Anonymous wrote:The menopausal women I know who are very slim eat like birds. I mean very few calories per day.

The ones I know who eat like birds don't seem very healthy. They are too thin, and when they get sick, they become skeletal. You have to have some muscle at least. Maintain a healthy weight, even if it's a little higher than it was when you were in college. I weighed 135 when I got married 35 years ago, and now I weigh 158 pounds. I was a size 6, and now I'm a size 12-14. I feel like I'm at a healthy weight. I'm not heavy, not thin either. Just right, IMHO, for someone my age. I eat a very healthy diet and I exercise, lift weights, walk, swim, ride bikes, but I don't go crazy with exercise either. No alcohol and very little sugar. But I do not have the body I had 10 years ago. It's different, and I'm OK with it. I think I look just fine.

Anonymous wrote:Age 53, still get periods, on low dose HRT for five years (150 progesterone, estrodial/DHEA cream and Estrogen suppositories)... According to blood work, hormones levels indicate very close to menopause.

I've always been slim with a flat stomach and narrow waist. My body is transforming into "old lady" with thickening waist and redistribution of fat. And I'm getting very hungry, TBH. Craving things I used to easily avoid: ice cream, sub sandwiches, etc. I've only gained 5 pounds (so far) but my body shape is definitely changing.

Question: Do I just buy new pants and accept old lady body, or can I get back to my former slimness? I want to be able to enjoy life and not be eating salads for the next few decades.

Yes, OP. You must accept that your body is going to look different. I had a flat tummy, slim waist, round butt. Now, my butt is flat and my waist is wide and I have a slight belly. I HATE it, but there's not a whole lot I can do about it besides exercise, which I do regularly. I eat a very healthy diet and do intermittent fasting 2-3 days a week (skip dinner, basically), but I no longer look slim. And I'm hungry a lot, but I'm getting used to that. It's better than getting heavier. The problem is you lose muscle as you age, and your resting metabolism gets slower, so if you keep eating the same diet you've always eaten, you gain weight. You have to cut back on the amount of food you eat even if your diet is very healthy.

I HATE being hungry, but I'm resigned to it. Being overweight is very unhealthy, and I want to live to 100 and be in good health. I now have "old lady" body, but I wear stylish clothing, so that hides it a bit.

I am definitely thicker around the waist than I was pre-menopause, but I still have a waist and am still slim overall. The biggest different in shape is my lower belly -- I don't think I'll ever fully get rid of it. It's just how my body is shaped now. However:

- I don't severely calorie restrict. I do eat less than I used to, and yes it's a conscious choice and sometimes involves self-denial. But not to a degree that is that hard, honestly. I've never been an emotional eater. I make a conscious choice to order salad over pizza, to just have one bite of a shared dessert and no more, to eat very healthful breakfast and lunch (and small servings) daily. I don't feel deprived. When I make these choices, I feel healthy and good. I know some people view any dieting as disordered, but I think of what I do as responsible moderation. I don't count calories.

- I don't drink alcohol. This decision as made while I was in peri-menopause for health reasons unrelated to weight. Drinking just made me feel like crap. Even one drink. It just stopped being worth it. But I think not drinking makes a HUGE difference in my caloric intake, not only because alcohol often has so many calories but because I think drinking makes you eat more (and eat heavier, more caloric foods).

- I am very active. I live in a city and walk most places. I play pickleball multiple times a week. I am on a recreational crew team. My family hikes and bikes for fun. And then on top of that I exercise at home (heavy weights and core work) 3-4 days a week. Most of this is just for fun and overall health, the home workouts are a little bit for health and a lot for vanity. It's a great motivator. And bonus, it's great for muscle mass and bone density.

I like not being fat. But I don't think I'm doing anything dramatic to avoid it. Just common sense stuff that has the benefit of being healthy anyway.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's impossible to stay the same size we were in our 20's or even 30's, unless you are obsessed with fitness or what you eat. I think it's fine to go up a couple of sizes and increase in weight from that time. I try to walk more often and eat very little in the evening, no snacking. But I would rather enjoy food than obsess over being the size I used to be.

Disagree. There are entire populations where women stay mostly the same size their entire lives.

It’s very American to assume college brings 10 pounds, then another…then more….then not losing the baby weight, etc.

Well, this American woman was 5'4", 128 pounds from age 25 to 52, with the exception of 3 pregnancies. Now I'm 58 and 138. I guess I suddenly lost my willpower?

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP- I’m 56–but next month will finally be 1 year without a period.

What both my sister and I found (and many friends) was that year right before periods stop for good was when it felt like weight just kept easily packing on—but once things settled weight gain stopped and we were able to lose most of that weight again-neither with glps or HRT.

I never took HRT because I never had hot flashes or awful symptoms. My sister and two best friends were similar.

It will seem like you are on the bullet train to fatsville—but then things settle. My energy and mood also were so much improved once transition was over. I’m so much calmer now. That lower cortisol is probably part of it…and hormones like the Pill always had me bloated. I never get bloated anymore which is great. I certainly don’t want those hormonal symptoms back,

Thank you-- this gives me hope. I feel like I am in that phase of 1 glass of wine or 3 chips gives me a belly that I could usually pretty easily lose by working out. I am 48, if that matters.

OP - I could’ve written your post. I’ve always been able to eat whatever I want and never gain a pound. Now 50 and that’s no longer the case.

I know what needs to be done. Eat healthy foods. I do but then there’s the extra.

Besides accepting, maybe another question is how to keep disciplined with the eating and exercise. Any good accountability coaches you’d recommend? I know it feels silly to pay someone to do what I already know how to do but I’m willing to try it.

Pay for wellness or pay for illness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's impossible to stay the same size we were in our 20's or even 30's, unless you are obsessed with fitness or what you eat. I think it's fine to go up a couple of sizes and increase in weight from that time. I try to walk more often and eat very little in the evening, no snacking. But I would rather enjoy food than obsess over being the size I used to be.

Disagree. There are entire populations where women stay mostly the same size their entire lives.

It’s very American to assume college brings 10 pounds, then another…then more….then not losing the baby weight, etc.

I agree. Grew up in France and all my female relatives stayed slim their entire lives. Was shocking when I met my American husband's family and saw how the women looked almost like men...needless to say that marriage did not last long!

So what’s different about American women do you think?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's impossible to stay the same size we were in our 20's or even 30's, unless you are obsessed with fitness or what you eat. I think it's fine to go up a couple of sizes and increase in weight from that time. I try to walk more often and eat very little in the evening, no snacking. But I would rather enjoy food than obsess over being the size I used to be.

Disagree. There are entire populations where women stay mostly the same size their entire lives.

It’s very American to assume college brings 10 pounds, then another…then more….then not losing the baby weight, etc.

I agree. Grew up in France and all my female relatives stayed slim their entire lives. Was shocking when I met my American husband's family and saw how the women looked almost like men...needless to say that marriage did not last long!

Just eat less, exercise more. You can also get a GLP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The menopausal women I know who are very slim eat like birds. I mean very few calories per day.

I wonder if they're intentionally restricting or if it is just that the body requires fewer calories with age.

Intentionally restricting. Eating less because the body requires less comes later, like 80+.