Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op - I do love my original ring. I just sometimes feel out of place when I am around my DH’s work colleagues and their wives. He is in big law/tech sort of job so everyone makes $$$.

Perhaps instead I will get a ring for my right hand or I was thinking of just getting a big chunky eternity ring to wear to alternate between the two.

You do know nobody’s comparing rings, right?

They absolutely do.

Younger people do. I'm 58 and don't care anymore.

Anonymous wrote:No. This is not something normal people do. Like, how vapid.

People who consider themselves celebrities seem to do it annually.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op - I do love my original ring. I just sometimes feel out of place when I am around my DH’s work colleagues and their wives. He is in big law/tech sort of job so everyone makes $$$.

Perhaps instead I will get a ring for my right hand or I was thinking of just getting a big chunky eternity ring to wear to alternate between the two.

You do know nobody’s comparing rings, right?

They absolutely do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's tacky that you considered yourself "young and poor" and still had a 1.25 carat diamond in your engagement ring.

Don't forget the 1 carat in the eternity band. OP is "DCUM poor."

I remember girls saying "if it's not at least one carat, I'm not saying yes." Engagement rings in general are gross. I am a big jewelry fan, but Lord, it's just jewelry. Stop correlating your partner's love, or overlaying with saccharine sentimentality, with a chunk of carbon.

I never had an "engagement ring" only a diamond eternity band. We had the $ to buy something then, but it seemed foolish to waste money on a ring when we didn't even own a house.

Also, I've always found the engagement ring hunger games off putting.

I'm very happily married, in part because I never equated my husband's love with the jewelry he bought me. It's just jewelry. It's just "stuff"

But I love a big fat diamond, so when the lab grown stuff came out, I jumped on it and bought myself a chunky ring I wear on top of my original band.

Real
Diamonds are wasted money, unless you truly have F you money. Easy to lose, slave labor, ya da yada

Anonymous wrote:It's tacky that you considered yourself "young and poor" and still had a 1.25 carat diamond in your engagement ring.

LOL true. Was DH only a baby big law attorney?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did the opposite and downgraded.

DH proposed with a diamond ring he chose himself, and that went best with a matching diamond wedding band. I prefer ultra simple flat bands, so we bought one in his home country shortly after we were married, and that's what I wear. Originals sit in a jewelry box and I can't remember the last time I put them on.

I've been thinking of adopting a simple band myself. I have to clean my engagement ring a lot and when you're tickling/rough housing with the kids you worry about it scratching them.

PP and I find it much more comfortable, fwiw. Doesn't scratch or get caught on things. I feel a little guilty, but...

OP spend the money on therapy instead.

Upgrading because you worry about the "wives of your husband's partners" will say?

Do you live in 1950? You do know women work. In big law. And make lots of money?

Anonymous wrote:Op - I do love my original ring. I just sometimes feel out of place when I am around my DH’s work colleagues and their wives. He is in big law/tech sort of job so everyone makes $$$.

Perhaps instead I will get a ring for my right hand or I was thinking of just getting a big chunky eternity ring to wear to alternate between the two.

You do know nobody’s comparing rings, right?

No, and my engagement ring cost $500 18 years ago. When I look at it, I remember how excited I was to marry my husband. I’ve got many nice pieces since, but the ring that I wear next to my wedding ring will be the engagement ring I got years ago.

I’ve thought about it many times but came to the conclusion that my ring is sentimental. It’s 1.5 cts and I have an eternity band. I mostly wear the eternity band and only wear the engagement ring when I’m more dressed up.

I could definitely upgrade but why waste the money when I’m perfectly happy and secure with what I have.

Do what makes you happy though.

Anonymous wrote:I did the opposite and downgraded.

DH proposed with a diamond ring he chose himself, and that went best with a matching diamond wedding band. I prefer ultra simple flat bands, so we bought one in his home country shortly after we were married, and that's what I wear. Originals sit in a jewelry box and I can't remember the last time I put them on.

I've been thinking of adopting a simple band myself. I have to clean my engagement ring a lot and when you're tickling/rough housing with the kids you worry about it scratching them.

I did the opposite and downgraded.

DH proposed with a diamond ring he chose himself, and that went best with a matching diamond wedding band. I prefer ultra simple flat bands, so we bought one in his home country shortly after we were married, and that's what I wear. Originals sit in a jewelry box and I can't remember the last time I put them on.

Anonymous wrote:Op - I do love my original ring. I just sometimes feel out of place when I am around my DH’s work colleagues and their wives. He is in big law/tech sort of job so everyone makes $$$.

Perhaps instead I will get a ring for my right hand or I was thinking of just getting a big chunky eternity ring to wear to alternate between the two.

I'm a lawyer/tech person myself and I find this attitude of wives wanting to show off kind of funny because the women who work in these fields don't do that. And we're the ones making the money.

It reminds me of when my Dad was a Navy officer and some of the wives would try to use their husband's rank, including over female officers.

Anonymous wrote:It's tacky that you considered yourself "young and poor" and still had a 1.25 carat diamond in your engagement ring.

Don't forget the 1 carat in the eternity band. OP is "DCUM poor."