Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:23     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Ah yes the well if she / he had just done what they were told, when they were told and how they were told then I wouldn’t have needed to treat them the way I did. If they don’t want to be treated that way then they need to just do as they are told and when they are told or else they are responsible for my behaviour!
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:19     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My mother in law is one of those women. Everything is my FIL’s fault. If she spills her drink she yells at him, even if he is in the other room. And thats just a simple example.

My wife used to complain about this behavior all the time and has now morphed into the exact same and maybe worse. It will likely be the cause of our marriage ending, as I do not have the bandwidth to accept being treated like this.



Cuz she tripped on his shoes left on the kitchen floor?
Nice.


I am betting you are a lonely miserable person.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:16     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
The psychobabble women are all saints and men are all losers trolls have found this thread
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:10     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
My xH and I had this dynamic. I nagged and yelled a LOT. But like PPs have said about this dynamic, he was basically useless at home and needed constant reminders, nagging, and follow-up to get anything done (and I didn't even have crazy expectations, at one point his sole responsibility was to pick up our dog's poop from the backyard and he would literally go weeks without doing it, to the point the neighbors complained of the smell because the yard was FILLED with poop).

We split and are both much happier. I need someone who takes initiative and has higher standards, he needs someone more go-with-the-flow who is okay with the trash piling up for a couple weeks because he forgot it's trash day.

I think the reason we waited so long to divorce was 1. Thinking we needed to stay together for the kids and 2. Scared we wouldn't find someone else and would be alone. Ultimately it's been better for our kids to have 2 peaceful households than 1 stressful household, and we both date people we're better matched with.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:08     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:There's nothing worse than a shrew. I love my wife, but she can be one. And I think my siblings think she's one and say it behind my back.

So nice of you to stand up for your spouse


Huh? I said I "think" that. I don't "know" it and I wouldn't ask. If I did ask, they'd deny it. So there's nothing to "stand up" to.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:05     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:I thought my MIL (a single mom) was such a nag, but after 20 years with my unreliable husband, I turned into her. Does he enjoy it? Don’t think so, but it’s the only way to get him to do something. I am so exhausted. I had a crush on a coworker because he did what he promised and did not expect lavish praise. I think in a different relationship I would’ve not been a shrew or a nag.
.


Hope you don’t have kids.

Sounds like his mom gave up on him and so would anyone else forced to live with him.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:04     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:There's nothing worse than a shrew. I love my wife, but she can be one. And I think my siblings think she's one and say it behind my back.


Nothing worse than a husband with selective deafness/blindness when it comes to the kids and house.

Best to always sit around and do nothing when family and company is over.
Then when wifey asks you to help or do something for the house or guests or kids, ignore her. Have her ask a few times so she really looks like a shrew.
Then turn around to your friends, parents and siblings and Sigh, and complain about everything you have dealing with. Such a nag.


+1. Works like a charm!
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:03     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have a friend who is a shrew-constantly screaming and nagging her husband.

I can’t stand it but I think her husband kind of gets off on it.

She will scream at him anywhere-at home in front is us, at our house, restaurants.



He has the power to stop any “nagging.”

If he would do what he agreed to do, competently and on time, there’d be nothing to remind or fix or redo or nag him about.

He should try it.

Otherwise, you are semi right. He gets off on not doing things as a petty power & control move, and upsetting his family member.
Is this loving a “shrew”? No. This is about a weak petty man who’s failing to do basic things, trying to deflect and blame a woman.


+1. Can you imagine doing this at work? Just not doing what your role is or what was asked while others are?
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:01     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:Saying a woman is “nagging” is GASLIGHTING. It’s a dismissive term men use to make women feel crazy for holding them accountable to their own words and promises.


Agree


Open your eyes and see what actually is going on BEFORE the “nagging.” You will see misogyny, disrespect, self centeredness, and rudeness over and over towards the woman, from the man.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 12:00     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My friend could have been called a shrew I suppose. Her SIL actually took me aside once to complain to me how she nags him.

