that they are not going to move our of our house into their own equivalent house and that the nice things we are able to do for them are us both working hard. I think they do know that already.

Honestly though, OP, if you do not plan to help your kids some in adulthood, why are you grinding to make over half a million dollars a year? Paid for college, money for a wedding (if they choose to marrry), downpayment for a home, paying for them to attend immediately family vacations are all things that my friends with wealthier parents have that make life a lot easier. It's not a trust fun or paying for daily living expenses but it sure helps and you likely could afford it.

Making $500K is not enough for all of that in a HCOLA. Sure, you pay for college and wedding, but you are not giving them a significant downpayment on that income where you have a lifestyle that requires much of it to live yourself.

I don’t think that’s right. If you bought or refinanced in 2021 with good interest rates, you can have a moderate mortgage I. A great neighborhood. If you have 500k pre tax, you’re likely taking home 350k after tax. You could very comfortably live on 125k a year with public school (assuming you’re out of the daycare years). If you’re saving and investing the balance, you’ll have a shit ton of money by the time your kids are adults.

Of course, if the lifestyle you want to maintain involves 130k/yr in private school tuition, new $50,000 cars every few years, and a country club membership, well, then you’re right that there won’t be a lot of wealth accumulated.

Anonymous wrote:I grew up upper middle class in a LCOL area. Parents did very well and owned multiple businesses.

I went to college with no debt, married husband and we also do well. HHI is around $700-800k a year. Sister is also doing very well and her HHI is around $1-1.2 million a year.

I worry our kids will get used to this lifestyle and never be able to replicate it. They are used to living in large houses, traveling to summer houses, flying on nice vacations (first class many times), etc. they aren’t spoiled at all and seem appreciative as much as kids can be but this is just the life they are used to. DH and I work hard and want to enjoy our life as well.

Do you also worry about your kids being able to maintain their lifestyle as they grow up? Of course DH and I do not want to or expect to fund our kids into adulthood and expect them to find careers and support themselves.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. One kid is in biglaw so has already had a taste of the high life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, my kids are 7 and 9 so, no, I do not actively worry about this.

We have a significantly lower HHI than you, but it is still way more money than my or DH's parents made. Cost of living in this area is way more than where we grew up too. We do not get financial help from family.

I hope to make sure my kids understand that they are not going to move our of our house into their own equivalent house and that the nice things we are able to do for them are us both working hard. I think they do know that already.

Honestly though, OP, if you do not plan to help your kids some in adulthood, why are you grinding to make over half a million dollars a year? Paid for college, money for a wedding (if they choose to marrry), downpayment for a home, paying for them to attend immediately family vacations are all things that my friends with wealthier parents have that make life a lot easier. It's not a trust fun or paying for daily living expenses but it sure helps and you likely could afford it.

Making $500K is not enough for all of that in a HCOLA. Sure, you pay for college and wedding, but you are not giving them a significant downpayment on that income where you have a lifestyle that requires much of it to live yourself.

I don’t think that’s right. If you bought or refinanced in 2021 with good interest rates, you can have a moderate mortgage I. A great neighborhood. If you have 500k pre tax, you’re likely taking home 350k after tax. You could very comfortably live on 125k a year with public school (assuming you’re out of the daycare years). If you’re saving and investing the balance, you’ll have a shit ton of money by the time your kids are adults.

Of course, if the lifestyle you want to maintain involves 130k/yr in private school tuition, new $50,000 cars every few years, and a country club membership, well, then you’re right that there won’t be a lot of wealth accumulated.

The bought or refinanced 2021-2022 is the key part here. We bought in 2024 and pay $7K PITI on a $750K mortgage for a modest 1400 square foot cape. Unfortunately we weren't born in time to buy earlier.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, my kids are 7 and 9 so, no, I do not actively worry about this.

We have a significantly lower HHI than you, but it is still way more money than my or DH's parents made. Cost of living in this area is way more than where we grew up too. We do not get financial help from family.

I hope to make sure my kids understand that they are not going to move our of our house into their own equivalent house and that the nice things we are able to do for them are us both working hard. I think they do know that already.

Honestly though, OP, if you do not plan to help your kids some in adulthood, why are you grinding to make over half a million dollars a year? Paid for college, money for a wedding (if they choose to marrry), downpayment for a home, paying for them to attend immediately family vacations are all things that my friends with wealthier parents have that make life a lot easier. It's not a trust fun or paying for daily living expenses but it sure helps and you likely could afford it.

Making $500K is not enough for all of that in a HCOLA. Sure, you pay for college and wedding, but you are not giving them a significant downpayment on that income where you have a lifestyle that requires much of it to live yourself.

I don’t think that’s right. If you bought or refinanced in 2021 with good interest rates, you can have a moderate mortgage I. A great neighborhood. If you have 500k pre tax, you’re likely taking home 350k after tax. You could very comfortably live on 125k a year with public school (assuming you’re out of the daycare years). If you’re saving and investing the balance, you’ll have a shit ton of money by the time your kids are adults.

Of course, if the lifestyle you want to maintain involves 130k/yr in private school tuition, new $50,000 cars every few years, and a country club membership, well, then you’re right that there won’t be a lot of wealth accumulated.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, my kids are 7 and 9 so, no, I do not actively worry about this.

We have a significantly lower HHI than you, but it is still way more money than my or DH's parents made. Cost of living in this area is way more than where we grew up too. We do not get financial help from family.

I hope to make sure my kids understand that they are not going to move our of our house into their own equivalent house and that the nice things we are able to do for them are us both working hard. I think they do know that already.

Honestly though, OP, if you do not plan to help your kids some in adulthood, why are you grinding to make over half a million dollars a year? Paid for college, money for a wedding (if they choose to marrry), downpayment for a home, paying for them to attend immediately family vacations are all things that my friends with wealthier parents have that make life a lot easier. It's not a trust fun or paying for daily living expenses but it sure helps and you likely could afford it.

Making $500K is not enough for all of that in a HCOLA. Sure, you pay for college and wedding, but you are not giving them a significant downpayment on that income where you have a lifestyle that requires much of it to live yourself.

Anonymous wrote:It is up to them. They see how much their dad works (he is the bulk of the income) and we talk with them about how the life we lead usually involves a busy stressful job. At this point I would be surprised if they make as much simply because they want a better work/life balance and I don’t blame them. DH didn’t set out to earn this much, we are living well beneath our means and plan to retire early. Luckily for them, they will have wealthy parents as a safety net, something that we did not have. They will need to support themselves but we plan to pay for college and possibly grad school, and subsidize vacations and some education for our potential grandchildren.