Anonymous
03/05/2025 10:04
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
When you can't have eyes on her, she goes in the crate or an x pen area. One of the biggest mistakes new dog owners make is that puppies should not have free rein of the house. Dogs by nature do not want to soil their homes, but puppies don't understand that all of a whole big house is their home.
I followed a specific protocol (don't remember the guy's name) where for every month without an accident (I sped up the timeline) you expose the puppy to one additional room in the house.
A crate. Not a pen. A crate.
A pen gives them room to mess. It's better than finding it throughout the house, but it's the opposite of helpful if you're trying to teach them not to mess in the house.
A crate, one just big enough for them to stand and turn around, leaves them no place for a "mess corner". Dogs don't want to soil their dens. Taking the dog straight from an appropriately-sized crate outside is the best way to teach them where their mess goes. And if you're not actively watching/engaging them, back in the crate they go.
If you have a large breed puppy, buy the appropriate-sized crate for its anticipated adult size and use the divider most of them come with to shrink the crate to an appropriate puppy size. Do not give the dog space to make a mess and escape it until they are reliable about doing their business outside.
Anonymous
03/05/2025 09:59
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
When you can't have eyes on her, she goes in the crate or an x pen area. One of the biggest mistakes new dog owners make is that puppies should not have free rein of the house. Dogs by nature do not want to soil their homes, but puppies don't understand that all of a whole big house is their home.
I followed a specific protocol (don't remember the guy's name) where for every month without an accident (I sped up the timeline) you expose the puppy to one additional room in the house.
Anonymous
03/05/2025 06:18
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:How do some of you have time to do this? I’m not being snarky, but how does anyone who works deal with a puppy? I don’t think most people have all day to be playing games with the dog, putting them in and out of the crate, etc.
It really depends on the dog, but many get the hang of it within days, not weeks or months, and then it's just a matter of having a routine and keeping a sharp eye out until they get bigger and have a mature bladder. Our current dog was fully house trained within a few days (using the method pp outlined above). I then taught him to ring a string of bells hanging on the door when he needed to go out. The only problem was that my DH and children were out of town while I house trained him, so for a while he thought he could only poop for me. If they tried to take him out, he would literally hold it and then come find me to take him out. On the other hand, I had one dog that lived to be 15 that I never fully trusted alone in the house. IME, it's the smaller dogs that are harder to house train. I loved our little guy, but I don't think I'll ever have another little dog.
I agree with the bolded. Cumulatively, small dogs make the bigger mess.
I think they do understand the idea of it in a few days, especially if you're consistent, but they aren't "potty trained" for months. And the more "oopsies" they have, the longer it takes.
Also, what you said about bonding to one person... This is why, as I said upthread, the reality of sending your dog off for doggy day care or boarding for training isn't likely to be the result you're seeking. The dog will do great for someone whose whole job is this; we're really good at noticing the cues that they need to go, and a good trainer/boarding facility will pay close attention to your dog. But if you don't keep up that same level of effort/energy and awareness once the dog gets home, it will revert to whatever it's used to doing with you. And yes, if you have multiple people helping with the dog, you all have to be on the same level with your training.
Anonymous
03/05/2025 06:14
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:How do some of you have time to do this? I’m not being snarky, but how does anyone who works deal with a puppy? I don’t think most people have all day to be playing games with the dog, putting them in and out of the crate, etc.
When people complain that the shelter/rescue/breeder won't just give you a puppy, and there's a waitlist, and there are eleventy hoops to jump through... this is why. People think a puppy is going to know commands, never mess inside, and be a dog in a week, and it takes YEARS.
Some breeds don't settle until they're 3. And until they're at least 6 months, you really ought to expect a lot of this, plus messes weekly when you goof and don't monitor closely enough. If you get a well-raised puppy (I lucked into a bottle-fed runt from a rescue once), and you put in the work early, they're usually more manageable by around 3 months. But you really ought to expect to crate them, and work intensively with them for about 6.
Anonymous
03/05/2025 01:50
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:How do some of you have time to do this? I’m not being snarky, but how does anyone who works deal with a puppy? I don’t think most people have all day to be playing games with the dog, putting them in and out of the crate, etc.