But once we were all over and she told him something very specific about a home project "don't move those things there because a, b, c" then she went to get us all coffee. She came back and he was moving the things. She screamed and physically couldn't stop him as she was holding a tray. SIL and I were sitting there watching him stare right through her and not listen to her. That is when the SIL got it. She didn't start with the nag, she wasn't heard.

A decade later there is non of that, he improved his listening skills and she shifted a bit how she talked to him.


A yes the whole well if she had / hadn’t done x, I wouldn’t have had to (insert bad behaviour here) her. Both men and women can blame their bad behaviour on something their spouse did or didn’t do. Both can shirk personal responsibility for their own actions and own bad behaviour.


No, then the guy claims “if she would have asked me nicely I would have done it” and we all stare at him because she did ask nicely for 3-4x and then when what was needed didn’t happen she had to stop and fix everything and was “naggy.”

Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 11:57     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
I thought my MIL (a single mom) was such a nag, but after 20 years with my unreliable husband, I turned into her. Does he enjoy it? Don’t think so, but it’s the only way to get him to do something. I am so exhausted. I had a crush on a coworker because he did what he promised and did not expect lavish praise. I think in a different relationship I would’ve not been a shrew or a nag.
.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 11:57     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My friend could have been called a shrew I suppose. Her SIL actually took me aside once to complain to me how she nags him.

But once we were all over and she told him something very specific about a home project "don't move those things there because a, b, c" then she went to get us all coffee. She came back and he was moving the things. She screamed and physically couldn't stop him as she was holding a tray. SIL and I were sitting there watching him stare right through her and not listen to her. That is when the SIL got it. She didn't start with the nag, she wasn't heard.

A decade later there is non of that, he improved his listening skills and she shifted a bit how she talked to him.


Similar situation here, except without any improvement. Beyond frustrating.


He’s tuned you out because you’re a nag. It’s your fault.


Love those deadweights.

They can’t figure out what to do and can’t handle being told what to do.

So the solution is to continue to do nothing and play the victim.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 11:56     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:My mom was one. You really do get beaten down until it just becomes something that's normal and you accept. It wasn't until college that I really realized how much we were all so submissive to her and walked in egg shells. It was 100% a control and anxiety thing for her.

And for as much as she was a control freak, nagging, emotionally manipulative person....on the outside she was a perfect SAHM. Our house was in immaculate shape. She volunteered for all these activities. My brother and I were top students, athletes, and involved in various things in the community. At home, I would get yelled at for not putting my clothes away correctly, but her friends would marvel about how they could never get their teen daughters to keep their rooms so clean.

So, I don't think my dad particularly liked that my mom was that way. But 1. We were beaten down by her and 2. I think he enjoyed parts of the lifestyle that her behavior provided.

I'm in my early 40s now and my relationship with my mom has been strained since I left the house at 18. My brother is still very close with her, whereas I had trouble getting past the emotionally manipulative parts. When my dad passed a few years ago, she got therapy and went on meds. The control freak shrew part that I grew up with is nearly gone. Now she tells my brother and I how much she regrets how she behaved during our childhood.


Wow. Congrats on your success. Sounds like a typical Asian or SE Asian family in America.

Would you mind telling us how you and your siblings are raising your kids in regards to habits, chores, academics, and extracurriculars?

Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 11:54     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:There's nothing worse than a shrew. I love my wife, but she can be one. And I think my siblings think she's one and say it behind my back.


Nothing worse than a husband with selective deafness/blindness when it comes to the kids and house.

Best to always sit around and do nothing when family and company is over.
Then when wifey asks you to help or do something for the house or guests or kids, ignore her. Have her ask a few times so she really looks like a shrew.
Then turn around to your friends, parents and siblings and Sigh, and complain about everything you have dealing with. Such a nag.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2025 11:53     Subject: Men who like shrewish wives
Look up LinkedIn Lunatics

One of these shrews just threw her husband and his family under the bus . Put it on LinkedIn as an advertisement for her house manager referral business. I wouldn’t trust her to find me garbage .