Anonymous
Post 01/11/2026 12:05     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anyone held off coming home on time or before 6:30pm or 7pm or 8pm in order to skip kid stuff or dinner stuff?
Anonymous
Post 01/11/2026 11:49     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
My spouse retired four years ago and has not done squat - just sitting around and playing with her phone. I have tons of activities planned when I retire, including a part time job. Nothing is going to stop me after 40 years in the workforce
Anonymous
Post 01/11/2026 05:15     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:I enjoy time reconnecting with DH.

I will work until I can’t because it’s what I enjoy too. I find comfort in some purpose greater than myself. Something I contribute to accomplishing however small.

I’m not avoiding him, I’m avoiding the reality the arc of life - death. There is beauty in living and feeling alive.


You can’t avoid death!
Anonymous
Post 01/11/2026 02:26     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
I enjoy time reconnecting with DH.

I will work until I can’t because it’s what I enjoy too. I find comfort in some purpose greater than myself. Something I contribute to accomplishing however small.

I’m not avoiding him, I’m avoiding the reality the arc of life - death. There is beauty in living and feeling alive.
Anonymous
Post 01/11/2026 01:12     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My spouse and I are both retired (early) and we just lead largely separate lives. It works for us. No way in hell I'd keep working just to avoid a spouse. You shouldn't let any other human being have that much power over you. You only have one life.


I continue to work in anticipation of a private equity exit. I'm not working to avoid my spouse. Once I'm done with my current job, i'm wondering if I should get another one or develop a serious volunteer commitment to avoid spending too much time with my spouse. He likes to go long stretches without talking, he and I do not share the same political views, I am higher energy. I enjoy him in small doses, like for 3 hours a night, but worry about unlimited time. You know the saying, "I married for better or worse, but not for lunch"?


lol this is an amazing quote!


Attributed to Maryon Pearson, spouse of a Canadian prime minister who had just retired


That's an old saying. My friend's late mother used to say, "I married you for better or for worse but not for retirement "
Anonymous
Post 01/11/2026 00:15     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:That's pretty wild OP. We both retired same time because we wanted to spend more time together. I can't even imagine...


OP here. H has been retired over 4 years and hasn't done a blessed thing. No solo travel, no volunteering. A lot of bike riding and drinking. I would rather be at the office.


Stay busy whether retired or not.

Use it or lose it (muscles, curiosity, brain, skills, conversating, etc.)
Anonymous
Post 01/10/2026 22:23     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:I'd divorce someone who retired to sit around surfing MAGA crap online. Life's too short.


I did. Agree
Anonymous
Post 01/10/2026 21:56     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
I'd divorce someone who retired to sit around surfing MAGA crap online. Life's too short.
Anonymous
Post 01/10/2026 21:51     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:Work until I die. Don't wanna spend any more time with her than I have to. Too much stress and depression.


Dayum.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2026 21:43     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:Live separately but get condos in same neighborhood to visit each other and do joint activities when you both feel like it.


The problem with this is that you are essentially single. And at a certain point, one or the other may find someone else. Especially a spouse who historically had most domestic stuff taken care of.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2026 20:21     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My spouse and I are both retired (early) and we just lead largely separate lives. It works for us. No way in hell I'd keep working just to avoid a spouse. You shouldn't let any other human being have that much power over you. You only have one life.


I continue to work in anticipation of a private equity exit. I'm not working to avoid my spouse. Once I'm done with my current job, i'm wondering if I should get another one or develop a serious volunteer commitment to avoid spending too much time with my spouse. He likes to go long stretches without talking, he and I do not share the same political views, I am higher energy. I enjoy him in small doses, like for 3 hours a night, but worry about unlimited time. You know the saying, "I married for better or worse, but not for lunch"?


You're contradicting yourself. You say you're not working to avoid your spouse, then you say you'd keep working to avoid your spouse.


Her husband is avoiding her because she had a split personality disorder.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2026 19:44     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:That's pretty wild OP. We both retired same time because we wanted to spend more time together. I can't even imagine...


OP here. H has been retired over 4 years and hasn't done a blessed thing. No solo travel, no volunteering. A lot of bike riding and drinking. I would rather be at the office.


A lot of bike riding and drinking -> sounds like doing something to me.

maybe you should go back to work and let your H enjoy himself.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2026 13:05     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Work until I die. Don't wanna spend any more time with her than I have to. Too much stress and depression.
Anonymous
Post 01/02/2026 16:18     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is just sad. Why not retire and synchronize your schedules to improve your relationship. Do travel, hobbies and volunteering together to keep yourselves active and engaged.


I want to travel and volunteer. My husband has been retired for over 4 years and is not interested in either. He likes to bike and drink and surf right wing content on his iPad. My hobbies besides volunteering are bookclub, pickleball, and going out with friends.


So you can retire and travel and volunteer, and he can stay home if he's not interested in joining you. You don't need work as an excuse to avoid him.

Or are you worried that he'll try and tag along, and run your experience?


No he won't ruin the travel experience, it's just so awkward though.
Anonymous
Post 01/02/2026 16:05     Subject: Has anyone held off retiring because they don't want to spend tons of time with their spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is just sad. Why not retire and synchronize your schedules to improve your relationship. Do travel, hobbies and volunteering together to keep yourselves active and engaged.


I want to travel and volunteer. My husband has been retired for over 4 years and is not interested in either. He likes to bike and drink and surf right wing content on his iPad. My hobbies besides volunteering are bookclub, pickleball, and going out with friends.


So you can retire and travel and volunteer, and he can stay home if he's not interested in joining you. You don't need work as an excuse to avoid him.

Or are you worried that he'll try and tag along, and run your experience?