I buy from the Real Real when I know it’s likely I won’t wear something more than once and then can spend some of the savings on good tailoring

Ha, I wonder if the party I'm thinking of is the same party, totally possible. If so, this query makes loads of sense. Something like this:

https://shop.kayunger.com/collections/all/products/amelie-midi-dress-in-mulberry-multi?_pos=16&_fid=fb6ca3490&_ss=c

https://shop.kayunger.com/collections/all/products/devin-midi-dress-in-blue-opal-multi?_pos=29&_fid=fb6ca3490&_ss=c

https://www.saksfifthavenue.com/product/kay-unger-beckett-monet-jacquard-midi-dress-0400020821699.html?dwvar_0400020821699_color=DARK%20INK%20CERISE

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two ideas for something OP might like and keep forever.

“Lady tux” - options at Talbots and Ann Taylor. Luxury options from Ann Mashburn and designer-designers.

The other is a sleeveless black dress and a glittery top to wear off or on. The model here is very young, but I love this idea of a special shrug or shirt to transform a go-anywhere black basic.


https://www.annanyc.com/shop/p/matagot-top

My favorite tuxedo look for inspiration, cheaper at the other stores listed above -

https://shopmashburn.com/products/ann-mashburn-tuxedo-jacket-black-wool-barathea-s78427

Both looks are pretty “buy it for life” and good at any age IMO. Have fun OP!!

That’s out of her price range and the crop top sweater scares me because she’s busty.

Sorry, I meant the idea of the tuxedo! I think the Wardrobe Oxygen blogger has multiple tuxes from Talbots and BR within the range and of reputed good quality.

The lady tuxedo really only works on tall very thin women with high heels and perfect makeup. No offense OP but I don’t think it’s the look for you based on your description (it doesn’t work for me either)

Yeah I associate the look with Victoria Beckham.

The real real

For the gown, I stumbled on a store at the mall called Hobbs which had the perfect dress for me on sale! And I got a simple black dress below the knee at Nordstrom that I wore with a sparkly shawl. As cocktail attire, one of the guests wore a very loose, very shiny suit (over a camisole) that looked amazing but would not have worked for me. With heavy make up and good hair, I did ok, people!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think black pants and a dressy top counts as cocktail attire, depending on the crowd.

Absolutely. I attended two cocktail parties over the holidays and at each one, the most fashionable women were wearing dressy pants and gorgeous tops. Some had on chic dresses. The frumpiest were the ones who went overboard and wore dresses that were meant for a black-tie occasion.

DP. Totally agree.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think black pants and a dressy top counts as cocktail attire, depending on the crowd.

Absolutely. I attended two cocktail parties over the holidays and at each one, the most fashionable women were wearing dressy pants and gorgeous tops. Some had on chic dresses. The frumpiest were the ones who went overboard and wore dresses that were meant for a black-tie occasion.

I cannot remember ever being at a cocktail event and seeing an older woman looking fashionable in pants and a top. In general it’s a frumpy lady wearing baggy black pants and a “blouse” that would not look good even for work wear. It’s definitely possible to wear pants and look nice for cocktail dressing but I think it’s rare; much easier to wear a simple black dress or something. If you enjoy dressing nicely it’s a chance to wear something pretty and fun.

It all depends on the fit

A dress can age you as well

Women tend to not get their clothes tailored

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tuckernuck


https://tnuck.com/collections/cocktail-dresses

Just make sure to muck out the stalls when you’re done churning the butter. Those are the ugliest milkmaid dresses I’ve seen. Certainly educated women with jobs don’t wear that crap.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think black pants and a dressy top counts as cocktail attire, depending on the crowd.

Absolutely. I attended two cocktail parties over the holidays and at each one, the most fashionable women were wearing dressy pants and gorgeous tops. Some had on chic dresses. The frumpiest were the ones who went overboard and wore dresses that were meant for a black-tie occasion.

I cannot remember ever being at a cocktail event and seeing an older woman looking fashionable in pants and a top. In general it’s a frumpy lady wearing baggy black pants and a “blouse” that would not look good even for work wear. It’s definitely possible to wear pants and look nice for cocktail dressing but I think it’s rare; much easier to wear a simple black dress or something. If you enjoy dressing nicely it’s a chance to wear something pretty and fun.

Anonymous wrote:I think black pants and a dressy top counts as cocktail attire, depending on the crowd.

Absolutely. I attended two cocktail parties over the holidays and at each one, the most fashionable women were wearing dressy pants and gorgeous tops. Some had on chic dresses. The frumpiest were the ones who went overboard and wore dresses that were meant for a black-tie occasion.

Here's some more information for the lady who is stuck in a time warp:

Cocktail attire is like the sweet spot between casual and formal. It's a dress code that allows you to break the black-tie rules while still looking put-together. When you see "cocktail attire" on the dress code, remember that this is your signal to keep it classy and avoid anything too casual or revealing.

We usually look for ways to combine elegance and flair, whether that's a compliment-worthy dress or a power pantsuit. A cocktail dress code offers the opportunity to play around with different fabrics, colors, and prints to showcase your personal style.

https://www.whowhatwear.com/cocktail-attire-for-women

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think black pants and a dressy top counts as cocktail attire, depending on the crowd.

No, it doesn’t.

Cocktail attire is knee length or above dress or nice skirt. I’d never NEVER wear pants or a “dressy” top (whatever that is).

Are you joining us from the 1950s? You can't be serious. Cocktail attire can absolutely be all of the above - pants/dressy top and/or jacket in addition to skirts or dresses of all lengths.

"What does cocktail attire look like today?
What's appropriate for a cocktail attire dress code can vary depending on the occasion, the time of year, and even the hosts. But there are some key rules to keep in mind. While you can undoubtedly wear trousers, consider leaving the denim in your closet and pairing your pants with a dressier silk top or one that has a more sophisticated silhouette than a basic t-shirt.

When it comes to dresses, the length can depend on the style. A long or midi dress is appropriate with a sleeker silhouettes (let’s stay away from the ball gowns). And a shorter dress can also work but keep the occasion in mind with the length."

https://www.vogue.com/article/cocktail-hour-guide-dress-code

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think black pants and a dressy top counts as cocktail attire, depending on the crowd.

No, it doesn’t.

Cocktail attire is knee length or above dress or nice skirt. I’d never NEVER wear pants or a “dressy” top (whatever that is).

Nice you have the legs for that. Some of us don't wear dresses at all, yet we go in cocktail attire and even to black tie events. My legs are very scarred.

Anonymous wrote:Just go to Macy's and try stuff one. They have like hundreds of cocktail dresses, all of them out on the floor together.

+1
They are inexpensive, especially on sale, and a huge selection of all style preferences - except the milkmaid style that another poster suggests.

Anonymous wrote:Tuckernuck


https://tnuck.com/collections/cocktail-dresses

Just make sure to muck out the stalls when you’re done churning the butter. Those are the ugliest milkmaid dresses I’ve seen. Certainly educated women with jobs don’t wear that crap.