Anonymous
Post 01/30/2026 01:27     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Society is vain.

I have found when I take care of my hair, skin, and wear very nice clothes, people are kinder to me and treat me better overall.

I am in an industry which involves trust, and unfortunately looking good helps.
Anonymous
Post 01/29/2026 22:13     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

I just like being girly. Always have.
Anonymous
Post 01/29/2026 22:11     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Anonymous wrote:Women who are hyper focused on their looks, are they self centered or just trying to hide their low self esteem?


Women who are hyper focused on women who are hyper focused on their looks, are they tiresome, boring, or tiresome and boring?
Anonymous
Post 01/28/2026 10:52     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Can be either. Everyone has a story.
Anonymous
Post 01/28/2026 10:28     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

I love my body and and like to make it look its best, the same way I love my work and want to put out my best work, and I love my house and want it to look its best. So I’m not hyper focused on looks to the exclusion of other things, but I do focus on looks.
Anonymous
Post 01/28/2026 08:44     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Ones who do it because they just like it, can also go out with clean face and non designer objects from time to time. They aren't likely to have fake lashes and acrylic nails all year round.
Anonymous
Post 01/28/2026 07:21     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People who this type of question? Bored or woman hater?


... or just curious and interested in human behavior.


This sort of troll thread comes up here not infrequently.

I always have fun imagining the author. My current theory is that while dropping her kids off at school one morning, Larla sees a super put together mom (fit, nicely styled hair, stylish outfit, nice makeup, maybe with a designer bag and nice jewelry), and felt a flash of jealousy. She wants to make herself feel better, so between meetings she googles “high maintenance women.” Layla doesn’t find an answer that satisfactorily tells her that she’s superior to this “bimbo”, so she resorts to a DCUM thread to get that confidence boost.

The answer: they just like beauty and fashion, OP. You can too. If you’re curious on how to up your game, just ask for help.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2026 14:17     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it is hyper focusing to put in some effort to look like a better version of yourself, and now that they're making tinted versions of SPF, blush, and lip color it's also skincare.

Also for better or worse, I have found that the world treats me exceptionally well when I put in effort which can be helpful when things go awry, such as at the airport. It's not that the world isn't normally nice, but it's wonderfully helpful when I look better than I do when I'm just lounging happily at home.


Same here, and honestly when I have looked my worst (which has happened at intervals: awful bullied teen years, frumpiness as a young mom, weight gain and skin issues during peri...) was when I probably thought about my looks the most and was my most shallow. It's a lot easier for me not to be hyper focused on looks when I have a good routine, do it and move on because I then feel confident and can spend time thinking about other things, which includes the "inner" things the other poster mentioned above.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2026 13:16     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Taking care of yourself and being hyper focused on looks are two different categories.


But where is the line? I know many women who take a great care of themselves, they are skinny, fit, eat healthy, take a good care of their finances, but they never color their hair, nails, eyebrows, they rarely put make up, so if you see them in public many of them would be judged for not taking care of themselves.


What do you do for insides (body, mind, soul) vs outsides?
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2026 12:40     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Anonymous wrote:Taking care of yourself and being hyper focused on looks are two different categories.


But where is the line? I know many women who take a great care of themselves, they are skinny, fit, eat healthy, take a good care of their finances, but they never color their hair, nails, eyebrows, they rarely put make up, so if you see them in public many of them would be judged for not taking care of themselves.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2026 12:37     Subject: High maintenance or low self esteem?

Anonymous wrote:Women who are hyper focused on their looks, are they self centered or just trying to hide their low self esteem?


I think it is a combination of low self-esteem and vanity prevailing over other values that were never instilled into them. They not necessary self centered, as many of them do things for others.