Your disappointment for your son makes me sad.

This is a you problem.

Anonymous wrote:18 year old son is stereotypically masculine and straight & narrow, meaning no drinking or drugs, heterosexual, into cars & working out & his girlfriend. He’s already got the New Balance shoes but thankfully nowhere near a dad bod. How likely is this to change or will he just slide into being a suburban husband/dad after college? I feel like he’s 90 % there. Anyone else here with a son like this? He never really had an “experimental” phase of any sort.

He sounds like a Don Jon

https://www.npr.org/2013/09/27/226577467/don-jon-smooth-move-there-mr-gordon-levitt


In voice-over at the top of the movie, Jon lists the things he really cares about: his body, his apartment, his Camaro, his family, his church, his pals, his gals, and his porn.

Anonymous wrote:
One main function of humans is to reproduce and delaying it until late 30's and 40's isn't natural, even with all the rational arguments we can make in favor of delaying it.

Our current system where cost of education, weddings, housing and childcare is inflated to the max, delays marriage and procreation and soothes youth with weed, liquor, prescription drugs, partying,hookups, dating apps etc.

All of it leads to ruin hormones and causing anxiety, depression and infertility because body was made to produce babies in 20's.

On top of that young woman's natural instincts and hormones get messed up with birth control hormones, anti anxiety and antidepressants while they are running after jobs, men, looks, designer goods, social media clicks etc.

If my son is ready to get married in his 20s and isn’t quite there with his down payment on a house, we will help him, for this reason. Even better, it will coincide with my retirement and being able to help with childcare.

We went from one extreme for women to another extreme. We were supposed to find a healthy balance somewhere in the middle.

One main function of humans is to reproduce and delaying it until late 30's and 40's isn't natural, even with all the rational arguments we can make in favor of delaying it.

Our current system where cost of education, weddings, housing and childcare is inflated to the max, delays marriage and procreation and soothes youth with weed, liquor, prescription drugs, partying,hookups, dating apps etc.

All of it leads to ruin hormones and causing anxiety, depression and infertility because body was made to produce babies in 20's.

On top of that young woman's natural instincts and hormones get messed up with birth control hormones, anti anxiety and antidepressants while they are running after jobs, men, looks, designer goods, social media clicks etc.

Anonymous wrote:Congratulations! You have raised a marriageable son.

Your DNA will continue!

👏
Your DNA will continue and thrive!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And 18 year old boy who likes cars, working out and his girlfriend sounds exactly like 18 year old boys ever since they invented cars.

Yes, it’s perfectly normal.
But these days plenty become potheads, soy boys, or other stuff and don’t have girlfriends, healthy hobbies, interest in school, or gainful employment.

"soy boys" go back to fox news ffs

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:18 year old son is stereotypically masculine and straight & narrow, meaning no drinking or drugs, heterosexual, into cars & working out & his girlfriend. He’s already got the New Balance shoes but thankfully nowhere near a dad bod. How likely is this to change or will he just slide into being a suburban husband/dad after college? I feel like he’s 90 % there. Anyone else here with a son like this? He never really had an “experimental” phase of any sort.

Where do you live? My kid is kind of like that though plays a lot of golf and enjoys parties (but is an athlete so not drinking)...but neither he and none of his friends are into cars. We live in Bethesda and I would say none of us dads are into cars either as it's just not much of a thing anymore these days.

Lol - just how deep in the sand is your head buried?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And 18 year old boy who likes cars, working out and his girlfriend sounds exactly like 18 year old boys ever since they invented cars.

Yes, it’s perfectly normal.
But these days plenty become potheads, soy boys, or other stuff and don’t have girlfriends, healthy hobbies, interest in school, or gainful employment.

I agree. I also think that the ones who become the loners and potheads, don't have interest in school or employment etc - are the ones who grew up in dysfunctional families and do not have the foundation and scaffolding to do well in this harsh world. Such kids had/have no safety-net. The society is becoming more and more dysfunctional and inequitable. They are also the result of our failing education system. The substandard products of substandard education and dog-eat-dog unfair society.

Anonymous wrote:I fail to see the issue.

There is none. I think we all are happy with how our sons think and behave. It just gladdens my heart to think that there are others like them.

Another thing - most of these men are also in very healthy and respectful relationships with their SOs, IMHO. They have the dating-to-marry mentality and they are not hasty in choosing partners. They have seen many late 30s and early 40s people who are lonely and have not made a functional family or put in the time in their relationships - and they are doing their best to not be like them.

They are like this because of the world they have inherited. This amount of awareness has come to them because they have seen the fault lines in the society, the stupidity of leaders, the greediness of oligarchs, failure of policies, destruction of democratic institutions and just the shamelessness of the people in power.

Our kids are thinking and living like this because this melting and polluted world is what we gave them. They now know that the selfish generations before them have given them unvaccinated population, terrible pandemic response, huge inequity in medical care, a destroyed Earth, no moral authority, AI, microplastics and war - and they are living like this in response to the nonsense they see around them.

They are cautious, frugal, collaborative, self-sufficient, self-disciplined. Because they have no one to depend on. They are looking at history and the present days and know that they will be left holding the bill, like the generation known as the "greatest generation".

If your kids are so responsible and self-aware then as parents you also must do your part. Support them as much as you can and have a level in preparedness in your own life that reassures them. Take good care of your health, take care of your finances, become community minded and generous.

There are many 18 yr old boys who are vaping, doing drugs, going on InCel sites, turning MAGA, hating on other people in the community, being wasteful, not into education or self-improvement. Thank God that we have these gems as our sons.

My DH was like this and he's been the best DH and father. He's an introvert, but he's still well spoken and not shy.

I fail to see the issue.

Anonymous wrote:And 18 year old boy who likes cars, working out and his girlfriend sounds exactly like 18 year old boys ever since they invented cars.

Yes, it’s perfectly normal.
But these days plenty become potheads, soy boys, or other stuff and don’t have girlfriends, healthy hobbies, interest in school, or gainful employment.

And 18 year old boy who likes cars, working out and his girlfriend sounds exactly like 18 year old boys ever since they invented cars.