For what it’s worth I get cold sores, both my daughters get cold sores, my DH, their father, does not.

Is this a joke? You are asking if you would not date someone who gets a cold sore once in awhile? Wow

Anonymous wrote:Do you know how common, though? In the US, it's 50-80% of people who test positive, in studies. Many don't realize they have it.

Only 30% of white Americans test positive with herpes one. It’s different demographically.


I would consider dating someone with herpes one under two conditions. One, they would have to be on antiviral medicine and they would have to show me the bottle and I would have to see them take it at least occasionally. I mean, they would need to take it every day as prescribed, But I would want to actually see that they take it when I’m there in the morning, etc.

I would also want to know it’s an exclusive relationship that had the potential to lead to marriage. No way would I casually date someone who wasn’t serious about me was still dating other people

I forgot to explain that the reason I would want him to take antivirals is that that decreases viral load and makes it less likely each and transmit. It does not eliminate the risk, but it decreases it.

OP - I dated two men with HSV1. My dermatologist told if we kiss when no outbreaks, it won’t pass . I didn’t catch it. But it’s helpful to know for hsv negative people the status of partners hsv 1&2 to be cautious. For example I wouldn’t allow a guy to “go down” on me when relationship is youngish

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not.

If you catch it and things don't work out with him, your dating pool effectively shrinks down to zero. You absolutely cannot sleep with anyone without telling them, and most men will reject you.

Plus, if you want kids, you're now exposing them to it and the stigma they'll face.

If this was an incredible guy, 1 in a million, you're absolutely positive you'll get married snd live happily ever after, I'd say give it a shot and take things extremely slow.

But a man who "really likes you"? Come on. You can do better.

This has to be trolling. MOST people in the US have it -- at least more than half.

You are thinking about HPV. Half of all people definitely do not have herpes.

FWIW I would not date him either for the reasons above. Don’t mess with a lifelong disease you can transmit to your kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quick poll for those who are adamantly saying no:

On a scale of 1-10, how sure are you that you never dated anyone with HSV?

If 10=100% then 10. Got married and monogamous before herpes took off.

Hsv1 isn’t “herpes” as it is colloquially known. Hsv1 is colloquially known as “a cold sore on your mouth”. Most people have had a cold sore at some point. If so, you have Hsv1. If not, you still might have Hsv1 actually, since some people
Have it but don’t ever get a cold sore.

A COLD SORE.

Not genital herpes. Not HPV. That little irritating spot on the lip that most people occasionally get when they’re sick or stressed , maybe once every few years.

Yes but there's no guarantee you'd be warned of one coming on before oral. You cAn get hsv1 on your genitals.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quick poll for those who are adamantly saying no:

On a scale of 1-10, how sure are you that you never dated anyone with HSV?

If 10=100% then 10. Got married and monogamous before herpes took off.

Hsv1 isn’t “herpes” as it is colloquially known. Hsv1 is colloquially known as “a cold sore on your mouth”. Most people have had a cold sore at some point. If so, you have Hsv1. If not, you still might have Hsv1 actually, since some people
Have it but don’t ever get a cold sore.

A COLD SORE.

Not genital herpes. Not HPV. That little irritating spot on the lip that most people occasionally get when they’re sick or stressed , maybe once every few years.

Anonymous wrote:I would not.

If you catch it and things don't work out with him, your dating pool effectively shrinks down to zero. You absolutely cannot sleep with anyone without telling them, and most men will reject you.

Plus, if you want kids, you're now exposing them to it and the stigma they'll face.

If this was an incredible guy, 1 in a million, you're absolutely positive you'll get married snd live happily ever after, I'd say give it a shot and take things extremely slow.

But a man who "really likes you"? Come on. You can do better.

So 80% of the American populations dating pool is shrunk to zero? Make that make sense 😂

Anonymous wrote:Wondering because a man that says he really likes me wants to date me and I have real affection for him but concerned because I never had or know someone that has hsv 1 or 2. So idk how often he breaks out but I feel it's weird to ask. He says he had it since he was a child and women he's been with have not cared and hes had casual sex before but I never have and I'm a little older than him but only had one prior relationship and the guy was practically a virgin too when we were early 30s. So how to bring it up to someone or talk it out or protect myself? Yeah I know it's common on here but I'm not familiar with in it and IDK anyone who has it.

Considering the majority of humans in America have HSV1, I seriously doubt you “have never known anyone who has had it”. It’s a cold sore. You actually probably already have it yourself. Many people don’t realize they have it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quick poll for those who are adamantly saying no:

On a scale of 1-10, how sure are you that you never dated anyone with HSV?

If 10=100% then 10. Got married and monogamous before herpes took off.

You're wrong, then, unless everyone was specifically tested negative. Even then, the false negative rate is somewhere up to 4%, so you still could be dead wrong.

By age 5, about 20-35% of toddlers test positive for HSV. They catch it from adults who have cold sores (or who are shedding the virus but the cold sore hasn't shown up yet).

HSV is NOT just an STI. It's also passed by casual contact with family members.

Most people have HSV1 and many of them don't know. Fewer people have HSV2 but the percentage is still high. Meds can vastly reduce outbreaks and chances of transmission. If you get HSV1 or HSV2, your dating pool is not reduced to anywhere close to zero but the pool may be reduced because some people have the very negative reactions you've seen here. Most people don't have that reaction.

Anonymous wrote:No. You probably don't have it. You can get tested to be sure.
You also can get vaccinated to prevent cancer from some varieties. Well worth doing.
https://www.cdc.gov/cancer/hpv/preventing-hpv-associated-cancers.html

For chissakes,

HPV and HSV are not the same thing

[b]HPV and HSV are not the same thing[/b]

HPV and HSV are not the same thing

HPV and HSV are not the same thing

HPV and HSV are not the same thing

HPV and HSV are not the same thing

HPV and HSV are not the same thing

HPV and HSV are not the same thing


*********** HSV is herpes SIMPLEX virus **************

****** HPV is human PAPILLOMA virus ****************

For the love of god, educate yourself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quick poll for those who are adamantly saying no:

On a scale of 1-10, how sure are you that you never dated anyone with HSV?

If 10=100% then 10. Got married and monogamous before herpes took off.

oh bless your heart!

Anonymous wrote:Quick poll for those who are adamantly saying no:

On a scale of 1-10, how sure are you that you never dated anyone with HSV?

If 10=100% then 10. Got married and monogamous before herpes took off.

Unless you are already in love, why bother?