It really depends on the dog, but many get the hang of it within days, not weeks or months, and then it's just a matter of having a routine and keeping a sharp eye out until they get bigger and have a mature bladder. Our current dog was fully house trained within a few days (using the method pp outlined above). I then taught him to ring a string of bells hanging on the door when he needed to go out. The only problem was that my DH and children were out of town while I house trained him, so for a while he thought he could only poop for me. If they tried to take him out, he would literally hold it and then come find me to take him out. On the other hand, I had one dog that lived to be 15 that I never fully trusted alone in the house. IME, it's the smaller dogs that are harder to house train. I loved our little guy, but I don't think I'll ever have another little dog.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 23:00
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Day care
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:58
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
How do some of you have time to do this? I’m not being snarky, but how does anyone who works deal with a puppy? I don’t think most people have all day to be playing games with the dog, putting them in and out of the crate, etc.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:39
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
A strict schedule can help. Here’s what we did:
—all meals in the crate so she has good associations.
—play games to have her get in and out of the crate voluntarily. For example say “crate” and then throw a treat in. As soon as she’s in, give her a handful of treats from your hand while she’s in the crate. Close the door for 2 seconds and then open the door and give her the “free” command. Do this over and over again, maybe using her entire meal to reward her over the course of a 10 minute session having her go in and out do the crate. Do this with every meal, mixing in some high value treats.
1. For a schedule, have her sleep in the crate overnight. When you wake up, take her outside right away and have her pee,poop wall and play outside for 30-60 minutes. Then feed her doing the in-and-out of the crate game. Most food and treats should be in the crate.
2. Give her 5-10 minutes of indoor play time, then take her out one more time before putting her back in the crate.
3. Nap in the crate for about 90 minutes and then repeat—outside for pee, poop, play. Eat in the crate, 5 minutes of playtime inside, outside for a quick pee/poop, and then back in the crate to nap for 90 minutes.
I did not let my puppy play in the house for more than 5 minutes until he was house trained. All playing should happen outside for a month. You can slowly let him have more time outside of the crate in your house AFTER he is house trained.
—all meals in the crate so she has good associations.
—play games to have her get in and out of the crate voluntarily. For example say “crate” and then throw a treat in. As soon as she’s in, give her a handful of treats from your hand while she’s in the crate. Close the door for 2 seconds and then open the door and give her the “free” command. Do this over and over again, maybe using her entire meal to reward her over the course of a 10 minute session having her go in and out do the crate. Do this with every meal, mixing in some high value treats.
1. For a schedule, have her sleep in the crate overnight. When you wake up, take her outside right away and have her pee,poop wall and play outside for 30-60 minutes. Then feed her doing the in-and-out of the crate game. Most food and treats should be in the crate.
2. Give her 5-10 minutes of indoor play time, then take her out one more time before putting her back in the crate.
3. Nap in the crate for about 90 minutes and then repeat—outside for pee, poop, play. Eat in the crate, 5 minutes of playtime inside, outside for a quick pee/poop, and then back in the crate to nap for 90 minutes.
I did not let my puppy play in the house for more than 5 minutes until he was house trained. All playing should happen outside for a month. You can slowly let him have more time outside of the crate in your house AFTER he is house trained.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:36
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:1. You're not reading her cues when she's in the house. You need eyes on her at all times. Yell at her (not hit) when you catch her in the act of peeing or pooping inside. And then take her out by the scruff of the neck and go outside, even though you know she might have finished, just to impress your displeasure upon her and get her to understand that she needs to pee and poo outside. When she does her business outside, you need to give her a high-value treat immediately, and pet and coo at her.
2. Your carpet might have too much scent on it by now and she thinks that's where she's supposed to go. If you can roll away your carpets to have them cleaned, that would be ideal. If not, all the spots she's dumped and peed on need serious soaking in one of those dog enzyme cleaners. Don't even mop it up. Let it soak for days.
3. Finally, crate. It's normal for her to whine and scream. NEVER TAKE OUT A WHINY DOG OUT OF THEIR CRATE. They're training you, not the other way around. The longer you've been obeying their "let me out!" screams, the longer it takes to train them out of it. Put on noise-canceling headphones, and earplugs at night. Put on music while in the shower. Do not cave.
You let her out when she's exhausted herself and isn't making any noise in her crate.
