Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:55     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

I would have been more insistent that my DD visit more schools before applying. We only saw a few and they were all big state schools. I wish we had seen a wider variety of schools and actually visited more of the schools she applied to beforehand. She was fortunate to get into 10 of the 12 to which she applied, but then we had a mad scramble to visit them in March because our spring break had already been planned long ago and we could not cancel.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:52     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Anonymous wrote:My DC got into his ED2 choice, but I think he should have held out and applied RD. I wonder if he would have gotten into an even better school in RD. Maybe we were too risk averse? I’m starting to think RD is the way to go—no ED lock in—that way you have no regrets…


Most ppl we know got screwed doing this - unless they were a special/star applicant.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:50     Subject: Re:If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’ll add that AOs and especially readers are very unlikely to have a degree from a school higher than T100.


I actually was an admissions reader, and I disagree with this claim.


Agree. Most /many went to that school!!
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:35     Subject: Re:If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Anonymous wrote:I’ll add that AOs and especially readers are very unlikely to have a degree from a school higher than T100.


I actually was an admissions reader, and I disagree with this claim.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:34     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

My DC got into his ED2 choice, but I think he should have held out and applied RD. I wonder if he would have gotten into an even better school in RD. Maybe we were too risk averse? I’m starting to think RD is the way to go—no ED lock in—that way you have no regrets…
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:21     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Anonymous wrote:Funny so many people are saying they would do ED1/ED2. I wish my kid hadn't locked himself into a sub-Ivy ED. I feel like he would have had better choices if he'd held out.


The only people with better choices in RD had (1) niche majors/academic interests; (2) very tippy top of class; (3) national level individual awards or (4) filled a clear void at the university (nationally ranked harpist).

Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:17     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Funny so many people are saying they would do ED1/ED2. I wish my kid hadn't locked himself into a sub-Ivy ED. I feel like he would have had better choices if he'd held out.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:13     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Anonymous wrote:The more applications I read (admityogi; appIQ etc) the more you see why some kids are admitted and others aren't.

The essays, story, and overall academic narrative/application hook matter WAY more than people think.

The applicant's goal should be to help the AO condense their review into a short, compelling tagline in defense of the application (as the regional AO will absolutely need to "defend" your kid's application in committee, so give them the tools to do that).

If the app is too scattered, random, boring, generic, or unorganized, they can't (or won't) do that work, and the application will be disregarded. It's pretty simple - now in retrospect.


Got flamed on this site for saying this, but this is where a savvy college counselor is worth the $. They can't change your child's stats or ECs, but a good CC will be very smart about figuring out a narrative that appeals to an AO. Worked for my child, who IMO had kind of a scattered application going into the process.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 16:00     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Anonymous wrote:Help DC do a lot of research earlier (for those Why essays for T25).
Review ALL drafts of essays or hire a meticulous essay editor who sees a lot of successful essays and knows what works and what doesn't.

+1!!! I agree! Essays really matter and i am convinced the essays got my kid into their t10 school. Start early so you have time to research schools and customize essays for each school. Don't cut and paste- it's a wasted opportunity if you don't show your deep understanding of the school and how you fit. We spent equal time on safety and targets school essays - got into all of those as well, many with good merit.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 15:37     Subject: Re:If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

With DC1 - we landed up doing all the right steps without any strategy. It was just a little bit more stressful because we were always crunched for time.

With DC2 - we followed the same path as DCQ - but had better time management and project management. It was a breeze.

With DC2 - we knew the pathways to success - tailored to him. So, he was able to easily become a super high stat kid.

For both kids, we leveraged their stats and ECs for merit money in, in-demand STEM dual majors at instate flagship, both got good jobs, paid internships and double majors for free. College not only did not cost them anything, but they both had a neat nest-egg and a brand new sedan (car bought by us) when they graduated college. As for us, we still have money that we had in their college savings to be used for further studies, down payment to home or their big fat wedding.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 15:30     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

I would spend more time with the common data sets for schools, especially the percent of students they take out of state. We wasted time on applications where my kid was never going to get in from out of state.

I also would have pushed my son to look at more mid-size schools.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 15:15     Subject: Re:If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

I’ll add that AOs and especially readers are very unlikely to have a degree from a school higher than T100.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 15:12     Subject: Re:If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

If you have a son, have a non-PhD academic young woman review their essay and supplemental questions. DS is a great writer and enjoys doing it. He liked doing these parts of the application. DD hates writing and hating doing this with a passion. What I noticed was that DDs were much more likely to land well than DS’ app.

DS’ first draft which he thought was perfect was observational, philosophical and persuasive to his statement but was not about himself. He was answering the prompts and questions very academically. I’m sure if the department head was reading them, he would be selected immediately. There was no way this would land with a mid twenties or thirties reader looking at a rubric. His school guidance/college counselor said oh these are lovely. I sent him to his AP English teacher and she told him no way. You have to flip the questions to write about you. DS struggled with this. His next attempt was too beating around the bush, his next attempt he felt sounded arrogant. He finally nailed it. His original was 100% more beautifully written and included deeper analysis. This is the essay to turn in when you are admitted and in class. The final one was far better for the readers. He did very well.

Boys have a harder time writing about themselves, expressing emotion and hitting the right tone. It’s far more likely that a woman will be reading it. As readers spend very little time on each app, nailing tone is very important.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 12:47     Subject: If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Force my kid to do a lot more introspection in May/June/July by answering some questions (like those below) and doing a LOT of early draft writing. I'd probably have them do more summer writing earlier in high school, too.

----
The strongest applicants aren’t just checking boxes. They’re telling a story. They know how to show who they are, what they value, and how they’ve grown—across their essays, activities, and letters of recommendation.

Admissions officers aren’t choosing stats. They’re building a class. They want real (well-adjusted) people with direction and purpose—people they can imagine thriving on campus and being successful in their lives/careers.

So instead of just asking “What are my chances to get in xyz?”, try asking:

What story is my application telling?

What do my choices say about who I am?

What qualities have I shown through what I’ve done?

You already have the raw materials. The work is in connecting the dots. That’s where your uniqueness actually shows up. And you as a parent, can help them connect those dots and find the colleges with the best "fit".

Stats get you in the conversation. But reflection and self-awareness are what move the needle.

Many kids need help with that self-reflection. It's your job as a parent to help there. You know your kid better than anyone else.
Anonymous
Post 05/21/2025 12:37     Subject: Re:If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

Play the long game. Apply EA to everywhere. Use ED for a moonshot. Don't buy into the impossibility of admissions on a site like this. Believe in your kids and support them to believe in themselves and their story.