Define “start a family” for us and what you want.

What do you want your roles and responsibilities to be over the next 20 years for this “start a family” dream of yours?

Anonymous wrote:Yes OP, you really are too old at 47. Most guys caught this clue train at least by 40.

You might be able to find a poorer woman who needs to be financially supported (you don't have to go to Russia, you can just go to West Virginia etc ...) who is willing to take the risk.

Most women who can have kids and who want to have kids are already trying by their 30s, so most age appropriate women you want to meet will already have kids or be dealing with infertility.

You might be able to find a single woman nearing 40 who wants to give having kids one last try, but there is no guarantee.

He doesn't say if he's loaded. If he is a multimillionaire then maybe he can get a woman in her late 20-early 30s. But it will be a marriage with many power imbalances and high divorce risk

Usually women under 30 are trying with men in their early 30s

Yes OP, you really are too old at 47. Most guys caught this clue train at least by 40.

You might be able to find a poorer woman who needs to be financially supported (you don't have to go to Russia, you can just go to West Virginia etc ...) who is willing to take the risk.

Most women who can have kids and who want to have kids are already trying by their 30s, so most age appropriate women you want to meet will already have kids or be dealing with infertility.

You might be able to find a single woman nearing 40 who wants to give having kids one last try, but there is no guarantee.

Sorry I do think it's too late. You just don't have the kind of energy that someone who is 10 years younger will have for small kids. And by the time you actually HAD kids, you'd likely be 50.

There's nothing wrong with divorced women with kids.

What's most amazing is that he feels "invisible" to women. In fact, women his age or slightly younger do match him, but he considers them "full of baggage" if they have a child or two.

In fact, these women are far more capable of adulting people that him. They build something, took risk to commit to someone, raised a child or more. He is stuck in 20s development stage where he only judges women as "high value" if she's hot, 20-30 yo. And he gets shocked these younger women are not interested, so he considers a transactional relationship with a woman from developing world just to have that ego boost that he's "pulling off" a younger body.

All around sick person who shouldn't be having kids with anyone at all

Yes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a lot of 47+ year old men having kids. But every one of them is on family number two. The vast majority dated younger after their divorces (early to mid-30’s) and had what we lovingly refer to as “trap babies”. So choose a childless 30-something woman to date and if you’re even remotely successful and financially secure you’re a really good target for those childless women of a certain age.

Fine, but he's a much better option than a divorced dad with kids, an ex-wife, child support and alimony. You guys are being too hard on him. He's got no baggage. That puts him ahead of 90% of the other forty-somethings.

Au contraire, a 47 year old man who just realized he'd like to have a couple of kids and thinks he should mail order a desperate woman from a developing country to pop them out for him has an Airbus a321's worth of baggage.

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I'm invisible on dating sites. The only women that it matches me with already have kids and are divorced. Should I try a Russian brides site or something?

I guess I should have started a family back around 2010 but I was really focused on my career. Now I realize my priorities were wrong.

It is if you want children. I mean, biologically you could do it. But it’s not fair to a child to be born to a parent who is almost 50.

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I'm invisible on dating sites. The only women that it matches me with already have kids and are divorced. Should I try a Russian brides site or something?

I guess I should have started a family back around 2010 but I was really focused on my career. Now I realize my priorities were wrong.

Yes, try emerging markets dating and marriage programs.

If yours not going to look harder into why you didn’t priorities dating or marriage or partnership for 47 years, you won’t get anyone because anyone if value is going to want to know wtf you were doing or thinking all that time. And assume you are set in your ways. And your ways are self-centered so unclear where a spouse and child dependents suddenly fit in with a person like that.

You’ll need to demonstrate what you now want, not just pontificate about it here or elsewhere.

IMHO, yes. Too old. Plus, you’re 47 and single. Basically the soonest you’re having a planned baby is at 49. It’s too late. I wouldn’t date you if I wanted kids.

Your best bet is probably to date single moms and be an awesome stepdad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not too late. If you want bio kids, you’d have to find someone in her mid-30s, so I don’t know if that age gap matters to you. Otherwise as PP said you could find someone who wants to adopt. There are single childless women out there, OP.

You can but keep in mind that 47 year old sperms and 37 year old eggs are unlikely to provide a complication free fertility process. If you are ready for an infertility battle and possibility of a child with special needs, its worth a shot.

I know a family who had their first kid at these ages and ended up having FIVE (last one in mid 40s for the mom) and every single one is a popular athlete. It seems like if you have money everything works out.

If you are willing to pay for the eggs and/or sperm, sure.

The easiest would be getting a donated embryo some IVF clinics offer that

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not too late. If you want bio kids, you’d have to find someone in her mid-30s, so I don’t know if that age gap matters to you. Otherwise as PP said you could find someone who wants to adopt. There are single childless women out there, OP.

You can but keep in mind that 47 year old sperms and 37 year old eggs are unlikely to provide a complication free fertility process. If you are ready for an infertility battle and possibility of a child with special needs, its worth a shot.

I know a family who had their first kid at these ages and ended up having FIVE (last one in mid 40s for the mom) and every single one is a popular athlete. It seems like if you have money everything works out.

If you are willing to pay for the eggs and/or sperm, sure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not too late. If you want bio kids, you’d have to find someone in her mid-30s, so I don’t know if that age gap matters to you. Otherwise as PP said you could find someone who wants to adopt. There are single childless women out there, OP.

You can but keep in mind that 47 year old sperms and 37 year old eggs are unlikely to provide a complication free fertility process. If you are ready for an infertility battle and possibility of a child with special needs, its worth a shot.

I know a family who had their first kid at these ages and ended up having FIVE (last one in mid 40s for the mom) and every single one is a popular athlete. It seems like if you have money everything works out.

Every single child I know that was born to older dads has some sort of ailments

Popular athlete doesn’t necessarily mean academically successful or socially integrated

We started quite late and have a few kids. I can tell you that my husband desperately wishes he could retire and be on holiday all the time like the other guys his age instead of driving to soccer practice and going to school plays. Would he change the situation if he could? I think we both would have stopped at 1, if at all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not too late. If you want bio kids, you’d have to find someone in her mid-30s, so I don’t know if that age gap matters to you. Otherwise as PP said you could find someone who wants to adopt. There are single childless women out there, OP.

You can but keep in mind that 47 year old sperms and 37 year old eggs are unlikely to provide a complication free fertility process. If you are ready for an infertility battle and possibility of a child with special needs, its worth a shot.

I know a family who had their first kid at these ages and ended up having FIVE (last one in mid 40s for the mom) and every single one is a popular athlete. It seems like if you have money everything works out.