4. She sounds extremely anxious. You can ask your vet for anxiety meds, and you can buy a bark collar for when you leave her alone in the house. Make sure she has a high-value treat when you leave (but I know that alone doesn't cut it for anxious dogs). Even if the neighbors aren't bothered by her barking while you're out, she's hurting herself. Dogs bark naturally at various things, including wildlife and mailmen, but the boredom or separation anxiety bark is mentally unhealthy for them. My dog only barked twice with his bark collar and learned the zap wasn't what he wanted. Don't let yourself be lulled by positive-only trainers, OP. Certain dogs need aversive tools, used wisely and sparingly. I tested the zap on myself first. Always do that.
Thank you for the advice. I did entirely remove the carpet, I will treat it and sent it to a laundromat but it won't be put back until when/if she is house trained. She does settle eventually in the crate and I never let her out while whining.
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
She needs to be in a pen or crate during those times.
This. What the hell kind of "crate training" are you doing, OP?!
The dog is in the crate unless you're actively engaging it. Period. Assuming it's a small enough puppy, take it from the crate, CARRY it out of the house, and deposit it outside where you want it to do its business. If it goes, treat. If not, give it water (outside, ideally), then CARRY it back inside to its crate, which should be just big enough for it to stand and turn around. Do not give it extra space, do not let it walk on the floor unless you're sure it's empty.
If the dog does biz outside, you can play for 10-20 minutes in an enclosed, puppy-proofed space, letting the puppy drag its leash so you always have control. Err on the side of caution with the time limit. After the timer goes off, take the dog outside (again, carry it, if it's small/accident prone) and give it the pee command again. If it goes, treat. If not, water and crate.
This is intense for about a week, and then it's done. Never take the puppy out when it's whining. If it's little, you'll need to wake in the night to be sure it gets out frequently enough (but it will also be easier to train than an older puppy/dog).
basic puppy boot camp lasts about 2 weeks, tops. You'll still need to be vigilant after that, and some breeds are harder to housebreak than others, but those first two weeks get the job done for 95% of all dogs.
If you can't handle that, aren't willing to be that intense, feel like giving up, I agree with the pp who said "give the puppy back" and let someone else have a go. The longer it stays in a stressed out household, getting scolded for doing the wrong thing without being adequately taught what's right, the harder it will be to rehome successfully later.
I wish I had known this previously. Unfortunately; I am now going back to work and won’t be home to do this ‘boot camp’ style of training.
As a side note: I live in a townhome. It’s not feasible to have a dog barking in a crate all day; which is what I’d be dealing with if I did this. Regardless, I’m going to contact the rescue. I’m a bad pet parent and not suited for a pet.
Np but what have you been doing?! This is puppy training 101. Not trying to make you feel bad but you’ve clearly been advised wrong.
She is in the crate at night (up every 90 minutes), while I’m out, and we were told to have a nap schedule. She won’t sleep for more than an hour or two in there though, so the naps are useless.
This, again, is bad advice. How old is this puppy?
It's moot, because the puppy needs to go back. But we can help you debrief so you learn from this and know better for any future pets.
Three months. Damn I am so irritated I paid for this trainer.
Still cute enough to find a new home, but yeah... this isn't the dog for you to learn on, and that trainer isn't the right one to teach either of you (or, from what I've heard of their training, anyone, really)
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:20
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:1. You're not reading her cues when she's in the house. You need eyes on her at all times. Yell at her (not hit) when you catch her in the act of peeing or pooping inside. And then take her out by the scruff of the neck and go outside, even though you know she might have finished, just to impress your displeasure upon her and get her to understand that she needs to pee and poo outside. When she does her business outside, you need to give her a high-value treat immediately, and pet and coo at her.
2. Your carpet might have too much scent on it by now and she thinks that's where she's supposed to go. If you can roll away your carpets to have them cleaned, that would be ideal. If not, all the spots she's dumped and peed on need serious soaking in one of those dog enzyme cleaners. Don't even mop it up. Let it soak for days.
3. Finally, crate. It's normal for her to whine and scream. NEVER TAKE OUT A WHINY DOG OUT OF THEIR CRATE. They're training you, not the other way around. The longer you've been obeying their "let me out!" screams, the longer it takes to train them out of it. Put on noise-canceling headphones, and earplugs at night. Put on music while in the shower. Do not cave.
You let her out when she's exhausted herself and isn't making any noise in her crate.
