Anonymous
10/04/2025 19:13
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Find a social group where other parents feel the way you do.
I don’t know any teenagers who want mommy picking their friends.
That’s literally what happens when you pick a school.
Your children must be very young. Mine is going to homecoming in a big group tonight. She’s not a student at the school and the group has kids from different schools. It’s why schools have guest forms for dances. No, kids are not only friends with kids from their school. It’s common, especially in this area.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 19:09
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Buckle up folks. Guess what you let them have it, you’re monitoring it, they get sick of it early on.
Mom of 22 and 18 year olds. They’re back into hanging out in person, low social media use
Mom of 22 and 18 year olds. They’re back into hanging out in person, low social media use
Anonymous
10/04/2025 18:44
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:[list]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You can’t and a complete ban until she is 16 is unrealistic. She will be in HS and might want to join a club or be on a sports team. Social media is used.
Even if you somehow have the one kid who listens to your rules and doesn’t create one of her own, you can’t stop her from being in friends Tik Toks. Do you care about that too?
I’m happy with anything after 14, the later the better. TikTok is the worst in my opinion. I don’t want her on that one at all.
Why?
TikTok is nothing but trash. But you can’t stop her from having an account. She’ll use her friend’s phone or she’ll hid the App on her phone when she gets one. It’s better to be honest, it’s not going anywhere anytime soon. Ask her what she likes about the App. Explain how she can detect lies, if she is looking for news give her a list of reputable news sources like NPR or BBC. Discuss the fakeness of videos, how so many girls filter their faces and bodies and look nothing like them when they’re finished.
Banning popular things doesn’t work.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 18:34
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:The parents who ban it are the ones with kids most obsessed
+100
Forbidden fruit and all that.
It will massively backfire Op. Try being reasonable and not self righteous.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 18:31
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:The parents who ban it are the ones with kids most obsessed
Yes I paint broad strokes for everyone
Anonymous
10/04/2025 17:12
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
It depends on her character, OP. Maybe trust her and keep lines of communication open?
I didn't forbid anything, but I lectured them on the dangers of the internet, cyberbullying, grooming, basic security issues. They inherited my barely-working iPhones in 8th and 7th grade, then upgraded as I bought new ones over the years.
My 20yo still doesn't have any social media except a LinkedIn; my 15yo made a Discord account at 11 or so, realized it had enormous potential for cyberbullying and other dramas, and hasn't made any other since. She uses the Discord account to private message friends she knows in real life. Neither have TikTok, Insta, etc.
My kids' friends show them all the best crap that rises to the top every week, so they don't have to wade in themselves. And they're also on YouTube, which has excellent, long-form (not crap) content if you choose to look for it. It's not as interactive and addictive as other forms of social media, but if you want to absorb some of the same crap, there's always YouTube shorts. So my kids are sufficiently aware of the Zeitgeist that they're not out of the loop.
I didn't forbid anything, but I lectured them on the dangers of the internet, cyberbullying, grooming, basic security issues. They inherited my barely-working iPhones in 8th and 7th grade, then upgraded as I bought new ones over the years.
My 20yo still doesn't have any social media except a LinkedIn; my 15yo made a Discord account at 11 or so, realized it had enormous potential for cyberbullying and other dramas, and hasn't made any other since. She uses the Discord account to private message friends she knows in real life. Neither have TikTok, Insta, etc.
My kids' friends show them all the best crap that rises to the top every week, so they don't have to wade in themselves. And they're also on YouTube, which has excellent, long-form (not crap) content if you choose to look for it. It's not as interactive and addictive as other forms of social media, but if you want to absorb some of the same crap, there's always YouTube shorts. So my kids are sufficiently aware of the Zeitgeist that they're not out of the loop.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 16:58
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
The parents who ban it are the ones with kids most obsessed with social media. You are better off allowing it, but talking with your kid a lot about how to use it responsibly, what not to do, etc. Kids need to learn how to make good decisions.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 16:56
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
The parents who ban it are the ones with kids most obsessed
Anonymous
10/04/2025 16:34
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Find a social group where other parents feel the way you do.
I don’t know any teenagers who want mommy picking their friends.
That’s literally what happens when you pick a school.
Please, tell me about this private high school where none of the teens are on social media and all of the kids are one big happy social group.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 16:27
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Find a social group where other parents feel the way you do.
I don’t know any teenagers who want mommy picking their friends.
That’s literally what happens when you pick a school.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 16:23
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Assuming the computer that she would use is an Apple product, make her an Apple ID that is sub of yours. So then on the computer have two users, you and her. Don’t let her know your password, so she can only use her account on the computer. Then you can use Apple parental controls to block certain websites. You can also limit the amount of time on particular websites, if you want. Plus, you can monitor her search history.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 16:07
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:Find a social group where other parents feel the way you do.
I don’t know any teenagers who want mommy picking their friends.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 15:55
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
What will you do when your kid goes to college?
OP let your kid grow then again you suck as a parent because you are way too controlling.
OP let your kid grow then again you suck as a parent because you are way too controlling.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 15:21
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You can’t and a complete ban until she is 16 is unrealistic. She will be in HS and might want to join a club or be on a sports team. Social media is used.
Even if you somehow have the one kid who listens to your rules and doesn’t create one of her own, you can’t stop her from being in friends Tik Toks. Do you care about that too?
I’m happy with anything after 14, the later the better. TikTok is the worst in my opinion. I don’t want her on that one at all.
Wait until you learn what else is online. TikTok will look like candy then.
Anonymous
10/04/2025 13:02
Subject: Enforcing no social media rule
This is why we don’t allow sleepovers in middle school anymore - bc all they do is use screens inappropriately anyway.