It’s his choice.

Anonymous wrote:Isn't this a kid who should be pursuing a trade and not going to college?

Trade schools are, well, schools. The community colleges require all the basic classes on top of your skilled trade, same as four year colleges.

A lot of kids this age have no idea what they want. If he knows that he’s interested in as engineering job he could commute to a community college and get a two year degree in mechanical engineering for example.

He will meet kids at the local school and might end up enjoying school enough to go on to the four year degree. Sounds like a good plan.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS who has severe ADHD and hates school, wants to live at home and commute. He is very social and I am trying to figure out if we should just have him go the Junior College route or find a school that allows commuters. I am worried that when all his friends leave for college that he is going to feel very isolated.

If living in NoVA, then GMU might be an option. GMU does require all students to live on campus 1st year, but he could come home on weekends and he would have nearby family as a support system. At GMU, all students are seeking a 4-year degree, which is a better environment if the goal is a 4-yr degree.

NVCC is the other nearby VA option. The demographics are very different. Many students at NVCC are just trying to get a technician-level certificate, not even an AS degree.

I just want to clarify the above comment. Freshman who live within 45 miles of GMU with their parents or legal guardians can get an exemption and be commuters. They are not required to live on campus freshman year. The policy is to prevent students from getting their own apartment before sophomore year and making a poor transition to college. They are not going to force students who live within commuting distance with their parents to spend more money and pay for room and board.

Exceptions are also granted for married students, parents, veterans, and anyone 21 or older.

Every kid is different and no one can impose their journey or their kid’s journey on someone else’s kid. I don’t see anything wrong with your kid staying at home- as long as it’s what the kid wants and goes into it with both eyes open to the pros and cons. This isn’t the same thing, but I was concerned when my kid wanted to stay in-state when I had gone to a college several states away from my home state. But I shared my concerns about the pros and pitfalls, let them make the decision and so far it has been what they want.

I think if there is a 4-year college that's appropriate for him and in commutable distance, it's a good option. He may feel like he's not ready to go out on his own. It saves money too. I know a number of students who have lived at home while going to college (especially kids of immigrant parents, where in their home countries this is typical). Obviously, it's easier if you are in a relatively dense metropolitan area with multiple college that are a reasonable commute.

My DS has a friend who goes to a university about an hour away (and get can there via public transportation). He has a dorm on campus, but he comes home every single weekend. I think he just likes being home and having his parents cook for him and everything, and not much of a partier. So that may be an alternative.

I would also consider if you feel like you would be pressuring him to live on campus for reasons of your own. A lot of parents assume their kid will go away, and plan accordingly. Meaning if he's your last or only and you thought you'd have an empty nest, and now you won't, or even if you have other kids at home but you thought you'd lose the daily workload of caring for another person daily, and now you won't--think about if that is affecting your motivation about having him go away.

Of course we love our kids and miss them when they're gone, but there is definitely more parenting when they are physically at home vs. when they are not.

I did this as did some of my friends. We were not losers. I was not ready to move away from home. It kept me safe and within bounds. When I did transfer I was much more motivated and a better student by that time too. I was able to take all the general ed requirements and be done with them before I transfered. My friends did fine too. It is a good option for many, especially if they are asking to do it by choice as I did. My degree and diploma are from the four-year school. I went to grad school and have had a good career.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People in community college still have friends.

From what I've seen, they often get dragged down by loser friends from high school who are still hanging around their hometown with no ambition beyond drinking, doing drugs, and chasing girls who are still in high school. I'm not saying it always happens, but it's a huge risk when your kid doesn't go away to college and find new playmates.

Honest question. Is this what you have seen or some stereotype you came up with in your head?

Could that have been written by a bot? No one talks like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People in community college still have friends.

From what I've seen, they often get dragged down by loser friends from high school who are still hanging around their hometown with no ambition beyond drinking, doing drugs, and chasing girls who are still in high school. I'm not saying it always happens, but it's a huge risk when your kid doesn't go away to college and find new playmates.

Honest question. Is this what you have seen or some stereotype you came up with in your head?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People in community college still have friends.

From what I've seen, they often get dragged down by loser friends from high school who are still hanging around their hometown with no ambition beyond drinking, doing drugs, and chasing girls who are still in high school. I'm not saying it always happens, but it's a huge risk when your kid doesn't go away to college and find new playmates.

“Playmates” sorry, what???

2 years school that is close to home. o need to push.