4. She sounds extremely anxious. You can ask your vet for anxiety meds, and you can buy a bark collar for when you leave her alone in the house. Make sure she has a high-value treat when you leave (but I know that alone doesn't cut it for anxious dogs). Even if the neighbors aren't bothered by her barking while you're out, she's hurting herself. Dogs bark naturally at various things, including wildlife and mailmen, but the boredom or separation anxiety bark is mentally unhealthy for them. My dog only barked twice with his bark collar and learned the zap wasn't what he wanted. Don't let yourself be lulled by positive-only trainers, OP. Certain dogs need aversive tools, used wisely and sparingly. I tested the zap on myself first. Always do that.
Thank you for the advice. I did entirely remove the carpet, I will treat it and sent it to a laundromat but it won't be put back until when/if she is house trained. She does settle eventually in the crate and I never let her out while whining.
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
She needs to be in a pen or crate during those times.
This. What the hell kind of "crate training" are you doing, OP?!
The dog is in the crate unless you're actively engaging it. Period. Assuming it's a small enough puppy, take it from the crate, CARRY it out of the house, and deposit it outside where you want it to do its business. If it goes, treat. If not, give it water (outside, ideally), then CARRY it back inside to its crate, which should be just big enough for it to stand and turn around. Do not give it extra space, do not let it walk on the floor unless you're sure it's empty.
If the dog does biz outside, you can play for 10-20 minutes in an enclosed, puppy-proofed space, letting the puppy drag its leash so you always have control. Err on the side of caution with the time limit. After the timer goes off, take the dog outside (again, carry it, if it's small/accident prone) and give it the pee command again. If it goes, treat. If not, water and crate.
This is intense for about a week, and then it's done. Never take the puppy out when it's whining. If it's little, you'll need to wake in the night to be sure it gets out frequently enough (but it will also be easier to train than an older puppy/dog).
basic puppy boot camp lasts about 2 weeks, tops. You'll still need to be vigilant after that, and some breeds are harder to housebreak than others, but those first two weeks get the job done for 95% of all dogs.
If you can't handle that, aren't willing to be that intense, feel like giving up, I agree with the pp who said "give the puppy back" and let someone else have a go. The longer it stays in a stressed out household, getting scolded for doing the wrong thing without being adequately taught what's right, the harder it will be to rehome successfully later.
I wish I had known this previously. Unfortunately; I am now going back to work and won’t be home to do this ‘boot camp’ style of training.
As a side note: I live in a townhome. It’s not feasible to have a dog barking in a crate all day; which is what I’d be dealing with if I did this. Regardless, I’m going to contact the rescue. I’m a bad pet parent and not suited for a pet.
Np but what have you been doing?! This is puppy training 101. Not trying to make you feel bad but you’ve clearly been advised wrong.
She is in the crate at night (up every 90 minutes), while I’m out, and we were told to have a nap schedule. She won’t sleep for more than an hour or two in there though, so the naps are useless.
This, again, is bad advice. How old is this puppy?
It's moot, because the puppy needs to go back. But we can help you debrief so you learn from this and know better for any future pets.
Three months. Damn I am so irritated I paid for this trainer.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:18
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:1. You're not reading her cues when she's in the house. You need eyes on her at all times. Yell at her (not hit) when you catch her in the act of peeing or pooping inside. And then take her out by the scruff of the neck and go outside, even though you know she might have finished, just to impress your displeasure upon her and get her to understand that she needs to pee and poo outside. When she does her business outside, you need to give her a high-value treat immediately, and pet and coo at her.
2. Your carpet might have too much scent on it by now and she thinks that's where she's supposed to go. If you can roll away your carpets to have them cleaned, that would be ideal. If not, all the spots she's dumped and peed on need serious soaking in one of those dog enzyme cleaners. Don't even mop it up. Let it soak for days.
3. Finally, crate. It's normal for her to whine and scream. NEVER TAKE OUT A WHINY DOG OUT OF THEIR CRATE. They're training you, not the other way around. The longer you've been obeying their "let me out!" screams, the longer it takes to train them out of it. Put on noise-canceling headphones, and earplugs at night. Put on music while in the shower. Do not cave.
You let her out when she's exhausted herself and isn't making any noise in her crate.
4. She sounds extremely anxious. You can ask your vet for anxiety meds, and you can buy a bark collar for when you leave her alone in the house. Make sure she has a high-value treat when you leave (but I know that alone doesn't cut it for anxious dogs). Even if the neighbors aren't bothered by her barking while you're out, she's hurting herself. Dogs bark naturally at various things, including wildlife and mailmen, but the boredom or separation anxiety bark is mentally unhealthy for them. My dog only barked twice with his bark collar and learned the zap wasn't what he wanted. Don't let yourself be lulled by positive-only trainers, OP. Certain dogs need aversive tools, used wisely and sparingly. I tested the zap on myself first. Always do that.
