Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:45
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would split the check but I’d also probably not go out with a couple who doesn’t drink. If for some reason I did find myself out with a couple who didn’t drink and I had 2 cocktails, I would offer to pay extra.
What?
NP here, and I agree. I wouldn’t have dinner with another couple who doesn’t drink either. How much fun is that? No thanks.
Are you that boring?
No, I think people who don't drink are boring and I have no desire to spend my very limited time with them.
Sounds like you are an alcoholic.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:34
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
I say always offer to split halfway. It’s a shared experience and I feel like it’s the cost of being social, and we are too old to nickel and dime everything (even if we have to make cuts in other areas)
Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:30
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would split the check but I’d also probably not go out with a couple who doesn’t drink. If for some reason I did find myself out with a couple who didn’t drink and I had 2 cocktails, I would offer to pay extra.
What?
NP here, and I agree. I wouldn’t have dinner with another couple who doesn’t drink either. How much fun is that? No thanks.
Are you that boring?
No, I think people who don't drink are boring and I have no desire to spend my very limited time with them.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:30
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:If we went out and ate and drank to please ourselves and the others had tap water and a salad we would just pay for it all.
this
Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:20
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I'm surprised by all the comments from drinkers who won't go to dinner with non-drinkers. DH and I are drinkers, and enthusiastic enough about wine that I took my sommelier certification just as a hobby.
Now, most people in our circle do drink, just because people often have friends with common interests, but we have a few that don't, and it wouldn't occur to us not to eat out with them. I can't think why you wouldn't.
It's easy enough to finish a bottle of wine between one couple, you don't need the others to split it with you. Even if a restaurant say, demands that an entire table opt in to a tasting menu in order for anyone at the table to do it, the wine pairings are always opt-in per person, so that isn't restrictive if someone doesn't want to drink. I just can't figure this out - and I say that as someone pretty serious about my wine and wine pairings.
That's probably exactly the reason... you are enjoying wine as it should be enjoyed, as part of the meal, as something you enjoy for its flavor and quality and how it complements everything else. It wouldn't matter to you whether your friends also enjoy it anymore than you should care whether they enjoy meat or pasta. As long as you all can find restaurants you all like, no issue. I imagine the ones commenting are the ones that drink to get a buzz/drunk and feel self-conscious when others are not drinking or think that makes them boring.
Yep.
It's the alcoholics who go on about people who aren't drinking being "no fun."
Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:09
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would split the check but I’d also probably not go out with a couple who doesn’t drink. If for some reason I did find myself out with a couple who didn’t drink and I had 2 cocktails, I would offer to pay extra.
What?
NP here, and I agree. I wouldn’t have dinner with another couple who doesn’t drink either. How much fun is that? No thanks.
Are you that boring?
Anonymous
05/30/2025 21:02
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Haha I will say if we don't drink can we just s t split it and if they say yes order expensive food.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 20:58
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Do separate checks. They won’t care. If they push for a reason why, just lightly say “it seems easier since we don’t drink.” Yes, it’s a bit nonsensical, but they will either understand that when you say easier, you mean fairer, or else they will just let it go.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 19:54
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:I'm surprised by all the comments from drinkers who won't go to dinner with non-drinkers. DH and I are drinkers, and enthusiastic enough about wine that I took my sommelier certification just as a hobby.
Now, most people in our circle do drink, just because people often have friends with common interests, but we have a few that don't, and it wouldn't occur to us not to eat out with them. I can't think why you wouldn't.
It's easy enough to finish a bottle of wine between one couple, you don't need the others to split it with you. Even if a restaurant say, demands that an entire table opt in to a tasting menu in order for anyone at the table to do it, the wine pairings are always opt-in per person, so that isn't restrictive if someone doesn't want to drink. I just can't figure this out - and I say that as someone pretty serious about my wine and wine pairings.
That's probably exactly the reason... you are enjoying wine as it should be enjoyed, as part of the meal, as something you enjoy for its flavor and quality and how it complements everything else. It wouldn't matter to you whether your friends also enjoy it anymore than you should care whether they enjoy meat or pasta. As long as you all can find restaurants you all like, no issue. I imagine the ones commenting are the ones that drink to get a buzz/drunk and feel self-conscious when others are not drinking or think that makes them boring.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 17:31
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:We generally just suck it up and offer to split the check down the middle in these situations. Most people we know would then offer to pay the tip or pay more to cover their drinks.
This. I figure that picking up some of the cost of someone else's fancier meal is just part of socializing. And maybe someday yours will be the more expensive one and someone will cover you without thinking about it.
lol. No. Only the people who constantly overspend on someone else’s dime think this. The non drinking vegetarian is highly unlikely to ever be the higher spender, you just tell yourself this to feel less bad about someone else subsidizing your meal 🙄
I’m a non drinking vegetarian. I am always $20 less than my friend and that’s before tip and tax. After multiple nights out together, it really adds up.
Well, given the posts on here I'm surprised anyone is willing to have dinner with you at all given that you don't drink, lol.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 17:11
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
Anonymous wrote:My DH and I happen not to drink wine, beer or liquor and we also drink tap water.
It has been our custom to Split the Bill when eating out with another couple.
Often, they have spent $50-80 on cocktails, mocktails and bottled water.
Should I/we:
—request separate checks
—suck it up
—have other couple pay entire tip
—other?
What do you do?
Pay if I invite them.
If a get together that wasn't an invite really, then just hack it up however rather than fight over who gets to pay. Don't agonize over it.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 17:05
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
If we went out and ate and drank to please ourselves and the others had tap water and a salad we would just pay for it all.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 16:23
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
I suck it up, but I am generous probably to a fault. (This is not a humblebrag, I’m really trying to be more fair to myself when it comes to splitting etc.)
You can always request separate/itemized checks.
You can always request separate/itemized checks.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 15:04
Subject: Restaurant. Check splitting question.
I would ask for separate checks.
Anonymous
05/30/2025 14:49
Subject: Re:Restaurant. Check splitting question.
I think it’s fine to ask for separate checks or even suggest a different than 50-50 split, especially if it is always one couple spending more. I would rather do that then have the drinking couple get the tip. If they are cheap enough to not offer to pay more, they are also likely to leave a lousy tip.