Anonymous
07/15/2025 18:10
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You are with him why? Work on your self esteem issues.
Because our marriage is good and in a vacuum, his demands don’t seem unreasonable and were easy to comply with. You don’t want me talking to the baseball dads or my dumbass colleagues? That’s fine; I was really just being polite and social and a team player. I’m naturally somewhat introverted, so sitting quietly or ordering room service, or reading if my kid isn’t playing is fine by me.
Frankly, apart from the double standard, I didn’t really care about the woman from softball. I trust(ed?) my husband, and realize I really can’t police him (or anyone) into fidelity. But the deceit about her continued participation has really hit me hard.
But they are unreasonable! You are now eating lunch alone in your office? You have to bring a book to games so no one talks to you? You don't think this is crazy?
Anonymous
07/15/2025 18:00
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You are with him why? Work on your self esteem issues.
Because our marriage is good and in a vacuum, his demands don’t seem unreasonable and were easy to comply with. You don’t want me talking to the baseball dads or my dumbass colleagues? That’s fine; I was really just being polite and social and a team player. I’m naturally somewhat introverted, so sitting quietly or ordering room service, or reading if my kid isn’t playing is fine by me.
Frankly, apart from the double standard, I didn’t really care about the woman from softball. I trust(ed?) my husband, and realize I really can’t police him (or anyone) into fidelity. But the deceit about her continued participation has really hit me hard.
You’re either a troll or have some deep issues. No one and I mean no one should be able to dictate who you talk to. The fact that you say you can’t control him while having no issues with him controlling you should be very concerning.
I wish I was a troll…
My therapist would say he controls me because I allow him to control me. I allow it because the cost of this control is worth have a solid marriage (to me, it might not be worth it to others).
What bothers me is:
1. Double standards. He can have all the female friends he wants. But if that’s what he wants, than that’s what I can have.
2. Deceit. Why lie (either blatantly or by omission) about this woman’s status? I didn’t care that he had female friends.
3. The accusations of cheating. The conversation gets so tiring after awhile.
But, you don’t have a solid marriage. And, you’re making yourself smaller to stay with someone who accuses you (with no proof) of doing horrible things (cheating). And, your “solid marriage” is with someone who sounds/looks like they’ve been cheating on you! I would leave someone if they avcised me of cheating on a regular basis (with zero proof/reasoning). Period. That behavior tells me they are insecure and controlling. Everything else is just more red flags. RUN
Anonymous
07/15/2025 09:26
Subject: Re:Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:You may have already heard this but when someone is always pointing the finger at you for cheating it is likely due to the simple fact that they themselves are doing just that.
Go w/your intuition on this - it sounds to me like your husband DID have an affair w/this other woman.
He is making excuses, lying about it all.
The zinger that he wouldn’t be bothered if you slept w/someone else….??!
That pretty much confirms he is a useless rat.
Only he would be furious and divorce her if she cheated. They have a complete double standard. It’s ok for them- not their wife.
Anonymous
07/15/2025 09:07
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let’s assume he is cheating. I can’t just ask him “are you cheating?” and expect the truth, and if I say I want to leave, he will deny and say I am blowing up the family for no reason.
I have no real proof, so I would be looking at seeing my kids half the time. I’m not sure this is worth it.
[b]Op, it sounds like you have no respect for yourself and no plans to change your situation, so what did you come here for?
This too 😬
Anonymous
07/15/2025 09:00
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let’s assume he is cheating. I can’t just ask him “are you cheating?” and expect the truth, and if I say I want to leave, he will deny and say I am blowing up the family for no reason.
I have no real proof, so I would be looking at seeing my kids half the time. I’m not sure this is worth it.
Op, it sounds like you have no respect for yourself and no plans to change your situation, so what did you come here for?
Anonymous
07/15/2025 08:58
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Oldest trick in the book. Sorry Op! Get your finances in order.
Anonymous
07/15/2025 07:58
Subject: Re:Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:You may have already heard this but when someone is always pointing the finger at you for cheating it is likely due to the simple fact that they themselves are doing just that.
Go w/your intuition on this - it sounds to me like your husband DID have an affair w/this other woman.
He is making excuses, lying about it all.
The zinger that he wouldn’t be bothered if you slept w/someone else….??!
That pretty much confirms he is a useless rat.
All of this!!!
Anonymous
07/15/2025 00:19
Subject: Re:Weird situation about cheating.
You may have already heard this but when someone is always pointing the finger at you for cheating it is likely due to the simple fact that they themselves are doing just that.
Go w/your intuition on this - it sounds to me like your husband DID have an affair w/this other woman.
He is making excuses, lying about it all.
The zinger that he wouldn’t be bothered if you slept w/someone else….??!
That pretty much confirms he is a useless rat.
Go w/your intuition on this - it sounds to me like your husband DID have an affair w/this other woman.
He is making excuses, lying about it all.
The zinger that he wouldn’t be bothered if you slept w/someone else….??!
That pretty much confirms he is a useless rat.
Anonymous
07/14/2025 04:29
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
I would divorce over his control issues. He doesn’t want you to talk to ANY men ( at work or at the baseball field). Due to his demands, you have changed your natural inclination to be friendly. This is not normal.
Anonymous
07/14/2025 04:25
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Your husband is unreasonable. It’s concerning that you don’t recognize this.
Anonymous
07/14/2025 01:42
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let’s assume he is cheating. I can’t just ask him “are you cheating?” and expect the truth, and if I say I want to leave, he will deny and say I am blowing up the family for no reason.
I have no real proof, so I would be looking at seeing my kids half the time. I’m not sure this is worth it.
Well start looking through your phone records and family devices.
Or invite her to lunch.
Anonymous
07/13/2025 23:17
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Ok. Let’s assume he is cheating. I can’t just ask him “are you cheating?” and expect the truth, and if I say I want to leave, he will deny and say I am blowing up the family for no reason.
I have no real proof, so I would be looking at seeing my kids half the time. I’m not sure this is worth it.
I have no real proof, so I would be looking at seeing my kids half the time. I’m not sure this is worth it.
Anonymous
07/13/2025 21:05
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
He’s cheating on you OP. This is classic cheater behavior. Don’t live in denial. Every accusation is a projection.
Anonymous
07/13/2025 20:55
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
Guy here. And this is not ok. He has no confidence in himself, respect for you or respect for your relationship.
Anonymous
07/13/2025 20:13
Subject: Weird situation about cheating.
All husbands like yours always do. ^