Thank you for the advice. I did entirely remove the carpet, I will treat it and sent it to a laundromat but it won't be put back until when/if she is house trained. She does settle eventually in the crate and I never let her out while whining.
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
She needs to be in a pen or crate during those times.
This. What the hell kind of "crate training" are you doing, OP?!
The dog is in the crate unless you're actively engaging it. Period. Assuming it's a small enough puppy, take it from the crate, CARRY it out of the house, and deposit it outside where you want it to do its business. If it goes, treat. If not, give it water (outside, ideally), then CARRY it back inside to its crate, which should be just big enough for it to stand and turn around. Do not give it extra space, do not let it walk on the floor unless you're sure it's empty.
If the dog does biz outside, you can play for 10-20 minutes in an enclosed, puppy-proofed space, letting the puppy drag its leash so you always have control. Err on the side of caution with the time limit. After the timer goes off, take the dog outside (again, carry it, if it's small/accident prone) and give it the pee command again. If it goes, treat. If not, water and crate.
This is intense for about a week, and then it's done. Never take the puppy out when it's whining. If it's little, you'll need to wake in the night to be sure it gets out frequently enough (but it will also be easier to train than an older puppy/dog).
basic puppy boot camp lasts about 2 weeks, tops. You'll still need to be vigilant after that, and some breeds are harder to housebreak than others, but those first two weeks get the job done for 95% of all dogs.
If you can't handle that, aren't willing to be that intense, feel like giving up, I agree with the pp who said "give the puppy back" and let someone else have a go. The longer it stays in a stressed out household, getting scolded for doing the wrong thing without being adequately taught what's right, the harder it will be to rehome successfully later.
I wish I had known this previously. Unfortunately; I am now going back to work and won’t be home to do this ‘boot camp’ style of training.
As a side note: I live in a townhome. It’s not feasible to have a dog barking in a crate all day; which is what I’d be dealing with if I did this. Regardless, I’m going to contact the rescue. I’m a bad pet parent and not suited for a pet.
Np but what have you been doing?! This is puppy training 101. Not trying to make you feel bad but you’ve clearly been advised wrong.
She is in the crate at night (up every 90 minutes), while I’m out, and we were told to have a nap schedule. She won’t sleep for more than an hour or two in there though, so the naps are useless.
This, again, is bad advice. How old is this puppy?
It's moot, because the puppy needs to go back. But we can help you debrief so you learn from this and know better for any future pets.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:17
Subject: Re:I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Just an FYI for the thread: "potty training" for a dog doesn't mean the dog will never have an accident. Full-grown, fully-trained dogs will still occasionally "oops" in the house. Sometimes, it's behavioral. Sometimes, it's medical and you should get them checked out. Either way, your pets will make the occasional messes throughout their lives, and that's normal. Frustrating, and occasionally disgusting, but normal pet behavior.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:15
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:1. You're not reading her cues when she's in the house. You need eyes on her at all times. Yell at her (not hit) when you catch her in the act of peeing or pooping inside. And then take her out by the scruff of the neck and go outside, even though you know she might have finished, just to impress your displeasure upon her and get her to understand that she needs to pee and poo outside. When she does her business outside, you need to give her a high-value treat immediately, and pet and coo at her.
2. Your carpet might have too much scent on it by now and she thinks that's where she's supposed to go. If you can roll away your carpets to have them cleaned, that would be ideal. If not, all the spots she's dumped and peed on need serious soaking in one of those dog enzyme cleaners. Don't even mop it up. Let it soak for days.
3. Finally, crate. It's normal for her to whine and scream. NEVER TAKE OUT A WHINY DOG OUT OF THEIR CRATE. They're training you, not the other way around. The longer you've been obeying their "let me out!" screams, the longer it takes to train them out of it. Put on noise-canceling headphones, and earplugs at night. Put on music while in the shower. Do not cave.
You let her out when she's exhausted herself and isn't making any noise in her crate.
