OP, I have been where you are. The whole "you have to get them while they're still in the pleasing stage" freaked me out because I don't think my kid was physically ready at that age. It finally clicked right around 3 and we dealt with some poop withholding for a bit longer but eventually that worked itself out too. It wasn't anything we did, it was the kid being ready. Yours will be at some point too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I trained both my boys before age 2. About 20-21 months.

We used o crap but your daughter might be a bit old for that method. That method is intended for 20-30 months of age. Girls are often trained at 18-24 months and many people wait later for boys.

The closer you get to age 3 the harder it gets. You want to train when they are still in the pleasing stage. 3 is notoriously hard.

3 is mostly hard if you powerstruggled earlier and failed. If you wait till 3 it’s usually a breeze.

Op here - we have had that struggle, I guess I will have to expect her to be more resistant next time?

Anonymous wrote:2 boys, both just before 2. This was based on the Oh Crap book and I caught them "in time" and it was very easy.

My 2 biggest takeaways from the book:

- The attitude of the parent matters as much (or more) as the "readiness" of the child.
- Parents get frustrated and give up really, really easily when things don't go well after a few days.

OP - bringing this back to your situation. I would read the book again and focus on the parts about avoiding power struggles, and instilling confidence in your child.

You can do this! So can she!

Op here Thank you I took the book advice but really struggled to manage those power struggles after a week it became overwhelming. I will read through again ahead of our next try

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I trained both my boys before age 2. About 20-21 months.

We used o crap but your daughter might be a bit old for that method. That method is intended for 20-30 months of age. Girls are often trained at 18-24 months and many people wait later for boys.

The closer you get to age 3 the harder it gets. You want to train when they are still in the pleasing stage. 3 is notoriously hard.

3 is mostly hard if you powerstruggled earlier and failed. If you wait till 3 it’s usually a breeze.

Or you could wait til middle school and tell them you're going to take their phone away if they don't use the toilet.

2 boys, both just before 2. This was based on the Oh Crap book and I caught them "in time" and it was very easy.

My 2 biggest takeaways from the book:

- The attitude of the parent matters as much (or more) as the "readiness" of the child.
- Parents get frustrated and give up really, really easily when things don't go well after a few days.

OP - bringing this back to your situation. I would read the book again and focus on the parts about avoiding power struggles, and instilling confidence in your child.

You can do this! So can she!

My 3 kids all did it super early with no/minimal effort on our part.
DD1 trained a before turning 2
DD2 at 2
DS at maybe 25 months.

All super easy. That said, my middle child wore a night diaper until 6 while the other two were night trained around 2/2.5.

Started around 20 months was daytime trained before two . Nighttime is a diffrent story almost seven and still wears a pull-up to bed . Well get there eventually .

Waited till 2 months before 3. Daycare said she was ready. Took 2 days.

Anonymous wrote:I trained both my boys before age 2. About 20-21 months.

We used o crap but your daughter might be a bit old for that method. That method is intended for 20-30 months of age. Girls are often trained at 18-24 months and many people wait later for boys.

The closer you get to age 3 the harder it gets. You want to train when they are still in the pleasing stage. 3 is notoriously hard.

3 is mostly hard if you powerstruggled earlier and failed. If you wait till 3 it’s usually a breeze.

We tried around 2.5 with my first child (had him go naked for a day, used star charts, and so on), and while he understood the concept and would pee in the potty sporadically, the results were inconsistent. We gave up, and around 3.5 it just “clicked,” and he was fully day trained of his own accord within that one day. No day accidents.

With my second and third, we had all the accoutrements (potty books, potty seats, stools to reach the big potty, etc) available, and they obviously saw their older sibling using the potty. Even so, both kids used it sporadically until 3.5, almost on the dot, at which point it “clicked”, they asked for underwear, and had 0 and 2 day accidents thereafter.

I trained both my boys before age 2. About 20-21 months.

We used o crap but your daughter might be a bit old for that method. That method is intended for 20-30 months of age. Girls are often trained at 18-24 months and many people wait later for boys.

The closer you get to age 3 the harder it gets. You want to train when they are still in the pleasing stage. 3 is notoriously hard.

Right when they turn 3. It will take a couple of days

First kid - attempted at 2 ended in failure; 2nd attempt at 2.5 - very successful because he was motivated to get rid of diapers; finished training in 2 days.
2nd kid - very tough child compared to my oldest, so I kept on waiting until his daycare teacher encouraged me to try at 2.5; took around 3-4 months to be completely trained at home and in public.

I was lucky my oldest was easy and got it done so quickly. It helped with my 2nd child because I learned how to train using a method I liked. It gave me confidence to look for progress and realize that while his training was going at a much slower pace than his older sibling, he was making enough progress for me to keep pushing through. If I had not had previous experience I would have quit within a week.

mine started using the potty casually while filling the tub around 20 months and then would try other times per day.... she was very into it... at 26 months we did a weekend in undies focused on it but then weren't super consistent after (diapers for playground times, naps, etc) and she'd oftenhave accidents but never poop accidents so she stuck it out.. a little before 3 she started preschool and has never had an accident there and proudly comes home asking for her "stay dry" candy every day now...

still pees and poops in overnight diaper

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