Anonymous
07/07/2025 21:22
Subject: Twin parents...
I hate this- by default people are going to do it, even when they mean well. One twin by default will be bigger or get better grades or get married first, etc
We have same sex twins and it helped us to put them into different sports, to never talk about grades or test scores (they don’t know each others GPA, standardized test scores, SATs) etc.
Once we got that covered at home it didn’t seem to bother them as much bc it was just outside noise. And we even joke that one of them, according to others, was “the big baby- oh that twin was a big one” when that twin only weighed 4 lbs 😂 it’s a good lesson in perspective! Also, you have to have a sense or humor or you will lose your mind.
We have same sex twins and it helped us to put them into different sports, to never talk about grades or test scores (they don’t know each others GPA, standardized test scores, SATs) etc.
Once we got that covered at home it didn’t seem to bother them as much bc it was just outside noise. And we even joke that one of them, according to others, was “the big baby- oh that twin was a big one” when that twin only weighed 4 lbs 😂 it’s a good lesson in perspective! Also, you have to have a sense or humor or you will lose your mind.
Anonymous
07/07/2025 21:03
Subject: Re:Twin parents...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Today I learned that some parents of twins are reallllllyyyyy sensitive.
Maybe, but going out with twins attracts quite a bit of unwanted attention. So many people want to ask questions, tell you about the twins in their lives, tell you your hands are full, they don’t know how you do it, they always wanted twins. You get the same questions and comments over and over and over — for years and years.
Are they identical?
Are they boy/girl?
Who is older?
Do twins run in your family?
Did you know you were having twins?
How many weeks did you make it?
I never knew so many people ask which twin is older. The first time I was asked, I wondered if the guy didn’t understand what twins are, because of course, they’re the same age. Apparently people really want to know who was closer to the exit. I know my “younger” twin has internalized that is better to be the “older” one because they’ve been asked a million times who is older, but they’ve never ever been asked who is younger.
No one comment is bad in isolation, but getting the same ones ad nauseam your entire childhood does have some effect.
Well said. Non-twin parents would never understand this on their own but you've explained it very well.
+1