4. She sounds extremely anxious. You can ask your vet for anxiety meds, and you can buy a bark collar for when you leave her alone in the house. Make sure she has a high-value treat when you leave (but I know that alone doesn't cut it for anxious dogs). Even if the neighbors aren't bothered by her barking while you're out, she's hurting herself. Dogs bark naturally at various things, including wildlife and mailmen, but the boredom or separation anxiety bark is mentally unhealthy for them. My dog only barked twice with his bark collar and learned the zap wasn't what he wanted. Don't let yourself be lulled by positive-only trainers, OP. Certain dogs need aversive tools, used wisely and sparingly. I tested the zap on myself first. Always do that.
Thank you for the advice. I did entirely remove the carpet, I will treat it and sent it to a laundromat but it won't be put back until when/if she is house trained. She does settle eventually in the crate and I never let her out while whining.
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
She needs to be in a pen or crate during those times.
This. What the hell kind of "crate training" are you doing, OP?!
The dog is in the crate unless you're actively engaging it. Period. Assuming it's a small enough puppy, take it from the crate, CARRY it out of the house, and deposit it outside where you want it to do its business. If it goes, treat. If not, give it water (outside, ideally), then CARRY it back inside to its crate, which should be just big enough for it to stand and turn around. Do not give it extra space, do not let it walk on the floor unless you're sure it's empty.
If the dog does biz outside, you can play for 10-20 minutes in an enclosed, puppy-proofed space, letting the puppy drag its leash so you always have control. Err on the side of caution with the time limit. After the timer goes off, take the dog outside (again, carry it, if it's small/accident prone) and give it the pee command again. If it goes, treat. If not, water and crate.
This is intense for about a week, and then it's done. Never take the puppy out when it's whining. If it's little, you'll need to wake in the night to be sure it gets out frequently enough (but it will also be easier to train than an older puppy/dog).
basic puppy boot camp lasts about 2 weeks, tops. You'll still need to be vigilant after that, and some breeds are harder to housebreak than others, but those first two weeks get the job done for 95% of all dogs.
If you can't handle that, aren't willing to be that intense, feel like giving up, I agree with the pp who said "give the puppy back" and let someone else have a go. The longer it stays in a stressed out household, getting scolded for doing the wrong thing without being adequately taught what's right, the harder it will be to rehome successfully later.
I wish I had known this previously. Unfortunately; I am now going back to work and won’t be home to do this ‘boot camp’ style of training.
As a side note: I live in a townhome. It’s not feasible to have a dog barking in a crate all day; which is what I’d be dealing with if I did this. Regardless, I’m going to contact the rescue. I’m a bad pet parent and not suited for a pet.
Np but what have you been doing?! This is puppy training 101. Not trying to make you feel bad but you’ve clearly been advised wrong.
She is in the crate at night (up every 90 minutes), while I’m out, and we were told to have a nap schedule. She won’t sleep for more than an hour or two in there though, so the naps are useless.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:12
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Side note, I’ve looked into a boot camp I can send the dog to to take care of this, but I’m not sure how a boot camp out of the home would help with house training?
Dogs generalize. If they learn to go on grass, they will seek out grass and only go on grass. My first dog only went on leaves if she could help it, because I house trained her in the fall...
If the trainer gets her going outside, she will be 90% of the way when she gets back to you. You will just need to show her the same rules apply at your house, but it should take a few days instead of a few weeks.
This is horrible advice, and only likely to prolong the suck.
I can get a lot of dogs to do a lot of things. That does NOT directly translate to their owners being able to get the same results. Sending a puppy off to be trained elsewhere has fairly poor results, and the ROI is usually not great. You, the human, are really the one who needs the training. You need to learn to speak better dog so your commands, etc. get through. Without that, even the best trained dog is going to have reduced performance. It's user error.
Encouraging the exhausted OP to invest more time/money/effort into this dynamic without those investments being 99% human training is just a terrible take. Sure, some training facility will be happy to take your puppy and your money, but the results rarely justify the expense.
Anonymous
03/04/2025 22:09
Subject: I was an idiot to get a puppy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:1. You're not reading her cues when she's in the house. You need eyes on her at all times. Yell at her (not hit) when you catch her in the act of peeing or pooping inside. And then take her out by the scruff of the neck and go outside, even though you know she might have finished, just to impress your displeasure upon her and get her to understand that she needs to pee and poo outside. When she does her business outside, you need to give her a high-value treat immediately, and pet and coo at her.
