Anonymous
Post 08/04/2025 09:22     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s hard OP. RTO for me meant a 90 minutes each way commute to a place I’d never worked before and turned my family’s life upside down.

It is very, very tough. While on one hand, yes I am physically able to get to the office and “work” each day, it is destroying my productivity and physical and mental health, affecting my relationships with my kids and family, and just making life absolutely miserable. But the people in charge now do not care about those things. They want us to be miserable and quit. Many of us are stuck between a rock and a hard place. My kids are teens; it would be devastating for them to have to pick up and move to a new area, and near impossible to find a good enough paying other job in this market.

So I do like many women have for thousands of years: put up with it, put my own physical and mental needs behind those of others, and just hope it will get better before I drop dead.

I’m also not sure it is worth it to stay in the fed workforce just because of the pension.
If I could, I would quit, move far away to lower COL area, and just start over in a new job, but that would really hurt my kids.


You think it doesn't impact men too? I don't get why women make it just about women.


Ok, so this is a parenting forum, and I am a mother. RTO impacts mothers especially. Remote work (zero commute) was the first time I ever had enough time and energy to give 100% at work and also be 100% of the mother I wanted to be and also had time to take care of myself. And I experienced much less anxiety while WFH and was able to really advance in my career, for the first time in my life.

I know there are exceptions but I am not seeing a lot of fathers who are as emotionally as devastated as mothers who had to RTO. I don’t even have little kids. I can’t imagine what it’s like being a parent of an infant with a 3 hour commute.

Remember this is not simply a return to the way things were before.


I had the opposite problem, my family expected me to make $$$ and take care of household chores while at work, and my boss assumes I was slacking off. I tried to prove it but burnt out instead, was packing bags to leave the husband at 3am in year 2021.
Anonymous
Post 08/04/2025 09:10     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:Didn’t agencies like the SEC have a CBA that allows telework 8 days a PP?

Just do religious telework. Opm allows that now.


SEC is in office full time and has been for months.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 22:38     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Didn’t agencies like the SEC have a CBA that allows telework 8 days a PP?

Just do religious telework. Opm allows that now.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 22:31     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Maybe take the offer to buy you more time as a fed? Apply for the RA and use the misery to motivate you to find a really good private sector job but if RTO relaxes maybe you can make it work.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 20:22     Subject: Re:Will RTO be relaxed ever?
OP should leave fed if private pays better. Others will resent you if you get to work remote as a new employee in a fed agency when most of your coworkers are in office 5 days a week.
Also no guarantee if health benefits will be same when you retire in 10 years.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 20:19     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s hard OP. RTO for me meant a 90 minutes each way commute to a place I’d never worked before and turned my family’s life upside down.

It is very, very tough. While on one hand, yes I am physically able to get to the office and “work” each day, it is destroying my productivity and physical and mental health, affecting my relationships with my kids and family, and just making life absolutely miserable. But the people in charge now do not care about those things. They want us to be miserable and quit. Many of us are stuck between a rock and a hard place. My kids are teens; it would be devastating for them to have to pick up and move to a new area, and near impossible to find a good enough paying other job in this market.

So I do like many women have for thousands of years: put up with it, put my own physical and mental needs behind those of others, and just hope it will get better before I drop dead.

I’m also not sure it is worth it to stay in the fed workforce just because of the pension.
If I could, I would quit, move far away to lower COL area, and just start over in a new job, but that would really hurt my kids.


You think it doesn't impact men too? I don't get why women make it just about women.


Ok, so this is a parenting forum, and I am a mother. RTO impacts mothers especially. Remote work (zero commute) was the first time I ever had enough time and energy to give 100% at work and also be 100% of the mother I wanted to be and also had time to take care of myself. And I experienced much less anxiety while WFH and was able to really advance in my career, for the first time in my life.

I know there are exceptions but I am not seeing a lot of fathers who are as emotionally as devastated as mothers who had to RTO. I don’t even have little kids. I can’t imagine what it’s like being a parent of an infant with a 3 hour commute.

Remember this is not simply a return to the way things were before.


Men don’t complain to coworkers and friends they just do what they need to do. My spouse is pissed but there is nothing he can do about it. It’s costing us a fortune in gas and tolls and we’ll need a new car soon. It impacts men, women, parents and those without kids.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 20:14     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Ask the agency to see their telework policy before you can make a decision. Yes everyone is RTO but it is up to each agency’s discretion via a policy what circumstances permit ad box telework. Go from there. A lot of RA are not being approved although I have heard of some folks getting 2 days/week for medical reasons.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 20:00     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
OP if you’re planning to request an RA please be up front about it.


Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:59     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Was coming over here to see what the word is and you asked!

Nothing official but there are believable hints about after January when all DRP is out processed.

I recommend a serious talk with supervisor about your schedule and options. But take the better job if it comes along.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:58     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s hard OP. RTO for me meant a 90 minutes each way commute to a place I’d never worked before and turned my family’s life upside down.

It is very, very tough. While on one hand, yes I am physically able to get to the office and “work” each day, it is destroying my productivity and physical and mental health, affecting my relationships with my kids and family, and just making life absolutely miserable. But the people in charge now do not care about those things. They want us to be miserable and quit. Many of us are stuck between a rock and a hard place. My kids are teens; it would be devastating for them to have to pick up and move to a new area, and near impossible to find a good enough paying other job in this market.

So I do like many women have for thousands of years: put up with it, put my own physical and mental needs behind those of others, and just hope it will get better before I drop dead.

I’m also not sure it is worth it to stay in the fed workforce just because of the pension.
If I could, I would quit, move far away to lower COL area, and just start over in a new job, but that would really hurt my kids.


You think it doesn't impact men too? I don't get why women make it just about women.


Ok, so this is a parenting forum, and I am a mother. RTO impacts mothers especially. Remote work (zero commute) was the first time I ever had enough time and energy to give 100% at work and also be 100% of the mother I wanted to be and also had time to take care of myself. And I experienced much less anxiety while WFH and was able to really advance in my career, for the first time in my life.

I know there are exceptions but I am not seeing a lot of fathers who are as emotionally as devastated as mothers who had to RTO. I don’t even have little kids. I can’t imagine what it’s like being a parent of an infant with a 3 hour commute.

Remember this is not simply a return to the way things were before.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:35     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Its hard to say, many private companies are RTO too. It sucks.


This is OP. So my other potential options (2nd interviews coming up) are 4 private companies. One is fully remote, 3 are Hybrid ranging from 1-3 days in office. None require 5 days in office. But I’d lose my health benefits into retirement and wouldn’t have as many vacation days.



You’ll have to decide what’s important to you. If you go private try to get more $ and invest it for healthcare in the future and put $ in an HRA.

I can’t see the fed going fully remote or even hybrid anytime soon. As a hiring manager if it was clear the role mandated 5 days in office I would
be questioning someone who asked for remote when they got an offer letter. Even if I disagreed with the mandate I would wonder why someone brand new thought that they didn’t need to follow the policy.

It sounds like you can’t do that commute so find a better fit closer to home.

Good luck, OP.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:31     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Try to come back later. It isn’t worth it now. Especially if you don’t want to ask for a RA or if you’re not approved for one.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:17     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Its hard to say, many private companies are RTO too. It sucks.


This is OP. So my other potential options (2nd interviews coming up) are 4 private companies. One is fully remote, 3 are Hybrid ranging from 1-3 days in office. None require 5 days in office. But I’d lose my health benefits into retirement and wouldn’t have as many vacation days.


That's great but my spouse was work from home long before covid and they recalled everyone in January. They commute 60-90 minutes or more one way every day. You do what you have to do. I wouldn't give up health benefits.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:12     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:Its hard to say, many private companies are RTO too. It sucks.


This is OP. So my other potential options (2nd interviews coming up) are 4 private companies. One is fully remote, 3 are Hybrid ranging from 1-3 days in office. None require 5 days in office. But I’d lose my health benefits into retirement and wouldn’t have as many vacation days.
Anonymous
Post 08/03/2025 19:05     Subject: Will RTO be relaxed ever?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I doubt it will get better while Trump is President. You might want to consider moving closer.


Yeah I can’t do that, I do have bonafide medical conditions and could ask for a RA, I’m just not sure if that would make a bad impression right off the bat. I guess I could tell them that before accepting the job. I literally can’t do that kind of commute.


Sure you do


Um. Why would I say that on an anonymous board?


Not PP..and I am happy fur anyone that gets approval for things that make life easier..but there is a sudden uptick in medical conditions in the last few months. Could we just get a blanket all feds have anxiety and sleeping issues. The metro makes everyone nauseous. Add the recent religion exemption and just bring it back for all.