Anonymous wrote:I pushed ahead with my friends from before I divorced. So what if you're the odd one out? If they don't invite you, then you should be the one to organize the group to do things.

I think that limiting yourself to just single moms is unrealistic. People don't socialize along those lines. They are either people whose company you enjoy or not. Their marital status isn't the main driver of whether you gel as a group. And for people who are of an age where they have children living at home, most socializing is centered on the kids.

Are you looking for single moms to hang out with when you don't have your kids, or when you do have your kids? IOW, do you want to spend adults-only time with these single moms, or do you want to spend moms-only time with fellow moms and their kids? As someone above said, it's going to be hard to coordinate around kids/no-kids time given that everyone's custody times could differ.

Anonymous wrote:Don’t know either and wish I had one. Surprised there are no meet up groups specifically for single moms especially ones navigating divorce. Most groups seem focused on dating. OP—maybe start a group via meetup or next door?

Anonymous wrote:The married moms excluding single moms is a real phenomenon. OP- I found a lot of older women friends who had raised their kids and were empty nesters and if still married, were secure with the 15-20 age gap, but mostly we hung out as women.

Anonymous wrote:“I don’t want to hang out with with married moms because they are couples, and I don’t want to hang out with single moms who are focused guys, and I don’t want to hang out with single moms who are focused on their kids, I don’t want to hang out with non-moms because they don’t have the constraints of kids. Why can’t I find single moms as centered on me as I am?”

Anonymous wrote:Just to get the nomenclature correct, if you have an ex who has joint custody of the kids, you aren’t really a “single mom.” You are “divorced mom” or a “co-parent.”

Single moms don’t have another parent at all involved in their children’s lives.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just to get the nomenclature correct, if you have an ex who has joint custody of the kids, you aren’t really a “single mom.” You are “divorced mom” or a “co-parent.”

Single moms don’t have another parent at all involved in their children’s lives.

I have sole legal and physical custody. I think I'll continue calling myself a single mom.

Anonymous wrote:How do I build a new circle as a single mom? The married moms I used to socialize with mostly do couples hangouts at which I'm the odd one out. I'm ok with that, but I don't get invited anymore.

The single moms I meet spend most of their limited free time dating or looking for dates. They seem to want a wingwoman more than anything and will ditch a girls night for last minute first date. I'm fit and girly and love going out, but I'm thrilled not to have a man sucking the life out of me for the first time in 15 years. I don't want to center men in my free time.

The child-free single women I meet are more available and friendly, but they don't like the constraints on my time that come with being a single mom.

I'm lonely for a village of fellow moms who get the mom life and actually want to invest in other women. Moms I can raise kids with and rely on through the ups and downs of single mom life. Not just sporadic hangouts and minimal texting. I didn't have a village as a married woman because my ex was mentally unstable and ran people off on purpose to isolate the kids and I. I don't have one now because it seems most women organize their lives around men. How do I meet other moms who want to raise their kids, have fun with other women, and develop their careers and hobbies?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just to get the nomenclature correct, if you have an ex who has joint custody of the kids, you aren’t really a “single mom.” You are “divorced mom” or a “co-parent.”

Single moms don’t have another parent at all involved in their children’s lives.

Um, no.

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don’t know, but many divorced moms lived in a really nice apartment complex near our kids’ elementary school at first, and they all seemed to socialize and support each other. I certainly wouldn’t suggest a move if you don’t need to, but maybe make friends with someone who is in that situation and get pulled into the group?

I am married but still have no village so am probably not the best to be giving advice. But I always thought they seemed like a tight little group. The apartment complex has a pool and the kids would run around and play together while the moms hung out etc. One of my kids had a friend who lived there and it looked like a lot of fun.