OP, my parents spent years basking in what they thought was an ideal community while I was ridiculed and picked on every day. All their nice friends! all the nice activities centered at school! all the nice families in my siblings' classes!

The problem was that I didn't come clean enough with my parents over what was happening. It lasted for years.

As an adult, I now go extensively out of my way to avoid social failure. I hate entertaining, worry constantly that no one will show up if I invite them, obsess over even simple conversations after they are over (wondering how I screwed up), and have trouble believing that people actually like me even if they seem to.

I know who created this: the kids I went to school with, when my parents couldn't protect me because I didn't tell them.

And there are uncountable numbers of kids out there who are light-years worse off than I am.

YOUR KID TOLD YOU. YOU KNOW.

Do something. Rescue the adult version of her while there is time. Be brave enough to build a new community that supports your kid, not just you.

Anonymous wrote:Tell principal you’re giving them the opportunity for a constructive solution and then you’re going to the superintendent.

The hierarchy is not Principal > Superintendent. There are a lot more layers you should go through before you even think about approaching the superintendent with this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell principal you’re giving them the opportunity for a constructive solution and then you’re going to the superintendent.

The school has given her a solution!

She’s entitled to ask what her options are. Why are you all afraid to make a phone call or two

Anonymous wrote:Tell principal you’re giving them the opportunity for a constructive solution and then you’re going to the superintendent.

The school has given her a solution!

Tell principal you’re giving them the opportunity for a constructive solution and then you’re going to the superintendent.

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry your daughter is going through this and I’m sorry her school is not being helpful. I’m afraid that many people in MCPS don’t have the compassion or empathy that they should and I’m sorry.

How are you blaming MCPS when they told OP exactly what she needs to do, but OP refused to in order to save some friendship?

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry your daughter is going through this and I’m sorry her school is not being helpful. I’m afraid that many people in MCPS don’t have the compassion or empathy that they should and I’m sorry.

Thank you, you sound sane!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love this forum since it's anonymous and I can shake my head and laugh at all the naysayers. I don't know what reality you are living in!!!! You mean to tell me she is going to REPORT the Poms captain and boys on the football team. And then when they all go to chipotle on a friday night and see each other that things aren't going to be 10000x worse??? They might "protect" DD inside the brick walls of the school, but on social media and at parties and out in the community she will be made a PARIAH. GET REAL.

But that’s not why mom is not reporting it. She is not reporting it to protect her social status.

You are wrong, this is OP. I think I misspoke and confused everyone. My dd does not want to blow up HER social world. But it is intertwined. I know many of these parents. They are all on the same sports teams etc. It's a tangled web. If my dd WANTED to file a report I would embrace it, but she does NOT. She know it's social suicide.

Anonymous wrote:I’m so confused. How on earth are you friends with people whose kids are bullying yours?! Seriously?? This happened to my DS in middle school and I quietly distanced myself from those “friends”. No drama, didn’t say anything about it, but couldn’t really stand to be around them beyond polite niceties when necessary. How can you even stand it?

The boys parents are friends of friends, not my direct friends. The girls mom I am distancing. We've been "friends" for 20 years. The girls have been friends since preschool. There is A LOT of history.

Anonymous wrote:So sorry this is happening to your DD.

Thanks.

This seems odd to me. The new semester started weeks ago, no? Did you ask right away, after the 1st day or two? Our counselor/HS are pretty accommodating about schedule changes but usually that happens in the first week of a new semester (tends to be a lot of changes that first week). . I can see the reluctance in switching mid semester (more work for the teachers, no?)

The semester started yesterday, she asked to be moved first thing yesterday.

Could you speak to the teacher of said class, explain the situation and make sure they are seated far apart? (Probably cc the counselor) or ask the counselor to do so?

She already has.

Do you have any idea why this is happening with this group, or what triggered this?? Did something specific happen? It seems like really immature behavior for high school aged kids TBH.

No idea other than her former best friend wanted to social climb to the top. And now prob thinks she sounds cool trashing her old friend group (not just my daughter, all of them). The a-hole boys prob think they have a shot at her so they do her dirty work.

Anonymous wrote:I love this forum since it's anonymous and I can shake my head and laugh at all the naysayers. I don't know what reality you are living in!!!! You mean to tell me she is going to REPORT the Poms captain and boys on the football team. And then when they all go to chipotle on a friday night and see each other that things aren't going to be 10000x worse??? They might "protect" DD inside the brick walls of the school, but on social media and at parties and out in the community she will be made a PARIAH. GET REAL.

But that’s not why mom is not reporting it. She is not reporting it to protect her social status.

Anonymous wrote:1. No. There is no advocate who works on behalf of parents in MCPS. MCPS's goal is to stifle and oppress parents as much as possible. Parents are a threat to be contained in the system's view.

What a great school system. Glad I moved to be in MCPS.

2. You need to grow a pair and file the appropriate bullying reports. You can't claim these so-called bullies are terrorizing your child and ruining her life, but you're scared to name them on paper because you share social circles with their parents. You need to grow up and choose your child over your friendships.

I'm not worried about myself, I am worried about DD.

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to skip class every single day then request an assessment and 504 for class refusal.

A real solution, thanks

I love this forum since it's anonymous and I can shake my head and laugh at all the naysayers. I don't know what reality you are living in!!!! You mean to tell me she is going to REPORT the Poms captain and boys on the football team. And then when they all go to chipotle on a friday night and see each other that things aren't going to be 10000x worse??? They might "protect" DD inside the brick walls of the school, but on social media and at parties and out in the community she will be made a PARIAH. GET REAL.

Tell her to skip class every single day then request an assessment and 504 for class refusal.