2. Your carpet might have too much scent on it by now and she thinks that's where she's supposed to go. If you can roll away your carpets to have them cleaned, that would be ideal. If not, all the spots she's dumped and peed on need serious soaking in one of those dog enzyme cleaners. Don't even mop it up. Let it soak for days.
3. Finally, crate. It's normal for her to whine and scream. NEVER TAKE OUT A WHINY DOG OUT OF THEIR CRATE. They're training you, not the other way around. The longer you've been obeying their "let me out!" screams, the longer it takes to train them out of it. Put on noise-canceling headphones, and earplugs at night. Put on music while in the shower. Do not cave.
You let her out when she's exhausted herself and isn't making any noise in her crate.
4. She sounds extremely anxious. You can ask your vet for anxiety meds, and you can buy a bark collar for when you leave her alone in the house. Make sure she has a high-value treat when you leave (but I know that alone doesn't cut it for anxious dogs). Even if the neighbors aren't bothered by her barking while you're out, she's hurting herself. Dogs bark naturally at various things, including wildlife and mailmen, but the boredom or separation anxiety bark is mentally unhealthy for them. My dog only barked twice with his bark collar and learned the zap wasn't what he wanted. Don't let yourself be lulled by positive-only trainers, OP. Certain dogs need aversive tools, used wisely and sparingly. I tested the zap on myself first. Always do that.
Thank you for the advice. I did entirely remove the carpet, I will treat it and sent it to a laundromat but it won't be put back until when/if she is house trained. She does settle eventually in the crate and I never let her out while whining.
For the house training - I am struggling to have eyes on her all the time. I need to shower / leave the room sometimes.
She needs to be in a pen or crate during those times.
This. What the hell kind of "crate training" are you doing, OP?!
The dog is in the crate unless you're actively engaging it. Period. Assuming it's a small enough puppy, take it from the crate, CARRY it out of the house, and deposit it outside where you want it to do its business. If it goes, treat. If not, give it water (outside, ideally), then CARRY it back inside to its crate, which should be just big enough for it to stand and turn around. Do not give it extra space, do not let it walk on the floor unless you're sure it's empty.
If the dog does biz outside, you can play for 10-20 minutes in an enclosed, puppy-proofed space, letting the puppy drag its leash so you always have control. Err on the side of caution with the time limit. After the timer goes off, take the dog outside (again, carry it, if it's small/accident prone) and give it the pee command again. If it goes, treat. If not, water and crate.
This is intense for about a week, and then it's done. Never take the puppy out when it's whining. If it's little, you'll need to wake in the night to be sure it gets out frequently enough (but it will also be easier to train than an older puppy/dog).
basic puppy boot camp lasts about 2 weeks, tops. You'll still need to be vigilant after that, and some breeds are harder to housebreak than others, but those first two weeks get the job done for 95% of all dogs.
If you can't handle that, aren't willing to be that intense, feel like giving up, I agree with the pp who said "give the puppy back" and let someone else have a go. The longer it stays in a stressed out household, getting scolded for doing the wrong thing without being adequately taught what's right, the harder it will be to rehome successfully later.
I wish I had known this previously. Unfortunately; I am now going back to work and won’t be home to do this ‘boot camp’ style of training.
As a side note: I live in a townhome. It’s not feasible to have a dog barking in a crate all day; which is what I’d be dealing with if I did this. Regardless, I’m going to contact the rescue. I’m a bad pet parent and not suited for a pet.
Yeah, your "trainer" did you dirty. DIRTY. Dirty AF. Truly, you should get your money back. This is crazy...
The dog seems habituated to barking in the crate now, so yeah. I can see how that dynamic in a townhome is a problem. That said, I've raised 4 puppies in my current apartment, which has paper-thin walls and zero soundproofing. It's noisy for a day or two. I give my neighbors the heads up (and a bottle of wine, for goodwill). Shared walls mean occasional shared noises. Again, too late now for this puppy, but wanted to put it out there for others reading, and for your future consideration.
It's not that you're a "bad pet parent", but you definitely need better training/support before attempting to puppy train again. You tried. Learn from that, take this one back, recalibrate, and then maybe consider practicing your dog training skills on an older dog. They need the same crate discipline strategy, at least at first, but the "at first" is over MUCH faster, and the frequency of engagement can be spread out a lot further.
Puppies are INTENSE. As long as you do right by this one by giving him back so he can find another home while he's still little and cute (that really is nature's best trick for their survival, because they're all jerks at this stage!), it'll be okay.