Do we really have to pretend that a lot of antisocial and unhealthy behavior statistically accompanies poverty? It’s not about being Latino, it’s about the poverty.

I live in an area with very poor white families. The frequent issues I see that I don’t want my preschooler exposed to are:
- watching totally inappropriate/scary media for children
- extremely unhealthy eating habits and food
- casual abuse and violence. Parents screaming at kids and hitting them in public, using verbal insults to kids, adults screaming at each other, and just much more harsh language than I’m comfortable with

I refuse to pretend these issues aren’t more common in lower income people, in general. I don’t think exposure to these behaviors benefit kids at all.

Well I certainly would not want my child around any of those Mormons!

My DD’s first preschool when she was 2 was primarily low-income, in a not nice part of town, and had only a few children who spoke fluent English. When she turned 3 she started at a preschool-8th grade school because we were worried about competitive K admissions.

It’s a parenting choice I regret. We should have kept her at the first preschool. The other families there were not at all competitive like at our current school, and everyone was generous and kind with each other. The teachers were incredibly experienced and met each child where they were. The kids were earnest and took good care of each other and were patient about the language barriers they all faced. My child was genuinely loved and our little community of parents may not have socialized together but we constantly shared food and gifts. I didn’t know how good I had it.

I don’t think my DD has ever been truly understood at her fancy private school, even when she was really little, but her 2s preschool teachers knew her better than I did some days.

Choose a place with warm, nurturing teachers and nothing else matters.

At my kids’ preschool, we are not all white but we are all middle class. It has been like an instant community. All the parents are on a group chat. We have such fun parties and play dates. We work similar schedules so it’s easy. We really help each other out.

I don’t know any other preschool but from what I’ve heard, it’s hard to find this sort of community in a title 1 environment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want a community for my kids. Which means peers and their parents. My kids have been in a title 1 school and it was zero community for my kid. Never again. I would rather donate to some non-profit serving latinos.

Make your own friends. It’s weird you feel like you have to make friends with other kid’s parents.

I’m not the above poster but we once invited our whole title 1 class to a birthday party (at a playground near school, food for kids and adults) and only two kids showed up. So I totally understand wanting a community for your kid.

Yeah they have tons of cousins to play with and celebrate with relatives, so yeah. Same here at a title 1 majority Latino school.
At 3 it might be ok but…

Anonymous wrote:I want a community for my kids. Which means peers and their parents. My kids have been in a title 1 school and it was zero community for my kid. Never again. I would rather donate to some non-profit serving latinos.

Same experience in K-2 for us, switched to a “good” school and it was a totally different experience

Of course if it's a reputable program.

Of course. Is this a serious question. I hope not!

3 y.o.'s (even 3 y.o.'s who come from broken families) are pretty innocent. My father was a junkie who would beat my teenage mother, but when I was 3 I was happy as a clam playing with my planes and trucks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No.
My problem is not LATINO parents and their children. I am all for language immersion for my child.

My problem is lower income families. There is nothing good about poverty. Poverty is a curse. And many children and parents are traumatized because of that.

Maybe you can verbalize what exactly you’re afraid of.

Are you afraid your kids will catch The Poverty? Are you afraid your kids will accidentally touch Walmart quality clothing? Or they’ll be invited to a play date at someone’s *gasp* apartment? Poverty isn’t contagious. I’m not sure what your issue is. Unless your issue is just being around poor people.

How does being around poor children benefit my child?

As opposed to what- being around middle class children?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No.
My problem is not LATINO parents and their children. I am all for language immersion for my child.

My problem is lower income families. There is nothing good about poverty. Poverty is a curse. And many children and parents are traumatized because of that.

Maybe you can verbalize what exactly you’re afraid of.

Are you afraid your kids will catch The Poverty? Are you afraid your kids will accidentally touch Walmart quality clothing? Or they’ll be invited to a play date at someone’s *gasp* apartment? Poverty isn’t contagious. I’m not sure what your issue is. Unless your issue is just being around poor people.

Not the responder, but I can speak as a class parent in a very diverse K program.
When it came to collecting a few bucks for a subscription to education program (think something like Highlights or National Geo Kids), the underprivileged families wouldn't cough up 5 bucks - that's 5 bucks for an entire school year.
I also organized the annual school supplies delivered every year a few days before the start of school. The underprivileged families would not order supply kits and the teachers of those classes basically had to take the kits of the few who did order and spread them around as best they could.
And then there are behavioral issues. In preschool, academics don't matter yet. But as the child ascends in grade level, yes, peers really do matter. The more disruptive a student, the more the teacher's energies are devoted to the disruptive student instead of teaching all the kids who are paying attention and happy to learn.
But even preschool kids are clued into who the disruptive kids are in their classes and don't like it.

Maybe homeschool is your speed then. Because my kids go to a not particularly diverse public elementary in an affluent area and...guess what. There are plenty of kids with issues. Disruptive kids. Kids that are not nice. Kids with bad manners. Kids who eat crap and play video games and have ...colorful...vocabularies. That just comes with the territory of raising children in the year 2025. But the children of lawyers and master's degree holders and feds would get the benefit of the doubt from you or "well, there's always some bad apples"...instead of their "issues" being attributed to the fact that their parents don't make a lot of money.

Ick.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want a community for my kids. Which means peers and their parents. My kids have been in a title 1 school and it was zero community for my kid. Never again. I would rather donate to some non-profit serving latinos.

Make your own friends. It’s weird you feel like you have to make friends with other kid’s parents.

I’m not the above poster but we once invited our whole title 1 class to a birthday party (at a playground near school, food for kids and adults) and only two kids showed up. So I totally understand wanting a community for your kid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No.
My problem is not LATINO parents and their children. I am all for language immersion for my child.

My problem is lower income families. There is nothing good about poverty. Poverty is a curse. And many children and parents are traumatized because of that.

Maybe you can verbalize what exactly you’re afraid of.

Are you afraid your kids will catch The Poverty? Are you afraid your kids will accidentally touch Walmart quality clothing? Or they’ll be invited to a play date at someone’s *gasp* apartment? Poverty isn’t contagious. I’m not sure what your issue is. Unless your issue is just being around poor people.

Oh Dear. Walmart quality clothing is not an issue. And you will never ever be invited for a playdate in someone's apartment either, so that is not an issue.

The problem is that with poverty comes other issues - food insecurity, uneducated parents, broken family, substance abuse, teen pregnancy, perhaps immigration status issues, criminality, violence, bullying, bad manners etc.

I don't want my kid to understand these societal ills at a young age by being around peers who come from poverty and paucity mindset.

Frankly I’m more concerned about a paucity moral mindset from UMC white ladies

Anonymous wrote:I want a community for my kids. Which means peers and their parents. My kids have been in a title 1 school and it was zero community for my kid. Never again. I would rather donate to some non-profit serving latinos.

Make your own friends. It’s weird you feel like you have to make friends with other kid’s parents.

I want a community for my kids. Which means peers and their parents. My kids have been in a title 1 school and it was zero community for my kid. Never again. I would rather donate to some non-profit serving latinos.